


Revelation Sunshine

by TheArtificialDane, veronicasanders



Series: Galactica [14]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Characters besides Courtney and Vixen are minor, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Lesbian Character of Color, Lesbian Sex, Light Power Play, Smut, Strap-Ons, Trans Female Character, Vixen is trans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:53:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 38,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24640396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheArtificialDane/pseuds/TheArtificialDane, https://archiveofourown.org/users/veronicasanders/pseuds/veronicasanders
Summary: Courtney is a queer pop star and the first gay Disney Princess. Vixen is a trans activist/author/and political science professor. This story occurs in the Galactica universe after Courtney's co-star gives her Vixen's book.
Relationships: Courtney Act/The Vixen
Series: Galactica [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1191028
Comments: 42
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Though this story was written for the AQ Black Girl Magic Challenge, it's a ship I've wanted to explore for a long time. 
> 
> TW: vague reference to past transphobia, sexual apprehension/nervousness that should in NO WAY be construed as dubcon

It was Honey who introduced them. Or, rather, Honey who handed Courtney the book that started everything, on the set of Glimmer 3. 

_BEWARE WHITE TEARS: Performativity and Racial Justice_ , by Toni “Vixen” Taylor enthralled Courtney so much that she barely slept for 3 nights, devouring it twice. And then she read the whole thing again, slowly, highlighting the parts that blew her mind the most. 

On set, when she just couldn’t stop raving about it, Honey laughed at her.

“So...you liked it?”

“Omigod, yes!” Courtney exclaimed. “I mean, obviously I feel very called out. But in a good way? Like...this is making me rethink everything.” 

“That’s good! I thought maybe you’d be offended,” Honey said, adjusting her crown. 

“Offended? How long have we known each other?” Courtney giggled, bumping Honey with her hip. It was true: they’d been co-starring in the Glimmer franchise for 8 years at that point. 

“Still.” 

“But god, Honey, it was just...I mean, I don’t even have any words for how amazing it was. She’s so fucking smart and passionate, and so funny, and everything she says is like…” Courtney shook her head, starry-eyed. 

“You should tell her,” Honey said with a saucy wink. “Send her a tweet or something.”

“She’s not gonna care what I think,” Courtney said. “I mean, hello? Chapter 4?”

“Okay, but she’s a professor. She’ll be thrilled that someone learned something. Besides, even if she doesn’t respond, maybe you’ll encourage your fans to read it.” 

“That’s true…”

“And maybe get more people to listen to her podcast-”

“She has a podcast?!!” Courtney shrieked excitedly, then whispered, “Sorry,” when she saw the boom operator cringe. 

Maybe Honey was right...but what should she say?

***

Vixen felt absolutely silly. There was really no reason for attention from a celebrity to make her so giddy. True, there’d been a phase when she hung on Courtney Act’s every word--but that was years ago. Early in her transition, when she felt like nothing she did was right. When she was desperate for any voice telling her that who she was was okay. 

It was different now. She was 30 year old, for fuck’s sake. She didn’t need validation from anyone anymore, especially not a pop-star-come-Disney-princess. At least, that’s what she would have told anyone who asked. 

But to herself, she couldn’t deny the thrill she got when she saw that first notification on her phone. The mild anxiety all day as she taught two lectures and graded a handful of thesis proposals--a nagging thought in the back of her mind wondering how she should reply. It wasn’t until late into the evening, after 2 glasses of wine, that she allowed herself to read it again, slowly typing out a reply. 

_Courtney Act @courtneyact ∙ 15h  
Just read @professorvixtaylor’s “Beware White Tears” and my mind is BLOWN. Everyone needs to read this game-changing book. E V E R Y O N E!!!! It’s so good, so informative, so powerful. AND I just found out that she has! A! Podcast!! #obsessed <3 <3 <3 <3_

_Dr. Vixen Taylor @professorvixtaylor ∙ 1m  
Replying to @courtneyact  
Glad you found it interesting! Thanks for the plug. _

That was fine, right? Very chill. She went to sleep feeling pretty satisfied with herself. It wasn’t until the following morning when she saw Courtney’s response.

_Courtney Act @courtneyact ∙ 6h  
Replying to @professorvixtaylor  
That is the understatement of the year!!! I LOVED it! You are BRILLIANT. I just listened to the first episode of your podcast and holy shit...it’s phenomenal. _

Vixen put down her phone, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. It was shallow and cheap--being this enchanted by obviously exaggerated praise. But still...not a bad way to start the day.

***

Vixen was used to fighting. All of her life, it seemed, she’d had to prove herself. Scrape and claw for her voice to be heard. Shout into the void over and over, praying that someone would eventually listen. Demand attention and bang down doors and yell until she was hoarse. 

Having someone at Courtney’s level of fame pay attention to her--emphatically describe her as _brilliant, incisive, powerful, mind-blowing_ \--Vixen’s impulse, in the beginning, was to lie. To say she didn’t need that kind of validation from anyone, especially a rich, famous, beautiful white girl. The embodiment of privilege. Someone whose coming out was celebrated in the media like a massive human rights achievement. Because how could someone like that ever really get it?

But on the other hand…she had to hand it to Courtney. She had excellent taste in podcasts. 

And there _was_ something soothing about a person who didn’t expect her to prove anything. Someone who respected her from the jump, who engaged with her book and her podcasts from a place of dignity, assuming that she knew what she was talking about. She didn’t demand back-up or further explanations when she came across material that was confusing. She did the work _herself_ , looking up the articles and studies Vixen cited, posting them with a quote when something in particular caught her attention. 

So reluctantly, over the next month or two, Vixen found herself warming to the idea of a real dialogue. It was January 1st, sitting on her grandmother’s plastic-covered sofa, when Vixen finally bit the bullet and slipped into Courtney’s DMs, so to speak. 

Courtney had been tweeting up a storm over the holidays. Gobbling up her podcasts rapidly and hungrily, heaping her and her guests with praise and incidentally, making her subscriber numbers climb. She opened a direct message window, typing out a message that she hoped would make Courtney laugh. 

_@professorvixtaylor: Alright, already. This is getting embarrassing..._

The response came within minutes. 

_@courtneyact: LOL! Listen, nobody ever accused me of a lack of enthusiasm._

_@professorvixtaylor: I bet not ;)_

It took one afternoon of DMs before Courtney gave Vixen her phone number. “Twitter’s great, but it’s probably easier to just text, right?” 

Well.

Vixen had to admit, she had a point. 

***

“So listen,” Latrice said, heaving a deep sigh. “I hate to be the one to tell you this. Like, I really, really hate it.” 

“Oh shit,” Courtney said, wrapping herself in a blanket and preparing herself for whatever horrible news her manager was about to deliver. “Go ahead…” 

“This isn’t coming from me, okay? It’s coming from Disney.” 

“Just tell me, Latrice. What? Is the tour canceled? Do they hate the new video? Do we need to do reshoots? What?” 

“No, all that’s fine. They just...they’re a little uncomfortable about your interactions with this Vixen person.”

“Why?” Courtney sat up, ready to get extremely annoyed, extremely fast.

“Well, it’s just...she’s apparently got some very radical ideas, and-”

“So? Maybe they’re amazing ideas? Have you read the book?” Courtney countered. 

Latrice sighed. 

“Courtney, listen. It’s just...not what they want while they’re trying to promote this last movie.”

“It’s a movie that ends with a gay interracial marriage!” Courtney exclaimed. “So why the _fuck_ do they have a problem with me complimenting a Black political science professor on Twitter?! This is beyond idiotic, Latrice, you _have_ to admit that! And by the way, I’m not gonna stop. She’s amazing and her book is important and more people should know about her, and if they want to fire me, then _fine!_ ” Courtney’s heart was racing as she tried to catch her breath. 

There was a pause before Latrice spoke again. 

“I assumed this would be your response.”

“Yeah, so. Now what?!” 

“Now, I tell them that you feel very strongly about this, and that you’re not breaching any contract, and if they try to silence you on this issue, you’re prepared for a very public, very embarrassing fight,” Latrice said. 

“Okay…” Courtney waited for the catch. 

“I’m pretty sure they’ll drop it.” 

“Just like that?” Courtney asked, confused. She’d gotten herself well and riled up, prepared for a real battle. 

“Yeah, baby,” Latrice said. “Just like that. Chalk it up to white privilege.”

Courtney couldn’t help but laugh at that, head falling back on the sofa cushions. 

“Good one, ma’am.” 

After they hung up, Courtney opened Instagram, delighted that Vixen had updated her story. It was just a casual picture, her and two other professors getting ready to speak at a round table discussion. Courtney smiled, replying to the picture with heart eyes and the question, ‘Is that top from my collection?’

She responded a little while later, while Courtney was on the elliptical, saying, ‘I was hoping you’d notice. ;)’ 

Courtney giggled to herself, wondering when she’d get to meet this amazing, glowingly beautiful woman. All she wanted was to finally talk, face to face. Maybe in the spring, when her tour hit Chicago? Which, as far as Courtney was concerned, couldn’t happen soon enough. 

***

It may very well have been a love letter, Vixen thought, finding her cheeks blazing hot at the thought. She’d woken up to a video posted on Courtney’s Twitter feed. “How To Be a Race Ally.” 

Vixen watched the whole video with a healthy amount of skepticism. It was great, actually. Humble and informative. Cleverly incorporating some of the points from her podcast (with proper credit given) and even some things she’d said over text recently (also with credit, and a wink straight into the camera that made Vixen feel things she wasn’t prepared for at 7:30 in the morning). 

_Dr. Vixen Taylor @professorvixtaylor ∙ 1m  
Replying to @courtneyact  
Okay fine, you can come to the cookout. _

As usual, Courtney's response was lightning fast, an emoji wearing a party hat and about 10 exclamation points. Vixen couldn’t resist teasing her a little bit more.

_Dr. Vixen Taylor @professorvixtaylor ∙ 1m  
Replying to @courtneyact  
I don’t know how vegan-friendly it’ll be, though. _

_Courtney Act @courtneyact ∙ 1m_  
Replying to @professorvixtaylor  
You really think I’m there for the food? ;P

Vixen rose from her bed, an almost giddy feeling filling her chest. She really needed to calm the fuck down. What was with this silly schoolgirl behavior? And on a public platform? Every interaction ran the risk of absolutely ruining the street cred she’d spent years building up. (Monet was already making it her personal mission to screenshot every exchange and then tease her mercilessly, and Asia had begun to join in.) 

Besides, what were the odds that it would ever be anything but a short-lived flirtation? Courtney was bound to become captivated by something else soon. An animal rights group, perhaps. Or funding for the arts in public schools. There were a billion issues competing for her attention. How long would Vixen’s moment in the sun possibly last?

And yet, when Courtney tweeted that she was on her way to New York, Vixen found herself taking a shot of liquid courage and then sending a text. 

_VIXEN: Hey...how long are you gonna be in New York?_

_COURTNEY: A couple of weeks, why?_

_VIXEN: Well, I have a conference at Columbia on February 23, and then I’m gonna stay for a few days. Maybe we could meet up?_

_COURTNEY: YES_

_COURTNEY: I mean, sure. Sounds lovely. Tell me what day you’re free. <3 _

***

It was strange, seeing Courtney in person after all this time. As much as Vixen enjoyed chatting with her, and as validating as it was to get so much attention, she had reminded herself over and over again that this was all just friendly banter. A bit of lighthearted flirting, maybe, but the possibility of a genuine romantic connection was absolutely out of the question. 

But then.

When Courtney first emerged from the elevators, smile bright, it was like time ceased to be linear. Nothing...not pictures, not video, not even that concert she’d attended all those years ago, prepared her for how heart-stoppingly beautiful she was in person. 

Vixen stood, in slow motion, knees shaking a little, suddenly hugely aware of her height. Was Courtney always this _little?_ Why had Vixen worn heels? 

It must have taken Courtney less than 10 seconds to cross the lobby to where Vixen stood, but for some reason, it felt like 10 _years_. Excruciatingly slow, and yet somehow, Vixen was still caught off guard as she bounded up and grasped both of her hands. 

“Thank you so much for coming!” Courtney exclaimed, that dazzling smile still on her face. “It’s amazing to finally be in the same room!” 

“Yeah, it’s…” Vixen offered a smile of her own, swallowing hard. Her hands were warm and soft, and as Vixen gazed down at her, she could feel her heart racing faster than ever. “How was your day?” 

“Crazy…” Courtney linked an arm through Vixen’s, leading her towards the hotel bar. 

It took a concerningly short time for all the weirdness to dissipate, for Vixen to forget that she was across the table from a celebrity, a person she’d been following for years, a person that she’d idolized at one point in her life. 

She was just a girl. Granted, she was a beautiful girl, but one who seemed incredibly excited, even honored, to be talking to Vixen—about her book, her podcast, her life. Where she came from and what she cared about and who she looked up to. A girl who wanted to get to know her. 

After awhile, when Vixen was finally relaxed enough to really open up, she told Courtney about hearing ‘Kaleidoscope’ for the first time. How, at that point in her transition, it made all the difference in the world to see Courtney so open about the fluidity of gender and sexuality. To hear those magical words. _‘This is who we are.’_

Courtney nodded along, listening to her, tears filling her eyes. She covered Vixen’s hand with her own, and said, “I needed it too.” 

As the hours ticked by, they talked about everything. Passion, art, travel, identity. She wanted to know when Vixen began to question her own gender, how she knew that she wanted to transition. She was delighted by the story of her brief foray into drag during the early college years, the source of her now permanent nickname. In spite of all the questions (or maybe because of them), for once, Vixen felt like she wasn’t on the defensive. She found herself being more sincere and honest about all of it than she’d been in a long time. 

“I’m not usually this open,” she admitted at one point. 

Courtney laughed, eyes glittering, and said, “I’m usually _too_ open.” 

“I think you’re just right,” Vixen replied, giving her a generous smile. 

They talked about their childhoods. How much she loved pretend and fantasy as a kid. 

“I went through a phase—that’s generous, it was like 3 years—where I really wanted to be a dragon. I had this dumb...dragon hoodie, that I wore all the time. And when I finally grew out of it, I cried.” 

“Aww,” Courtney said, reaching for her hand. “I bet you were adorable.” 

“I think I just really, really didn’t want to be _me_.” 

Courtney took in a slow, deep breath, and then let it out even slower. 

“I’m not gonna pretend that I really get it. Everything you’re talking about. I don’t know if I ever could. But...I get that part.” 

Vixen raised an eyebrow. 

“You? How do _you_ get it?” Vixen let out a chuckle. “I’m not trying to judge you, but I just...look at you. You’re this perfect, sparkly princess. Everything the world wants a girl to be.” 

“Yeah...I see what you’re saying. But...sometimes it feels like that’s all the world wants. Is the sparkly princess part. And I’m more than that. Or, I _hope_ I am. But…” Courtney trailed off, wrinkling her nose. “Do I sound really dumb?” 

“You don’t sound dumb. You sound like a very intelligent, thoughtful...sparkly princess.” 

Courtney threw back her head and laughed. 

“I can’t believe you laughed at that,” Vixen said with a shake of her head. “It was such a cheap shot.” 

“Well, I’m an easy laugh,” Courtney said, shrugging unapologetically. 

“Yeah I’ve heard that about you,” Vixen couldn’t help saying, and Courtney’s giggles continued. 

They stared at each other for a few moments, eyes burning in the dim light, with matching, goofy grins decorating their faces, until Vixen broke, shaking her head. 

“This is so surreal…”

“How so?” Courtney asked, voice lilting in a way that felt almost like a tease, resting a chin on her hand. 

Vixen hesitated. It felt so cliché to say that it was because Courtney was famous, or because she once cried at her concert when she was 23. 

“I mean...you’re not even really my type,” she finally answered with a small shrug.

“Oh yeah? What’s your type?” 

“Ummm...I normally go for curvy Latinas,” Vixen said, lashes fluttering.

Courtney’s eyes widened, smile deepening, as she exclaimed, “Oh my god, me too!”

They both started laughing again, clinking glasses for good measure.

“So, um...do you have to go back to Chicago tomorrow?” 

“Actually, no. I decided to stay a few more days,” Vixen replied. “See some shows, meet up with some friends. There’s this museum in Brooklyn that I’ve been dying to check out for years.” 

“What museum?” Courtney asked. 

“It’s, uh, called the Museum of Contemporary African Diasporan Arts,” Vixen said. “Kind of a mouthful but-”

“Sounds great. I wish I could see it.” 

“You wanna come? I’m going tomorrow after lunch.” 

“Ugh, I wish!” Courtney said, stretching her neck. “But the press tour schedule is insane. I’m doing two more interviews tomorrow, and then I fly to LA to kick off the tour.” 

“Tough breaks.” Vixen tried, unsuccessfully, not to sound sarcastic.

“Listen, I’m not complaining. I’m very lucky.” Courtney smiled, tilting her head. “But it would’ve been cool to see that museum.” 

“Next time,” Vixen promised. 

“I’m holding you to that,” Courtney said, gaze fixed on Vixen’s face as she downed the rest of her drink. 

Vixen gave a small nod, finding her eyes hypnotic. Surreal indeed. 

They ordered yet another round as hotel patrons trickled out, crowd thinning, closing time approaching. By the time they stood up to leave, they’d knocked back quite a few--more than Vixen realized at the time. She grabbed Courtney’s arm to steady her as the blonde swayed in her heels. 

“You alright?” 

“Mmhmm…” Courtney gazed up at her, lashes fluttering. 

“Do you want me to help you upstairs?” 

“Okay…” 

In the elevator, Courtney wrapped her arms around Vixen’s waist, leaning a head on her shoulder. Vixen’s heart hammered in her chest, one hand gripping the railing for support. 

At the door, Courtney looked up at her, eyes bright, breathing out, “You know, we don’t have to be up until 10 tomorrow…” 

“What are you…‘we?’” 

It took Vixen a moment to catch on to her train of thought, a wave of nerves washing over her. 

“Listen. Um. I think you’re great,” she began, wincing as she saw Courtney’s blissful expression crumble. “But...I just, I never hook up with girls who’ve been drinking. It’s just…”

Vixen didn’t want to explain the whole story. The girl in the lesbian bar, years ago, who danced with her all night, flirting and rubbing against her, inviting her back to her apartment. Only, when they began to undress, and it became clear that Vixen’s body was a little different, the girl flipped a switch. Went from a delightful buzz to drunken rage. Accused her of taking advantage, called her...Vixen didn’t even want to think about that. Or about how she’d left her apartment as fast as possible, terrified and choking back tears. How at home, she’d collapsed into Asia’s arms and sobbed most of the night, wondering if she’d ever fit in, anywhere. 

Courtney wasn’t that girl in the bar—Vixen knew that. But she was clearly tipsy, and some things, some decisions, required a clear head. 

“It’s not you,” she finished lamely. “You’re amazing.” 

Courtney nodded, swallowing her disappointment like a champ and saying, “ _You’re_ amazing.” 

Before she left, Vixen leaned in and brushed her lips against Courtney’s cheek. 

She walked toward the elevator, regret stinging the back of her throat. She had no idea how long it would be before they saw each other again, and suddenly her arbitrary rules based on one shitty asshole in a bar 7 years ago seemed...absurd. She turned back around. Courtney was still leaning in her open doorway, watching her walk away. 

“Hey, how drunk are you, actually? Can you recite the Pledge of Allegiance?” Vixen asked. 

“No—” Courtney said, brow furrowed.

“Oh.” Vixen’s heart deflated a bit. 

“—Because we don’t have the Pledge of Allegiance in Australia.”

“Right,” Vixen laughed. 

“But what about, um, okay... _so...here's a story from A to Z. You wanna get with me, you gotta listen carefully. We got Em in the place who likes it in your face. You got G like MC who likes it on a. Easy V doesn't-_ ”

Vixen strode forward and silenced her with a kiss, soft and sweet, almost chaste at first, both of them giggling. As the kiss deepened, Vixen grabbed Courtney around the waist and pushed her backward into the room, letting the door slam shut behind them. 

Vixen was so enamored that she barely registered Courtney’s massive hotel suite, the entry hall or huge living room that Courtney led her through on the way to the bedroom. Guiding her by her hips to the bed, Courtney pushed her into a seated position and stood between her legs, chasing her lips as she took hold of her collar, fingering the little pearl buttons down the front of her shirt dress. 

“Is this okay?” she asked, and Vixen nodded. 

“Yeah.” She watched Courtney’s heavy-lidded eyes as she quickly opened the buttons, skin prickling as she pushed it off Vixen’s shoulders. She kissed Vixen again, deep and messy, sucking on her bottom lip. 

Panting, Vixen reached around, fumbling for Courtney’s zipper. Once she pulled it down a few inches, the cotton dress easily came off over her head, and then there she was, standing in front of Vixen in nothing but a pair of baby blue panties. 

Vixen swallowed, eyes sweeping over Courtney’s body, dying to touch her but nervous as all fuck. 

“Listen, um...I should tell you…” 

Courtney paused mid-way through opening Vixen’s belt to look at her curiously, face earnest and alert. The perfect student. 

Vixen sighed. The fact that Courtney was so willing to listen, so considerate, should have been a bonus. But in this moment, it just made her feel startlingly inadequate. She hated this. The feeling of not being enough, or being too much. She didn’t even know anymore. All she knew was that she was about to make herself more vulnerable than she’d ever been, and she was terrified. 

“So...Okay, um. I guess...it’s just been a long time since...I was with a girl.” 

“Tell me about it,” Courtney said, grinning.

“No. A _really_ long time,” Vixen said. 

“Okay. Does that mean you don’t want-”

“No!” Vixen burst out, a little too emphatically, and then lowered her eyes bashfully, adding in a calmer voice, “No, I want to be with you, I just...might be a little out of practice.” It was an understatement, a lie of omission that unsettled Vixen’s stomach a bit. But it was all she felt comfortable with revealing at the moment, and she hoped that she’d be forgiven later. 

“Hmm…” Courtney took Vixen’s face in her hands, tilting her chin up. “I think I can work with that…” 

She bent down to kiss her again, soft as a whisper, fingers stroking Vixen’s cheekbones, before pulling back and gazing down at her. 

“God,” Courtney breathed, “You are _so_ beautiful.” 

Vixen took in a shaky breath, her hands finally lifting to slide around Courtney’s hips. Something about the way Courtney looked at her was different than anything she’d ever experienced. She’d been the object of lust before, and sometimes very much enjoyed it. But this was more than that. She felt more than sexy, more even than beautiful. She felt _seen_. 

But for once, rather than get all wrapped up in anxiety about what it meant, Vixen acted on instinct. She gripped Courtney's waist and pulled her forward, flinging her onto her back on bed. Courtney squealed delightedly, pulling her along. 

Courtney smiled up at her, reaching a hand out but then pausing, letting her fingers rest on Vixen’s shoulder. 

“Am I allowed to touch your hair? ‘Cause I’ve heard...” 

Vixen couldn’t help laughing as she nodded and said, “That rule doesn’t really apply here.” 

“Okay,” Courtney giggled, fingering her twists gently. 

Vixen turned her head, pressing a kiss to Courtney’s wrist, then slowly moving up her arm, and finally nuzzling into her shoulder. Her skin smelled fresh and almost sweet, like she’d recently been in a doughnut shop. It wasn’t sugary like some kind of food-based perfume or soap, just a gentle, vague deliciousness that Vixen became addicted to immediately, burying her face into her neck to inhale deeply. 

She found a soft, tender spot, just below Courtney’s ear, that made her sigh when kissed, and began to suck. Courtney inhaled sharply, hips thrusting up against Vixen’s, hands tightening in her hair. 

“You like that?” Vixen asked, emboldened, hands sliding up from her waist to scratch gently at her ribcage. 

“Uh huh,” Courtney breathed, arching up again as Vixen kissed her, thumb brushing over her hardened nipple. A whimper fell from her lips. 

Vixen’s dress was half off at this point, pushed down around her waist, and when Courtney’s fingers began to trail lightly up and down her back, she shivered. Courtney pushed the dress further down, wriggling it over Vixen’s hips to her thighs, and Vixen pulled it off the rest of the way. 

She was expecting to feel uncomfortably exposed, both of them now just in their panties—a situation she hadn’t found herself in with a woman is a very fucking long time. Especially a woman she liked this much. But instead of feeling awkward, she found her pulse racing with excitement, nearly breathless in anticipation of what might come next. 

She realized that she’d been frozen for a few moments when Courtney raised herself up on her elbows and asked, “Are you alright?” 

Vixen nodded, and Courtney sat up further, reaching out to touch her cheek. 

“You want to take a break? Slow things down?” 

“No,” Vixen said simply, slipping her fingers under the sides of Courtney’s panties. Her hips lifted, allowed Vixen to slide them off easily, heart in her throat when she saw how glistening wet she was already. She knew that she was potentially in over her head, but there was also a strong urge to keep going, pulse racing with desire. 

“Come here.” Courtney stretched out her arm, pulling Vixen in for a kiss, tongues tangling together. She rolled Vixen over, onto her back, grinding down against her. 

As much as Vixen wanted to please her, ceding control to Courtney felt liberating. She watched through heavy-lidded eyes as Courtney lavished her with affection, layering kisses against her skin. When a warm tongue swirled over her nipple, her hips jerked up, a stifled moan escaping from her throat. 

Courtney sucked harder on her nipple, hands sliding down her torso, lips following as they trailed over Vixen’s tense abdomen. She hooked her fingers into the sides of Vixen’s panties and then looked up questioningly. 

“Can I...?” 

“Go ahead,” Vixen replied, straining to raise her hips, finding her core muscles in a weakened state, skin so flushed and hot that for a moment, she barely remembered to be self-conscious. Until Courtney began to slide her panties down, and suddenly she remembered exactly what she’d been dreading. When the reality of who she was would confront Courtney, more than theoretical, more than an idea. 

Her chest rose and fell rapidly as she watched Courtney’s face. If she had any qualms about a girl with a dick, she certainly didn’t show it. She simply continued to suck soft kisses into her skin, warm hands resting on her thighs. 

Vixen finally relaxed backwards, eyes falling shut. She let go of all her worries, all her stupid insecurities. At least for now. At least while Courtney took her dick into her mouth, tongue flicking delicately at her. Vixen’s hips thrust upwards, hands gripping the comforter tightly, moans dripping from her lips like honey. 

It had been so achingly long since anyone had touched her this way. Maybe no one ever had, she realized as she arched into the soft caresses. She’s certainly never experienced this kind of loving attention from a woman, a woman treating her like she was precious and beautiful, turning her into a gasping, quivering mess. Vixen felt herself falling apart quickly, losing control, nearly gone before she had the wherewithal to choke out a pained warning. 

“I’m-I’m gonna-”

“Mmhmmm…” Courtney made no move to stop, swirling her tongue again, then taking her deeper, sucking harder. 

“Oh _fuck_ ,” Vixen moaned, hips pumping uncontrollably as she came, gasping for air. 

The way Courtney’s hands stroked her thighs, continued to suck softly as she melted backwards into the pillows, every muscle in her body going slack--the small part of her that was still conscious shivered with delight, thrilled with the feeling of being spoiled. 

It wasn’t until her body was completely still, bones feeling like jelly, when Courtney began to work her way up her body once again, hands sliding over her skin until she came nose to nose with her once again. 

Courtney smiled, kissing her cheeks, down along her jaw, the corner of her mouth. Lips rousing her from a state of sheer exhaustion into warm, sleepy affection. Her hands circled Courtney's waist. 

“How are you feeling, baby?” Courtney murmured. 

“Uh huh.” 

Courtney giggled, twirling a lock of her hair around her finger as she pressed more kisses against her. 

Vixen sighed contentedly, pulling her in close, not caring how clingy and pathetic she might seem, just wanting the warmth of Courtney’s body against her own. Courtney snuggled into her arms, slipping to the side of her, legs still tangled together. 

After a few slow, lazy kisses, Vixen started to sense a shift. Courtney’s breath grew hot and ragged, hips rutting against her. She cautiously moved a hand down, working it in between her thighs, fingers seeking out her wet heat. 

“Show me what you want,” she urged, desire to give Courtney pleasure finally outweighing her fear of looking like an amateur. 

Courtney lifted her head, giving her a sleepy grin and reaching down to guide her. She patiently showed Vixen exactly where to touch her, what to do to tease her, when to speed up and circle her clit, how deep for her fingers to go and exactly how to curl them to make her tremble. Vixen followed her breathless instructions, guided by Courtney’s own hand, thrilled at the way her body responded. 

Soon, Courtney’s eyes were rolled back, muscles straining, tits brushing against Vixen’s chest as she thrusted against her fingers, fucking down into them, breathy moans music to Vixen’s ears. Her hips moved faster and faster until she stopped, whimpering, just barely grinding against the heel of Vixen’s hand, lips pressed to her neck. 

Vixen had never made a girl come before, and it was so much more beautiful than she’d imagined, from the way her lashes fluttered against her cheeks to the slick sheen of sweat on her forehead, to her ass flexing, muscles still twitching against Vixen’s fingers. And the best part, the way she looked up at Vixen at the end, eyes locked with hers as the waves of pleasure radiated through her body, fingers wound tightly into her hair. 

“Fuck,” Courtney sighed, collapsing against Vixen’s body, trapping her hand for a few moments before realizing it and letting her wriggle free with a sleepy laugh. “Sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” Vixen said, tilting her chin up for a kiss. Her whole body had suddenly become soft and pliant, and all Vixen wanted was to wrap her into an embrace. She wasn’t expecting it to feel this intimate. A part of her had even worried that this whole affair would be wrapped up in a one-night stand. But as Courtney cuddled against her, heart still hammering, she felt closer to her than ever. “I should probably tell you…”

“Mmm?” 

“What I said earlier, about not being with a girl in a long time?” Vixen swallowed. “I uh...I haven’t really had a girlfriend since high school. And I guess I’ve come close since then, but never really went through with it...as me. The real me.” 

Courtney lifted her head, fingers trailing down Vixen’s arm, a smile playing on her lips. 

“Thank you for trusting me with the real you,” she said softly. 

Vixen nodded, not sure what more there was to add, when a clap of thunder outside scared the living shit out of her, causing her to nearly jump out of her skin. So much for a warm and fuzzy moment. 

Courtney laughed, pulling up the covers and cocooning them both, pressing a kiss to her forehead. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you,” she said, snuggling tight against Vixen’s body. 

“You better,” Vixen replied. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: After flirting via text and social media for a few months, Vixen and Courtney finally met in person, and ended up in bed.   
> This chapter: After a slightly awkward morning, they try to navigate an undefined long-distance situation. 

It could have been a lazy morning, cuddling in bed while the rain pounded down outside, streaming against the windows, turning the whole world blurry and surreal. Vixen could have stayed in bed, warm and safe, and basked in the glow of their adorable puppy-love until Courtney had to leave for her photoshoot. 

She could have let herself enjoy this—whatever it was, for at least a few more hours. 

Instead, she woke up feeling unsettled and insecure, slipping out of bed to hunt down a toothbrush while Courtney dozed peacefully. It wasn’t until she was trying to quietly put her clothes back on and figure out where the hell her coat was that Courtney stirred. 

“Good morning,” Courtney said with a yawn, sitting up slowly, tousled hair falling over her shoulders. 

“Hey, sorry, I was trying not to wake you,” Vixen said. Her coat was nowhere to be found, she realized, because it was still downstairs where she’d checked it when she arrived. She rolled her eyes at her own alcohol-fueled stupidity and shoved her feet into her shoes. 

It seemed to take Courtney a few moments to comprehend what Vixen had said, brow furrowing. 

“You weren’t gonna say goodbye?” she asked softly. 

Vixen froze. 

“No, that’s not what I...I just know it’s early and I didn’t want to bother you with-” 

_Shit._

Courtney pulled the blankets up over her chest, an inscrutable expression on her face. 

“Look, I know that I have a reputation for…” she paused, swallowing, “...I guess, taking this kind of thing lightly. But, that’s not what this is. I _really_ like you.” 

Guilt bloomed in Vixen’s chest as she moved to the bed, sitting down beside her. It actually hadn’t occurred to her, until this very moment, that Courtney might be feeling a scrap of the insecurity that plagued her. Everything about her life felt so charmed and perfect and easy; it was hard to remember that she was human too. 

“I’m sorry,” Vixen said sincerely. “I really like you too. I just...I wasn’t thinking.” 

Courtney nodded. It seemed like she believed her, so Vixen decided not to push it. 

“Um...you fly back tonight, right?” 

“Yeah.” 

“And then your tour starts on-”

“Friday,” Courtney answered, a hint of resigned exhaustion in her voice before adding a chipper, “Can’t wait!”

Vixen chuckled softly. 

“Well...then I guess I’ll see you when you’re in Chicago.” 

“Yeah?” Courtney’s eyes shone hopefully. 

“Of course. I wouldn’t miss it.” 

Courtney gave her a lopsided grin, which deepened when Vixen moved closer, kissing her lightly. 

“Hey, um...text me later. Tell me about that museum,” Courtney told her, fingers lacing with Vixen’s. 

“I will. And you...let me know how everything goes today.” 

“Sure.” 

When Vixen pulled back to look at her, she was relieved as the brightness in her eyes. It was going to be a long couple of months, but with things being what they were, it seemed unwise to try and define their relationship any more than “can’t wait to see you again.” So for now, this would have to do. 

***

Trying to keep a lid on her obvious fuming, Vixen typed out a text. 

_Sorry to bother you right now, but the guard won’t let us in without backstage passes. Can someone maybe call him?_

“Where are your passes?” the guard said again, crossing his arms, a scowl on his face. 

“I...already told you, we don’t _have_ passes, but I’m supposed to be on the list. Toni Taylor.” Vixen shifted, indignation rising in her chest as he stared her down. She was not going to lose it, though. Not here. 

“You’re not on the list,” he said, giving a dismissive wave of his hand. 

“Show him the text!” Monet said, elbowing her in the ribs. 

“Oh right...sir, look. I have a text from Courtney Act that says to meet her here. I just contacted her again, but I’m sure she’s busy, so if you could-” 

“How the hell do I know that’s a real text?” the guard scoffed. 

“I...how far would we get if it wasn’t?!” Vixen asked, exasperated. “You think her people are just gonna let us in? Do you think that _we_ think we can sneak around anywhere?” Vixen gestured to their group, five tall Black women all in bright, colorful club wear. Not the most inconspicuous of groups. 

_COURTNEY: OMG COMING NOW_

“She says she’s coming,” Vixen said, looking up at the girls. 

“Herself?” Monique asked, head tilted questioningly. 

“I...I don’t know,” Vixen said. 

But in fact, within 2 minutes, Courtney rounded the corner, in silver thigh-high boots and a makeup smock, hair half in curlers, the blonde offset by fresh rainbow highlights, marching towards them like a bat out of hell. A terrified redheaded boy wearing a headset followed on her heels.

“Where are they?!” Courtney demanded, then looked up and spotted Vixen, her face softening, hurrying toward her. She wrapped Vixen into a tight embrace, saying, “I’m so sorry about this, are you okay?” 

“Yeah, we’re fine,” Vixen laughed. “Don’t worry, no one got out of line.” 

“Okay. I’m sorry, this kind of shit is so _fucking_ irritating.” 

The guard, utterly chagrined now, started to stammer out an apology, but Courtney held up her hand. 

“It’s fine. It’s your boss that I’m annoyed at.” 

“So are they all on the list for-”

“Yes! All of them! Jonathan, give them the passes.” Courtney snapped her fingers at the ginger boy by her side, who hurriedly handed out VIP backstage passes to the whole group as Courtney led them back down the hall to the green room. 

Mayhem and Monet exchanged a glance, Mayhem mouthing, ‘ _BAD ASS_ ,’ and Monet laughing silently, nodding. 

When they finally reached the large green room, Courtney turned around, urging the girls to make themselves comfortable. 

“Have a seat anywhere. There’s food, drinks, and I…” she clasped her hands together. “...I’m so sorry about that.” 

“It’s fine, girl. I _love_ seeing someone yell at a douchey bouncer. Hi, I’m Monet.” She reached out a hand towards Courtney. 

“Monique,” Monique jumped in quickly. “…and this is Mayhem.” 

“Monet...Monique...Mayhem…” Courtney repeated with a nod. “Well, that’s gonna be a challenge.” 

“Why?” Vixen asked, brow furrowed. “‘Cause all Black people look the same?” 

Courtney’s eyes widened in alarm. 

“No!” she insisted. “No, I meant because it’s just a lot of M names! And if-” she stopped short, seeing the stifled grins on all the faces around her, and narrowed her eyes. 

Unable to hold back any longer, the girls all burst out laughing, peals of laughter bouncing off the walls. Courtney shook her head at Vixen, grinning. 

“Good one. I almost had a heart attack,” she said, finally allowing herself to chuckle. 

“Vix, what have we told you about scaring white girls just before their concerts?” Asia asked. 

“Uhh...to do it?” The girls continued to laugh. 

“Hey...I’m Moesha,” Asia said, and Courtney nodded slowly. When Mayhem hit her on the arm, she grinned and said, “Just kidding. I’m Asia.” 

“Thank god,” Courtney breathed, a relieved giggle escaping. “So, I’m so glad you guys are here, but I kinda need to go finish preparing. I, uh…” She gestured to her half-done makeup and hair. 

“Of course. Don’t worry about us,” Asia told her. “You go do your thing, get your makeup done, we’ll just be here. We’re gonna switch shirts and then test you on all the names.”

“Brilliant,” Courtney laughed. She turned to Vixen, fingers brushing against her wrist, asking, “Do you wanna come...hang out while they finish my makeup? You can see Kylie.” 

“Sure!” 

“Who’s Kylie?” Asia asked coyly, and Vixen turned around to give her a warning look before following Courtney into the adjacent room. 

“Her _dog._ ” 

“Oh. Pity. I was hoping that it was her pus-”

_“Asia!”_

***

The concert was great—Vixen hadn’t seen Courtney perform for years, and she’d certainly upped the production value. Plus, having a VIP experience with some of her closest friends was awesome. It felt like the old days, all of them laughing and drinking and dancing and gossiping like school girls. Asia especially made her feel some type of way—ever since making partner at her law firm, she’d been working so much that Vixen hardly saw her. But tonight, they felt like kids again, even doing shots at one point, laughing until their stomachs hurt. 

By the time they met Courtney backstage, collapsed in a sweaty mess on one of the green room sofas, Vixen felt pleasantly buzzed, happy and warm all over. 

They settled in with more drinks and Indian food ordered from a nearby restaurant. 

“So, how do you guys all know each other?” Courtney asked.

“College, mostly.” Vixen said, telling her how Asia was her RA freshman year at Hillman. “I was a fucking mess,” she said, laughing. 

“You sure were,” Asia agreed, telling Courtney, “She spent most of the Fall semester on my carpet in tears.” 

“Awww…” 

“Well, fuck you, I had a lot on my mind!” Vixen snapped, then giggled again. “And, uh...Monique was in the same dorm. Although we didn’t really become friends until that Spring.” 

“Yes! That philosophy class, with the...ugh,” Monique recalled, shaking her head. 

“Monet was my study partner until she abandoned me,” Vixen went on, and Monet laughed. 

“Listen, I just didn’t connect with all that sociology jargon. It didn’t _speak_ to me,” Monet said. 

“And uh, Mayhem met Monet through some educational leadership networking bullshit, right?” 

“Yeah, that’s right.” Monet nodded. 

“And now we’re just...a bunch of boring ladies who work too hard and meet like once every 2 months for brunch,” Monique said.

“Party!” Mayhem added, clinking their classes. 

Courtney grinned, listening to them share stories of their debaucherous college days and their sordid, stressed out twenties. Vixen could tell she was exhausted, knew that she was sacrificing her precious few hours of sleep before she had to get back onto the tour bus, just to hang out with her and get to know her friends. 

Vixen kept looking over at her with a stupid, goofy smile on her face. At some point, it became permanent, making her cheeks hurt. 

When the tour manager pulled Courtney away for a quick discussion, Asia took Vixen’s hand and squeezed it, saying, “Now, I know you don’t need my approval…but I like her.” 

“Thanks,” Vixen grinned. Well. Continued grinning. 

“And tell her I want tickets to the Oscars.” 

“Oooh!” Monet chimed in. “I wanna go to the Tonys!” 

“Yeah, I’m sure that’ll be her first priority, guys,” Vixen said with an eye roll. 

“It’s not fair...why can’t a rich, famous pop star fall in love with _me?_ ” Mayhem whined. “I’m very lovable.” 

“Ehhh,” Monique gave her the ‘so-so’ gesture and the rest of the group busted up laughing once again. 

Later, after several rounds of good-bye hugs, the girls headed for their car, and Vixen lingered behind, telling them to go ahead without her, she’d get her own car. (And then of course, she had to pretend not to see Asia’s knowing wink.) 

“We had a great time, I really...you were fantastic up there,” Vixen said. 

“Thank you for coming,” Courtney said, leaning against the door frame. “Now, don’t get me wrong, all audiences are special, in their own unique way…”

Vixen laughed, reaching out to cup her cheek. 

“But, um…” Courtney trailed off, eyes shining as Vixen’s thumb grazed her skin. 

Vixen leaned in, watching her eyes fall closed before pressing their lips together. The kiss was soft and sweet, and fairly chaste. But when Vixen pulled away, the dreamy expression on Courtney’s face made her heart hammer heavily. 

“I love your hair like this,” Courtney said, admiring the gold woven into her twists. 

“I tried to glam it up for you.” 

“You’re beautiful.” Courtney’s lashes fluttered, arms wrapping around Vixen’s waist. 

“So are you,” Vixen said, hands still cupping her face. “So...I know you must be pretty exhausted...but…you’re also really hot.” 

Courtney bit her lip and leaned in for another kiss, lips trailing down her jaw and then nuzzling into her neck. She heaved a deep sigh. 

“I really want you, but I can barely keep my eyes open,” Courtney admitted, voice muffled against Vixen’s skin.

“So...maybe I should leave, and let you rest.” She trailed her fingers through Courtney’s hair, watching the way her colorful highlights caught the dim light, not yet ready to let go of the moment. 

“Okay,” Courtney agreed, hands still gripping her waist tightly. 

Of course, she ended up staying. By the time they settled into Courtney’s hotel room, they barely had 3 hours. So Vixen just wrapped Courtney into her arms and held her, enjoying this little sliver of affection before she took off again, knowing that it might not be until her tour ended in October that they would see each other again. 

***

Vixen had watched the video twice already, feeling only mildly ashamed as she started it again. Courtney was lying on a yoga mat, post-workout, skin glistening with sweat. She picked up a bottle of water, the video switching to slow motion as she began to pour it all over her face and chest. She batted her wet lashes, blinking the water out of her eyes before looking directly into the camera and slowly licking her lips. The whole video was just silly enough for plausible deniability (especially the caption of “oh no, i spilled!”) and yet unmistakably alluring. And of course, Vixen’s stomach flipped every time she saw that tongue. What was wrong with her?

_VIXEN: Wow. Your last post was…_

_COURTNEY: You like it? ;)_

_VIXEN: You look like a THOT_

_COURTNEY: LOL! Are you slut-shaming me?!_

_VIXEN: I mean..._

_COURTNEY: Wow. And here I thought you were all about empowerment. Smh_

_VIXEN: FINE. Go ahead...live your best slut life._

_COURTNEY: Aww, thx! Xoxo_

***

Vixen was deeply aware of what she said on social media. As much as she wanted to pop off at people (and had, frequently, back in another lifetime, years ago), she knew that her academic credentials required at least a small semblance of self-control. 

So for the most part, she kept her tweets and Instagram comments brief and professional. Almost formal. 

Courtney, however, had no such rules for herself. She basically said any and everything on her mind, commented unabashedly, posted without filters. (Except like, literal filters, which she seemed to enjoy tremendously.) It was both endearing and, at times, deeply concerning for Vixen, for whom privacy was essential. 

For instance, there was the story from Seoul Pride, where she met up with one of her old friends, Adore Delano—the two of them gallivanting around, drinking and laughing and screaming like idiots from a parade float. The whole thing culminated in a video of Courtney in a nightclub, glassy-eyed and extremely proud of herself, literally licking Adore’s face. 

And then when Vixen posted a still from an interview with the Tribune, she immediately responded with nothing but a row of 10 heart-eyed emojis. Which led to Vixen getting hundreds upon hundreds of comments from what she presumed were Courtney’s (very young) followers: unbridled, hysterical excitement the likes of which she had never seen. 

_VIXEN: Um. What...with all due respect...the fuck?_

_COURTNEY: Oh yeah. The shippers. Sorry, I should have warned you._

_VIXEN: I mean. Jesus fucking Christ._

_COURTNEY: We’re OTP #couplegoals now. I’m afraid you have to marry me._

_VIXEN: Seems that way, doesn’t it? BTW where are you? What time is it? Shouldn’t you be sleeping?_

_COURTNEY: Berlin. 4 am. Yes._

_VIXEN: Say goodnight, Courtney_

_COURTNEY: Goodnight Courtney <3 <3 <3 <3 <3_

***

A few days later, after finishing some rather emotional office hours (why every student felt the need to unburden their deepest traumas on Vixen that Wednesday, she didn’t know), she took a much-needed break, sipping a cup of coffee. She saw the picture right away (okay, maybe she had alerts set up by now, whatever)—Courtney curled up in bed with her dog, wearing a fuzzy pink unicorn onesie with turquoise accents and a ridiculous rhinestoned horn. 

_VIXEN: I can’t decide if it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever worn, or like...mortifying_

_COURTNEY: Both!_

_VIXEN: Lol, fair enough_

_COURTNEY: And perfect for cuddling ;)_

_VIXEN: I’ll bet!_

_COURTNEY: Why don’t you send me a pic in your favorite sleepwear?_

_VIXEN: I’m supposed to be a respectable member of the faculty, and you want me to use school wifi for that?_

_COURTNEY: SEND NUDES XXX_

_VIXEN: Lol_

*

About a week later, a box showed up at Vixen’s front door. The return address had Courtney’s name and an unfamiliar return address. She assumed it was fine, but her suspicious nature required a safety check.

_VIXEN: What’s in this package that just showed up at my house?_

_COURTNEY: OMG! That was so fast!! Open it!!_

_VIXEN: So, not a bomb? Please confirm_

_COURTNEY: Lol, no. Open it._

Vixen took the box inside, cutting it open carefully. Inside, there was another box, pink and shiny, with a card on top. The note read, ‘ _To replace your hoodie. Perfect for snuggling. XO, C_.’

She lifted the lid on the pink box, and nestled inside was a fluffy turquoise dragon onesie with iridescent pink scales. It was the silliest thing that Vixen had ever seen. Silly and beautiful and perfect. 

_VIXEN: Damn. I guess fantasies do come true._

_COURTNEY: I hope so..._


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Long distance relationships are tough, but the girls are trying.   
> This chapter: Vixen joins Courtney in LA for the VMAs, and then Courtney surprises her in Chicago. 

Vixen wasn’t sure why she agreed to this. She was going to be so far out of her depth. But when she told Courtney about a lecture she was giving at UCLA in August, a lecture that happened to be the same weekend as the VMAs, Courtney somehow convinced her to come to the awards show as her date. 

“You have to do it,” Asia had informed her, when she heard the hesitation. When she said that she still didn’t know, Mayhem interrupted to give a slightly more forceful message. 

“When the fuck are you gonna have the chance to do something like that again?” she demanded. “Come on, stop overthinking like a little bitch.”

Courtney’s cajoling was more gentle. Logical, even—pointing out that it would be great publicity for her book and her podcast. 

“It could open you up to a whole new audience. Think of the people that you could reach!” 

It was a good point, Vixen conceded. So she agreed, and they casually discussed the logistics. She didn’t really panic until she was in the uber on the way to Courtney’s house. What was she _doing?_ Who did she think she was, showing up at what she was sure would be a gated mansion, to be professionally styled for a red carpet? 

It wasn’t a gated mansion. It was a bungalow tucked into the side of the Hollywood Hills, covered in vines and bursting with plants of every type. After giving her a warm, tight hug, Courtney led her into the living room, where someone (a stylist?) was waiting with racks of clothes. 

“I didn’t know exactly what you’d want, so I had Jo bring you lots of options,” Courtney said. “We should choose now so that they have time to tailor it while we’re at the spa. Jo, can you show her your favorites?” 

Vixen glanced around the room while Jo presented her with wardrobe options and Courtney poured her a glass of lemonade. Without the explosion of clothes, it would have been a cozy, regular living room. Two sofas, some art on the walls. Nothing remotely ostentatious. 

“I like your house,” she told Courtney, accepting the drink gratefully. “It’s...uh...not what I was expecting.”

“No?” Courtney asked, head cocked. 

“No. Well, I mean, it’s like...a normal house,” Vixen explained.

“And you were expecting, what? A spaceship?” Courtney giggled.

“No, like...I don’t know. Some baroque mansion with columns and a butler and big chandeliers, I guess.”

“Hmm, yeah, sounds like my style,” Courtney said, making Vixen laugh.

“Shut up. You’re rich and you love glitter, okay? So I just thought it would be…”

“Tackier?”

“Yes?” Vixen scrunched her face up apologetically. 

“I mean, that’s fair. My first house here was a bit of a Swaravski nightmare. Oh, I really like that one!” Courtney exclaimed, looking at the royal blue dress in Vixen’s hands. “Do you want to try it on? You can use the guest room as a dressing room.” 

Vixen nodded, relieved that disrobing in front of Courtney and Jo (and a random girl she’d just noticed on the patio, pacing around with a phone to her ear) in the broad daylight wasn’t on the agenda. 

After trying on a few choices, Vixen settled on a short, black and turquoise romper - it was fun and sexy, but still classy, and would be comfortable enough to sit around in for hours. Jo was helping her figure out the accessories (with occasional input from Courtney as she pranced around with snacks) when the girl from outside stepped in, carrying Courtney’s fluffy pomeranian under one arm. 

“Okay, everything’s all set at the hotel,” she said matter-of-factly. 

“Vix, that’s Brianna. Yes, I like those shoes!” She nodded approvingly at the bright yellow pumps Vixen was trying. 

“Yeah, hi, sorry. I’m Courtney’s assistant. Brie,” she reached out to give Vixen a firm handshake. 

“Ugh, I still hate the word ‘assistant.’ Can’t we come up with a cooler title for you?” Courtney asked. 

“Sure, that’ll be my top priority,” Brianna replied sarcastically, then barreled rapidly through the day’s plans. “So, after we wrap up here, we’ll head for the hotel. Massages and manicures at the spa while we set up hair and makeup. We should really start by 2 at the _lastest_ to make sure we can manage something presentable out of...that,” she gestured vaguely in Courtney’s direction with a smirk, everyone laugh, “And then leave at 4 to drive to the theatre and do the red carpet by 4:30 or 5. Then the show, blah blah blah, performance, not my problem, and then we head to Van Nuys for wheels-up at 9. Cool?” 

“When do we eat?” Courtney asked. 

“You’ll have a meal at the spa. You know, in that area by the dipping pool thing?” 

“Oh, okay,” Courtney said. 

“And then obviously we’ll have snacks in the room, and we ordered a bunch of stuff for you to have backstage. Don’t worry, there’ll be plenty of food.” 

“Great.” 

“Um...I have a question,” Vixen said, pausing her perusal of the jewelry table. “Are the hair people gonna be familiar with Black hair?” 

Brie turned toward her with a vague eye roll, asking, “Do I look like a moron to you?” 

Vixen leveled her gaze, not backing down, and answered, “You look like someone who has never worn a protective hairstyle before.” 

“Fair enough,” Brie conceded with a grin. “And don’t worry. We got you good people who are very experienced with protective styles.” 

“Thanks, Brie! Ooh, how about ‘Executive Vice President of Human Logistics’?” Courtney suggested. 

“Whatever makes you happy, girl,” Brianna said tiredly, giving Courtney a salute as she deposited Kylie onto his bed. “I’m gonna go check your suitcases. Or, should I call them ‘transport need satisfaction receptacles’?” 

“Sounds good,” Courtney giggled, and Vixen couldn’t help laughing either. 

“That little cracker is hilarious,” Vixen commented, admiring the row of bangles on her arm.

“I know, right?” Courtney laughed. 

“Hey!” Brianna said, poking her head back in the room, deadpanning, “That was my nickname in prison. Lil Miz Cracker.” 

She grinned, waiting for them all to crack up before disappearing again. 

“Before her,” Courtney confided, “I had this other assistant that my agents found, this nervous kid who told me I was beautiful like 8 thousand times a day, and it was just...excruciating.” 

“The things you’ve overcome,” Vixen said, shaking her head with mock sincerity. “It’s _so_ inspirational.”

Courtney laughed gaily, handing her a pair of earrings to try, which Jo immediately snatched out of her hand. 

“No! Hideous,” they said, handing Vixen a different pair. 

***

In the car to the hotel, Brie asked Vixen if she had a preferred gender for her massage therapist. 

“Well, I kind of like a more gentle massage, so…I mean, not to be discriminatory, but…”

“You want someone with soft lady hands?” Courtney asked, a glint in her eye. 

“Kind of,” Vixen replied, hanging her head in mock shame. 

“Wuss.” 

“You don’t like soft lady hands?” Vixen asked, raising her eyebrows.

“Well I mean...there’s a time and place,” Courtney explained. 

Vixen looked into her glittering green eyes, head tilted, as she continued. 

“For a massage? I like it deep. So as long as they can put some muscle behind it, everything’s good.”

“You’re right, there _is_ a time and a place,” Vixen said lightly, “I occasionally like it deep as well.” 

“Good to know,” Courtney said, giggling delightedly. 

The whole day was strange, an almost out of body experience for Vixen. At times, she felt like she was hovering overhead and watching herself get rubbed and plucked and fluffed and painted. Pampered and catered to on a level she never had before. 

But the red carpet, that was the most surreal experience by far, just a whirlwind of flashes and shouted questions from reporters. Courtney held her hand the entire time, checking in constantly to make sure she was alright, gently directing her where to look and when to pose. 

“My first red carpet was terrifying,” she confessed. “So when you’ve had enough, just tell me.” 

She was relieved, at first, for her relative anonymity. No entertainment reporters would know the academic world, or a political science professor. 

That is, until Courtney put an arm around Vixen’s waist and dragged her right into the spotlight, introducing her to a reporter as “the brilliant author behind the book ‘Beware White Tears.’”

“Oh!” Recognition dawned in the reporter’s eyes as she brushed her bangs away from her face. “This is the unparalleled genius you’ve been tweeting about all year?” 

“Yes ma’am,” Courtney said. “Vixen Taylor.” 

“A pleasure,” she said, extending her hand to Vixen and offering a dazzling white smile. “Shea Coulée.” 

“Nice to meet you,” Vixen said, shaking her hand. She glanced back at Courtney, who was beaming like a sunflower beside her. 

“Shea, you should tell everyone to read her book,” Courtney said, smile growing even bigger as she continued to gush, “And listen to her podcast. She’s so incredibly smart, it’s unreal.”

Shea looked from Courtney to Vixen a few times before asking, “So…what’s the story with you two, then? Are you like, an official thing?” 

“Shh, I’m working on it!” Courtney said, giggling, pulling Vixen towards the theatre. Startling her a second later with an ecstatic shriek of, _“Adore!”_

Vixen wasn’t super familiar with Adore’s music, but she did know her from Courtney’s social media. Apparently a big deal now in the punk rock scene, standing there in what appeared to be the same clothes she’d partied in last night, next to a tall, statuesque, impeccably dressed young redheaded woman. They looked to Vixen to be an absolute mis-match of a couple, Adore’s date classy and serene as Adore squealed and threw her arms around Courtney, the two of them clinging to each other and chattering wildly. 

“Omigod, I love that dress-”

“ _You_ look like a mess. Gigi, why haven’t you-”

“Don’t blame her, I dress myself.”

“How was Prague?”

“Fuckin’ _wild,_ man!” 

“Have you met Vixen?” 

Courtney turned toward Vixen, who was overwhelmed by the whole exchange, and grabbed her hand once again. 

“Vixen, this is Adore, my best friend for life, and her very patient girlfriend, Gigi.” 

“Hi, nice to-” 

“Augh!” Adore shrieked. “Courtney! Did you see the pictures of Jinkx and Alaska’s new kid?” 

“No, what?! When did they...have? Buy? What word are we using?”

“Adopt?” 

“Yeah, that-another kid?” 

Gigi turned to Vixen, sensing her obvious discomfort, and offered a smile. 

“They’re always like this. It’s best just to...ride it out,” Gigi finished with a chuckle. “They’re like toddlers. Eventually they’ll get tired and calm down.” 

“Thanks.” 

Vixen opted to watch the show from the audience, happy that she had Adore and Gigi to sit with. (Well...Gigi, at least. The jury was still out on Adore.) She knew that Courtney would need to focus on her performance, and sitting alone in her dressing room for large chunks of time seemed nerve-wracking. 

But after Courtney’s performance, Brie showed up to escort Vixen backstage. They were only going to have a little time to hang out before Courtney had to leave, getting on a plane to Paris to continue her tour almost immediately after the show. 

Courtney was in the midst of changing when Vixen knocked gently on her door. It was quite a look...track pants and Ugg slippers on the bottom, and a metal corset on top. Brie was helping her out of the corset, and though she didn’t seem remotely self-conscious about being topless, Vixen averted her eyes, waiting until she’d slipped on a t-shirt before addressing her directly. 

“You were incredible tonight,” she said honestly. 

“Really?” Courtney asked, perching on the arm of the sofa. “I felt like it was a bit of a mess. I could _kill_ Mikey.”

“Who’s Mikey?”

“That dancer who went the wrong way during the second verse? I saw them pounding shots, I think he was hammered. Ugh.”

Vixen smiled softly. 

“It’s adorable that you think I was watching the backup dancers.” 

In an instant, Courtney’s demeanor changed from professional and annoyed to coy and flirtatious, simpering like a schoolgirl. 

“Hmm...who were you watching then?

Brie had slipped away by now, leaving the two of them alone in the dressing room. Vixen stood and walked toward her. 

“The camera guys, of course,” Vixen quipped. 

Courtney giggled, reaching out for her and pulling her close. 

“Oh yeah?” she murmured. 

Vixen nodded slowly, then smiled again and shook her head. She slid her hands around Courtney’s waist, gazing unblinking into her hooded green eyes. She leaned in slowly, almost excruciatingly so, pausing for a few moments to enjoy the way her chest rose and fell rapidly, heart pounding in anticipation. 

When she finally brushed their lips together, she could feel the hitch in Courtney’s breath, a whimper escaping from the back of her throat. Courtney cupped her cheeks with both hands, pulling her in closer, deepening the kiss, coaxing her mouth open. 

Vixen followed her, dazed, onto the sofa, where she dove head-first into the moment, finally able to just enjoy each other for the first time in months. She quickly lost track of time and space, thinking only of the girl in her arms, how soft and delicious she was...how she made Vixen feel so _wanted_. 

She kissed down Courtney’s torso, lifting her t-shirt to trail her lips gently over the angry marks from that horrible corset. She began to pull off her bottoms, pausing just before sliding them over her hips to make sure it was okay. Courtney lifted up slightly, watching Vixen through lidded eyes, legs spreading open once her panties were flung to the side. Vixen paused, breathing her in, making her shiver with anticipation as she spread her thighs even more. 

Vixen cleared her throat, fingers dancing up the inside of her thighs. 

“Remember, I’m pretty...new at this,” Vixen said, and Courtney nodded vigorously. 

“I know, I know. Don’t worry.” Her hand wound its way into Vixen’s hair. 

“Okay.” Vixen leaned forward, lips barely brushing against her. 

As a soft sigh left Courtney’s lips, Vixen took a deep breath. Her desire to satisfy, to live up to expectations, momentarily overtaken by nerves, until she steeled herself. _Just French kiss her pussy, you idiot. Stop freaking out and lick her until she comes._

Courtney was shockingly easy to please, as it turned out. A hand in Vixen’s hair, guiding her, and breathy, whimpered instructions were all she needed to begin unlocking the mysteries of her body. 

“Harder, harder…please…” 

Vixen didn’t know why she was surprised. From that first tweet, Courtney had been utterly direct with her. And even their first time together, she didn’t hold back at all from saying what she wanted. But somehow, the shameless way she buried Vixen’s face into her pussy, rutting against her, moaning out commands...it all just made everything so much hotter. 

“What else?” Vixen asked, raising her eyes to take in Courtney’s flushed cheeks, eyes rolled back in her head. “Tell me what else you need…” 

“Pinch my nipples,” Courtney gasped, “And... _yes,_ god...suck harder.” 

Courtney arched up, thighs now pressing against Vixen’s ears, muffling the sounds when she started to moan. Vixen had a brief concern of “what if someone _hears_ ” before deciding that she didn’t fucking care. All she wanted was to make Courtney come—a task that was looking increasingly likely as she writhed and shook in her arms. 

She flicked her tongue against Courtney’s clit, shocked at how much she was enjoying the whole experience. Nerves melted away; the only thing on her mind was the girl pressed up against her tongue. 

“I love how wet you get,” Vixen said, voice low, moving her mouth to nip lightly at her thigh. 

“I love how wet you _make_ me,” Courtney panted, then arched up, whimpering. “Baby...oh, god…” 

Something about being called _baby_ in this context gave Vixen a deep, unfeminist thrill; she had to pause and catch her breath, slightly dizzy with the embarrassing, intoxicating thought of being called a _good girl_. She panted against Courtney’s thigh, felt her quivering on the edge before going back to her clit, tongue circling her gently, coaxing out a broken moan. 

God, she was a mess. A beautiful, shuddering mess. Vixen hummed against her, sucking on her clit, soft at first and then harder and harder. 

“Fuck, that’s so good, baby, keep going…” 

Courtney groaned, hips rolling faster, and Vixen complied, listening to her moans, the best music she’d heard all night. She kept sucking, didn’t stop until Courtney’s muscles went slack, the only sounds coming from her satiated little whimpers. 

“Did I do okay?” Vixen asked, looking up at her almost timidly. 

“You…” Courtney lifted an arm weakly to caress her cheek. “You are perfect. Come here.” 

Vixen crawled forward, squishing herself in beside Courtney on the sofa. And as Courtney wrapped herself around Vixen’s body, pulling a blanket from the back of the couch to cover them both, Vixen found herself buying in completely, at least for the moment, to the delusional fantasy of _them_. Of what they could be. Of what a shared life would look like. 

She was rudely snapped back into reality when Brie opened the door, an uncharacteristically apologetic look on her face. Vixen sprang away from Courtney on the sofa like a guilty teenager, then immediately felt stupid. 

“Sorry,” Brie said, “but we gotta get to the plane.” 

“Okay. Just give us twenty minutes?” Courtney asked, a resigned note in her voice. 

“You can have ten. Setting a timer.” Brie closed the door firmly. 

Courtney turned to Vixen, who smiled sheepishly. 

“I’m not really sure why I panicked. Lil Cracker just freaks me out.” 

“Well…” Courtney appeared to ponder this for a few moments before reaching out, fingers seeking out Vixen’s zipper. “She did give us ten minutes…” 

Vixen shook her head, chuckling. 

“It’s fine, don’t worry about that. I’m too paranoid about another interruption.” 

“But you took care of me. It’s only fair.” Courtney trailed her fingers up Vixen’s arm. 

“Yeah, and you worked very hard today,” Vixen said, and off Courtney’s distressed look, wrapped an arm around her again, adding, “You can owe me one.” 

“Well...I guess in that case, I should probably put my knickers back on.” 

Vixen laughed, picking her panties up off the floor and handing them over.

“Ugh. It’s so annoying that I have to take off so quickly,” Courtney said. After slipping the panties on, she leaned her head on Vixen’s shoulder. “Do you want me to text Adore? She and Gigi are waiting for you to take you to the after-party, so-” 

“No, it’s fine,” Vixen said. “I don’t care about the after-party.” 

“You sure? Because you can totally go. I’m sure it’ll be fun.” 

“I’d rather just stay with you until you have to leave,” she admitted. “We don’t have much time, so…” 

“Yeah?” The smile that lit up Courtney’s face was enough to make Vixen’s heart burst with joy. 

“Mmmhmm.” 

“Well...you could ride with us to the airport. If you want.” 

“Sounds good,” Vixen said, reaching for her hand. 

“And don’t worry, I won’t do anything naughty with other people around,” Courtney promised. “We can just...sit in the backseat and hold hands and gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes.” 

“That was my whole plan,” Vixen giggled, leaning forward to plant a kiss on Courtney’s cheek.

***

Vixen had to admit that for once, she posted a picture with an understated, tasteful caption. It was just them on the red carpet, which said, “VMAs with my favorite writer.” 

_VIXEN: Classy caption there_

_COURTNEY: That’s not what I wanted to say_

_VIXEN: ?_

_COURTNEY: Guess ;)_

_VIXEN: You’re Too Much_

_COURTNEY: I’m the perfect amount, actually._

_VIXEN: Cocky too, huh?_

_COURTNEY: It’s also possible that I’m delirious after performing and then taking a 10 hour flight._

_VIXEN: I read that as “delicious”_

_COURTNEY: Oh yeah?_

_VIXEN: You wouldn’t have been wrong..._

_COURTNEY: So I’ve been told_

_COURTNEY: (and cocky)_

_COURTNEY: And I miss you already_

_VIXEN: <3_

_COURTNEY: <3 <3 <3_

***

As much as Courtney loved performing, there were times when she had to admit how lonely tour life could be. First of all, there wasn’t a single person with her that wasn’t on payroll. And while she liked them all, there was something a little depressing about being surrounded 24/7 by people that were paid to be around you and cater to your whims and humor every single thing you said. 

She did a reasonably okay job of keeping in touch with her friends, but with the time differences, it was hard to get on the same page. Except for Vixen, who always made sure she was available at some point in the evening. They’d often just text back and forth, but more and more, Courtney’d been convincing Vixen to FaceTime. And seeing her smile, looking into her eyes, hearing her laugh, just made everything infinitely better. 

At first, when she was in Europe, it was late at night, well after Courtney’s show had wrapped for the evening, once she was safely tucked into bed in whatever hotel she was staying. Curled up with her phone or her computer, laughing until her sides hurt at Vixen’s impressions of her grandmother or her crazy cousins. Or, once the tour moved to Asia and Australia, it was in the morning, after she’d finished meditating and before she headed out to meet her trainer. She’d sit on a terrace or in the hotel room with a cup of tea while Vixen sipped an evening glass of wine, head resting on her hands as she listened to Vixen talk about everything from university politics to her chaotic childhood. 

Either way, it quickly became her favorite part of the day. It was strange. They’d only met in person three times, but Courtney soon felt like Vixen knew her better than anyone ever had. And as for Vixen—she was admittedly a little guarded most of the time, but Courtney found her to be wonderfully candid. She told stories about her chaotic childhood and her troubled teens. How confused she’d been during most of her college years. Courtney knew all about her large extended family; she was sure she’d be able to recognize them all on sight, based on Vixen’s vivid descriptions and hilarious impersonations. 

And then sometimes, when Courtney caught her in a certain mood, or maybe after a second glass of wine, the conversations would turn into something else entirely. Whispered confessions in the dark, voices hoarse, faces flushed with nervous excitement. It never went too far, but it was usually enough to get Courtney good and worked up, close enough that a few seconds with a vibrator after they hung up was enough to finish her off. It was enough that Courtney had lost any desire to be with anyone else, even when she ached with need. She would take a 2D image of Vixen on her screen over a real-life random hookup any day. 

Of course, as good as it was, there was always a degree of uncertainty. There were conversations that they probably should be having...what exactly is their relationship, where is it going, are they exclusive? But it had been so long since Courtney liked anyone as much as Vixen, and she had a vague fear that bringing that up too soon would scare her off, so for now, she just dealt with the uncertainty as best she could. After all, the flip side of uncertainly was potential, and that was pretty exciting. 

By the time October rolled around, Courtney longed to be home in her own bed, surrounded by her own things. Just the basic familiar comforts of home. When it was time to fly back to the states, she had to stop in New York for some press and a few meetings, and then finally, she was free to return to LA. But at the last minute, on a whim, she decided to make another stop first. 

***

Vixen had been putting the October symposium together for months. She’d reached out far and wide, planning lectures, panels, open forums, and agendas for the break-out groups over two days. There were a million moving parts, and million things on Vixen’s checklist, a million question marks and potential disasters. 

But in all of the planning, never in Vixen’s mind did she imagine a scenario where she’d walk out to the podium on Saturday morning and see Courtney fucking Act sitting in the front row. With a pair of reading glasses and a goddamn notebook, rainbow streaks tucked into a librarian-style bun. 

Fortunately, after a momentary stumble that she hoped no one besides her noticed, she was able to recover and get on with the agenda. During the first break, she beelined straight for Courtney, whose face lit up as she approached. Courtney jumped from her seat, throwing her arms around Vixen’s shoulders and pulling her in for a tight embrace. 

“Hi...this is incredible!” 

“I’m glad you...think...sorry, what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be on a plane to LA right now?” 

“LA can wait,” Courtney said, pulling back to look into her eyes. “And I wanted to surprise you. Was that a terrible idea?” 

“No, just...unexpected,” Vixen replied with a grin. “You threw me off a little bit.” 

“I’m sorry, I should have told you,” Courtney said, chagrined. “I wasn’t actually sure I’d make it in time, my flight from New York was late, and-”

“I’m glad you’re here.” 

“You are?” Courtney squeezed Vixen’s hands, and Vixen nodded, kissing her softly on the cheek. 

“Yeah. But now I have to go back and take care of things, so-”

“Of course! I’ll be invisible, I promise. I just really wanted to hear your lecture,” she said, eyes shining. 

“I hope you’re not bored,” Vixen chuckled softly, shaking her head. She still couldn’t quite believe that Courtney would be there listening the whole time. But fortunately, there was no time to stress about it, so she just walked back to the stage to keep the program going. 

“Impossible!” Courtney called after her, settling back into her seat. 

***

“Go back. Play that part again,” Vixen insisted, tossing Courtney a wicked smirk. 

“Are you serious?” 

“Yeah, it’s a really important cinematic moment.” 

Courtney giggled, lifting the remote. 

Vixen sighed happily, leaning against her shoulder. After Courtney had surprised her at the symposium earlier, they’d discussed a handful of date night possibilities before realizing that all they really wanted was just to curl up in front of a movie in Courtney’s hotel room, basking in the simple pleasure of finally being in the same room with no time pressure, no obligations, nobody standing by to interrupt. So they’d made a quick stop at Vixen’s apartment for a few essentials, and then headed straight to the hotel, getting into comfy clothes and cuddling up in front of the TV. 

Partly as a joke, Vixen had selected _Glimmer_ for them to watch, and she was currently making Courtney replay the shot where “Princess Lucie” first took off her helmet. It was an absolute cliché: blonde waves spilling over her shoulders in slow motion in the golden sunset, romantic music soaring on the soundtrack. 

“Yeahhh, that’s the stuff,” Vixen leered at the screen as real-life Courtney laughed beside her. “Again!” 

“I’ll do you one better,” Courtney giggled, swinging a leg over her to straddle her on the bed. “How about a live show?”

“I’m not gonna say no to that,” Vixen told her, grinning, settling back against the pillows. 

Courtney gathered up her hair before slowly releasing it, shaking it out, accompanied by lashes fluttering and lip biting. 

Vixen watched the whole over-the-top performance before sighing and shaking her head sadly. 

“Real life just never lives up to the movies, does it?”

“Hey!” Courtney scoffed, feigning offense, then leaned forward to brush her lips against Vixen’s temple, murmuring into her ear. “You sure about that?” 

“Ummm…I could probably be persuaded to hear a counterpoint...” Vixen trailed her fingers up Courtney’s thighs, smiling up at her. Feeling almost shy as Courtney toyed with the neckline of her top. 

Vixen’s heart fluttered wildly as Courtney pressed a soft kiss to her lips. She sighed into it, savoring the moment as Courtney cradled her face. 

“It feels like it’s been forever,” Vixen murmured, warmth spreading through her chest all the way down to her toes, to the tips of her fingers. She tilted her head slightly to give Courtney easier access to her neck, where she began to layer soft kisses. 

“Next time won’t be so long,” Courtney whispered into her skin. “I promise.” 

“Good…” 

A soft whimper left Vixen’s lips as Courtney’s kisses turned from gentle and teasing to deep and hot, tongue trailing across her collarbone, moving to the other side of her neck, sucking on her pulse point. Her fingers dug into Courtney’s hips, arching up against her. 

The movie still played in the background, neither of them noticing that Princess Lucie had begun to sing one of her solos until the music swelled for the chorus, startling them both. 

_“THE LIGHT SHIIIIIIIIINES WITHIN MY HEAAAAAAAAAAART!”_

“Omigod,” Courtney breathed, breaking away from Vixen and turning around to switch off the TV, telling her Princess alter ego to, “Shut _up!_ ”

Vixen giggled, trying to catch her breath as Courtney turned back to her, face immediately softening into a dreamy expression as she gazed down at her, making her feel improbably special. She placed her wrists gently on Vixen’s shoulders, a smile tugging at her mouth. 

“What?” Vixen asked. 

“I just can’t believe we’re finally together again.”

“ _You_ can’t believe? I’m in bed with a bona fide princess.” 

“I’m not a real princess,” Courtney reminded her. 

“Could’ve fooled me.” 

Courtney giggled, hips rolling just enough to make her whimper. 

“How about tonight, you’re the princess?” Courtney murmured, and Vixen felt that dizzying thrill again, the one that she barely ever allowed herself to indulge in. At least, not outside the safe space of her own secret dreams. 

She tried to come up with an answer, but her mind seemed to go blank, and so Courtney took her face into her hands, thumbs tracing over her cheekbones, whisper-soft. 

“What do you say, princess?” 

Vixen couldn’t hold back anymore, cheeks blazing hot as she bit back an embarrassing noise. Courtney sat up, looking both a little surprised and incredibly pleased by her enthusiasm. 

“You know...have something that I think...you might like...” Courtney began, biting her lip. 

“You have a lot of things I like,” Vixen stated hoarsely. 

Courtney’s smile deepened. She pressed a kiss to Vixen’s temple and then rolled away, digging through a suitcase on the floor. Finally, she produced what she was looking for: a pink canvas bag with a zipper down the side. She placed it between them on the bed, encouraging Vixen to look. 

“Anything in there...interesting to you?” 

Vixen unzipped the bag curiously, then after a glance inside, looked back up at Courtney, scandalized, stomach twisting with excitement. 

“No?” Courtney asked. 

“No. I mean, yeah,” Vixen said. “I’m...I think it could be fun. I just—”

“It doesn’t have to be today,” Courtney said, reaching for her hand. 

“What if I wanted it to be today?” Vixen asked, tilting her head coyly. 

“Then I’d say, your wish is my command.” Courtney kissed her softly. “Princess.” 

Vixen felt her heart pick up speed as she melted against the kiss, excitement building inside her. Before she lost herself completely, she pulled away, trying to catch her breath. 

“I’m gonna go get ready.” 

“Okay.” Courtney placed a kiss to the inside of her wrist before releasing her. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Courtney surprised Vixen in Chicago and made a mysterious proposal.  
> This chapter: Some dress-up, a little sexy fun, and a possible big step.

Courtney approached the bathroom door apprehensively. Vixen had been in there for an awfully long time—well past when the shower had turned off—and she was starting to get concerned. She knocked gently. 

“Hey Vix...is everything okay?” 

_“Yeah! Sorry! I just um...I’m trying something and it’s...uhhhh…”_

“Do you need anything?” Courtney asked. 

_“No. No, I’m okay. Just like, a few more minutes.”_

“Okay, no rush.” 

Courtney padded back to the bed, smoothing down the sheets. She glanced at the nightstand, wondering if she should put on the strap ahead of time, and deciding against it. It could be a bit of an alarming visual, and she didn’t want to freak Vixen out. But should she wear something? She glanced at her reflection in the mirror on the wall. Full nudity seemed like the way to go, right?

Courtney looked up at the sound of a soft voice saying, _“Um…”_

“Are you alright?” Courtney stood up, walking towards the bathroom, brow furrowed. 

_“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. I just don’t know if this worked. I might look a little silly.”_

Courtney smiled, putting on hand on the door. 

“Are you wearing that dragon onesie?” 

Vixen’s laugh made Courtney smile even deeper. Even muffled through the door, it was her favorite sound. 

_“No, but I’m wearing...a new thing.”_

“Are you gonna show me?” 

_“I’m deciding.”_

“Okay. Take your time…” Courtney walked back to the bed. She wasn’t sure what Vixen’s hesitation was, but she certainly didn’t want to pressure her. 

It was strange, for Courtney, to be this invested in a relationship. For years, her love life had consisted of short-lived flings—not in a sordid way, at least not usually. They were often beautiful adventures, real connections with people that she treasured and appreciated. But they never seemed to last. If she was lucky, and she often was, they would develop into a lasting friendship. (Adore made fun of her, sometimes asking if she was the one friend Courtney had that she’d never fucked, and if so, why the fuck not?)

But thinking about it, she actually couldn’t remember the last time she’d been this infatuated with anyone. Even her relationship with Bianca, at the time so all-consuming that it had taken over her entire life, felt like a distant memory. After all, they’d been friends for much longer than they’d ever been together, and it was a friendship that Courtney valued tremendously. It was rare for her to be in New York without at least meeting her ex for coffee or lunch. She’d even, against all odds, become friendly with Fame. 

Vixen was different. She knew that, but this long-distance situation was frustrating as hell. It was probably the reason why it had taken so painfully long to build up a decent amount of trust between them. And what Courtney wanted at this point, more than anything else, was for Vixen to trust her. She could see the vulnerability, flickering beneath the surface of her eyes, and it made her heart ache. 

_“Okay. I’m...coming out.”_

“Okay, I’m here.” Courtney sat up straighter, watching the door creak open slowly. 

When Vixen finally emerged, the first thing she said was, “Don’t laugh.” 

“Wow…” Courtney breathed, taking her in appreciatively. 

Courtney’s eyes looked her up and down slowly, wandering over every inch of her body. She was wearing a sheer, powder-blue nightie with intricately embroidered lace cups and a flowing chiffon skirt. Her warm brown skin glowed in the lamplight, gold highlighter shimmering on her cheekbones and shoulders, and her hair was half up, soft twists piled on top of her head. Her makeup was what had probably taken the most time—dark eyes carefully lined and shadowed, plum-colored lips full and glossy, sculpted cheeks defined even more than usual. The whole effect took Courtney’s breath away, made her stammer out a repeated, “ _wow_.” 

“Do you like it?” Vixen asked, though the expression on Courtney’s face must have told her the answer. 

“You are so beautiful,” Courtney said, looking deep into her eyes. “Come here…” 

Vixen adjusted the straps on her nightie as she approached, clearly a little bashful about this new ensemble. Courtney gazed up at her, running a hand up her firm thigh to the ruffled hem. A pair of panties with delicate matching lace was visible through the skirt. 

“It’s not a very empowering statement, is it?” Vixen asked. 

“Well. We could probably have a long discussion about that. Why feminine things feel disempowered…” Courtney looked up at her, one eyebrow raised, teasing lightly, “...Is that what you want?” 

“Not especially.” Vixen shook her head demurely. 

Courtney leaned back on her elbows, gaze still fixed on Vixen’s eyes, a satisfied smile on her lips. 

“Spin around, princess,” she commanded playfully.

“Come on…” Vixen let out an exasperated chuckle. 

“Please, baby? Be a good girl for me.” 

Vixen bit her lip, dark eyes smoldering at Courtney, then finally turning around slowly, giving Courtney a good look at her ass. 

“Mmm…” 

“You like that?” Vixen asked, tossing a coy look over her shoulder, quickly getting into the spirit of things. 

“Uh huh,” Courtney said. 

Vixen giggled, twirling and preening until Courtney reached out to grab her hand, pulling her onto the bed and rolling over on top of her. Vixen let her take change, surrendering completely, hands laying palm-up beside her head. 

“You are so...fucking...pretty…” Courtney punctuated her words with kisses along Vixen’s long, graceful neck, lips then trailing over her collarbone. She could feel the heat on her smooth skin, pulse quickening. Her hand reached under the skirt to trace the scalloped edge of her panties. 

Vixen made an almost undetectable noise, the faintest little whimper, as Courtney slipped the tip of her finger just under the lace, stroking her softly, watching her lashes flutter. 

“Do you have any idea, how beautiful you are?” Courtney asked, nuzzling into her cheek. A slight scoff from Vixen made her pause, lifting her head to search her eyes. “What?” 

“No, it’s just...you say that about everyone.” 

“What are you—” Courtney started to argue, but after a moment, she stopped. She sort of saw where Vixen was coming from. It was common on social media for her to reply to comments, calling people _stunning, gorgeous, literal goddess, perfect angel_...Courtney didn’t mean to be disingenuous, but she found that social media was just full of a lot of hyperbole, and faint praise was often taken like an insult. 

“You literally think every human is beautiful,” Vixen laughed. “Actually, scratch that. Every pet or flower or picture of the sky or whatever... _breathtaking_." 

“But...that’s just social media,” Courtney told her. 

“Are you saying you _lie_ to your _fans?_ ” Vixen’s eyes grew comically large. 

Courtney scrunched up her face. 

“Will you just let me compliment you?” she whined. 

“Sorry,” Vixen said. “Go ahead...I’m _beautiful._ ” 

“Yes,” Courtney said immediately. “Insanely, staggeringly beautiful.” 

Vixen didn’t reply to that. Simply swallowed as Courtney slipped one of the straps down her shoulder. 

“And in this? You’re an angel.” Courtney smiled, aware that she was pushing it, taking the eyeroll in stride. “Pretty as a picture.” 

Vixen opened her mouth to respond, but seemed to change her mind, pressing her full lips together. Courtney trailed a hand down over her breasts, fingering her nipple through the lace, watching her arch up. 

“A living doll,” Courtney added. She untied the ribbons on the side of her panties, pulling away the flimsy material to stroke her. She loved the way her eyes went soft as she finally submitted, the way the tension seemed to dissolve, her whole body warm and pliant. 

“Alright, alright, alright,” Vixen conceded with a sigh, arching up into her hands.

Courtney continued to lavish her with praise, whispering into her skin, determined to say it over and over until Vixen’s very cells believed it. _Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful…_

***

It was difficult, at first, for Vixen to accept this kind of coddling from Courtney, as much as she wanted to. Hell, she’d been the one to buy the outfit after seeing it in a shop window a month ago. And she was the one who put it on tonight. So there was no denying that she was looking for _some_ kind of attention. 

It was just that it felt a little wrong to be spoiled and indulged, exactly the kind of infantilizing patriarchal bullshit she always fought against—but, she had to admit, wrong in such an intoxicating way that she found herself addicted. And that, maybe, was the worrying part. How much she loved letting go, someone else being in charge for once. Feeling soft and pretty and cared for. And then the next thought: why _shouldn’t_ she? Why couldn’t she be safe and protected, for once? Why were these urges so shameful to her? 

So she was slowly accepting her new reality—or at least making a concerted effort. And of course, the adoration Courtney heaped upon her felt incredible. The way she touched her, so gently it was as if she thought Vixen would shatter. As unfamiliar as that was, Vixen found herself sinking into the deliciousness of it, the radical act of allowing herself to be worshipped. 

The sweet, tender kisses soon turned heated, and she arched up into Courtney’s touch, body thrumming with need. Courtney’s mouth was traveling down her torso, the gauzy chiffon fabric pushed up, hot tongue lapping at her heated skin, lower and lower, finally running along the shaft of her dick. Vixen shivered and moaned as Courtney took her deep into her mouth, fingers wrapped around her thighs. Her chest rose and fell rapidly, heart hammering. 

“Court…” she tugged on her blonde hair, feeling herself getting close and wanting to save it. 

Courtney lifted her sleepy eyes, lips wet and swollen as the head of Vixen’s dick slipped from her mouth. Vixen groaned at the sight, but forced her attention to the nightstand. 

“I just don’t wanna come yet.” 

“Were you close?” Courtney cooed. 

“Yeah. You have a very talented mouth.” Vixen touched it, fingers rubbing against her bottom lip. 

“So you don’t want me to keep going?” Courtney teased. She lowered her head again, eyes dancing. 

“No!” Vixen rolled away, laughing. “Can you pass me the lube?” 

“Sure.” Courtney picked up the bottle, a sexy smile on her face as she asked, “Want me to help?” 

“Maybe next time,” Vixen said, heat creeping into her cheeks. 

“Fair enough.” 

Courtney passed her the bottle, then stood up to slip on the harness, which looked like a pair of black boy-cut panties. 

“I have sexier ones, but this is the most functional,” Courtney explained, pushing a purple dildo through the ring, adeptly putting together all of the parts like some kind of sex toy lego master. Vixen found herself wondering what on earth could possibly be sexier than this, Courtney standing there topless in nothing but briefs and a purple dick, her blonde hair, still laced with those fading rainbow highlights, spilling over her shoulders in beachy waves. 

“Functional is important,” Vixen stated wryly as Courtney joined her back on the bed. 

“Do you want to keep this on, princess?” Courtney asked, fingering the bottom of her nightie. 

“Um…kinda?” Why did everything about this situation cause Vixen’s cheeks to burn in embarrassment? But she did like the nightie. In spite of her protestations, her initial discomfort, it made her feel pretty and feminine and dainty. 

“You should…” Courtney leaned forward to kiss her, a brush of lips, the dildo pressing into Vixen’s thigh and making her heart race even faster. 

She pushed Courtney onto her back, pouring a generous amount of lube into her hand and then spreading it over the toy. This, at least, was something she’d done before, and it must have shown. Courtney gazed up at her through heavy-lidded green eyes, which widened slightly as Vixen swung a leg over her, hovering on her hands and knees. 

“I think it’s easier if I’m on top. Is that okay?” 

“Anything you want, princess,” Courtney said, arms sliding around her waist, causing a rush of butterflies to fill Vixen’s chest, the pulsing ache to intensify, and suddenly she couldn’t wait a second longer. 

Vixen reached down, guiding the slick dildo as she slowly lowered herself onto it. For a moment, Vixen felt like it was her first time, gasping as she sat down all the way. 

“Fuck.” 

“Are you okay, baby?” Courtney’s hands ran up and down her thighs, stroking her soothingly as she adjusted to the fullness inside of her. 

“Yeah.” Vixen swallowed, waiting patiently for Courtney to start thrusting. 

To her surprise, though, she was in no hurry. She kissed the corner of Vixen’s mouth, fingers sliding up her body, pulling down the cups of her nightie to expose her small tits, cool air making Vixen shiver. 

Courtney smiled lazily and lifted herself up onto her elbows, hot mouth seeking the over-sensitive nubs, sucking on her nipples as her hips began to roll. 

Vixen rocked back against her, whimpering with pleasure. She offered no resistance when Courtney pushed her backwards, laying her down gently, licking at her collarbone, adjusting their position so that she could thrust faster and deeper. Her hands were warm through the thin chiffon fabric of her nightie, holding her as if she was so small and fragile. 

“Is that good, princess?” 

Vixen reached up, clutching a handful of blonde hair and bringing Courtney’s face in close, whispering, “Uh huh.” 

“What about this?” 

Vixen gasped as low vibrations began. Unable to respond with anything more than a nod, she bit back a moan. Kisses were pressed along her jaw, hips now pumping rapidly. The vibrations increased in intensity until she was shaking, on the edge, tears collecting in her eyes. 

For a second, Courtney slowed down to an excruciating pace, panting, and then a tongue invaded her mouth, deep and messy kisses, hips picking up speed again, Courtney’s tits brushing against her nipples with every thrust. 

Vixen moaned, so close now she could taste it, her entire body like a live wire, tingling heat traveling through her veins. And then Courtney took Vixen’s dick into her hands, stroking smoothly and rapidly, thumb over the tip sending sparks straight up her spine. It took only seconds for her to unravel, eyes squeezed shut, seeing nothing but white-hot stars. 

When she finally collapsed, gulping for air, skin glistening with sweat, she didn’t know if it was seconds or hours that had gone by. Courtney lay on her side, also panting, hair plastered to her forehead. Vixen lifted her hand to weakly touch her cheek. 

“That was...Jesus...” she breathed. 

Courtney smirked at her, bringing her fingers to her mouth to lick them clean.

“Fuck, you taste so good…” 

It was enough to make a residual ripple of pleasure shiver through Vixen’s body. She pulled her in for a sticky kiss, groaning slightly.

***

It would have been hard for Courtney to come up with a hotter image than the sight of Vixen, sprawled out on her back, utterly sated, eyes barely open. She still wore her pretty little nightgown, although it was a bit of a mess now, wrinkled and stained, one of the cups torn, both straps dangling off her shoulders. Courtney ran her hand up under the skirt, short nails scratching up Vixen’s ribcage. 

“Was that any good for you?” Vixen asked her sleepily. “Or was it just for me?” 

“You’re kidding, right?” Courtney chuckled, squeezing her hip, legs tangling together. “I came twice.” 

“Oh. I mean, good.” Vixen lowered her eyes, looking adorably bashful. “I should probably have known that, huh?” 

“I guess you were otherwise occupied,” Courtney said with a grin. 

“Mmm,” was all she seemed to manage. Her eyes fluttered shut with a soft sigh, and Courtney wanted to melt at the sight of it. 

She nuzzled into her neck, inhaling her scent—shea butter and just a hint of grapefruit. Courtney couldn’t resist licking up the hollow of her throat, loving the breathy little whimper that escaped as she did. 

Courtney laid a head down beside her, gathering her into her arms and pulling her close. She had almost fallen asleep herself when a sweet, sleepy voice roused her back to consciousness. 

“How did you know?”

“Know what?” Courtney asked, eyes opening. 

Vixen cleared her throat, shifting slightly in her arms. “That I’d like that...princess stuff.”

“I just saw your reaction when I said it the first time,” Courtney said.

“Oh.”

“Also…”

“Yeah?”

“When I was listening to you today…” Courtney paused, taking a moment to consider what she was saying before continuing. “You’re so incredibly smart, and commanding. And compassionate. You fight so hard to make the world a better place.” 

“Trying to fuck the brains out of my head so I can chill for once?” 

“No,” Courtney laughed. “It’s just that...okay, even with me, you’ve been so generous. And taught me so much. I think sometimes probably without meaning to. And it just made me wonder if anyone ever takes care of you. Because everyone needs that sometimes.” 

Vixen turned her head. Her brown eyes were glassy, showing that softness that Courtney knew was rare and precious. Knew that she was privileged to experience. She stroked a thumb over Vixen’s cheek, brushed their lips together in the sweetest kiss she could muster. 

***

“Good morning,” Courtney said, finger trailing lightly down Vixen’s arm as her eyes fluttered open. 

“Hi.” Vixen bit her lip, realizing that they hadn’t spent a full night together since their first time back in February. She sat up, self-consciousness flooding her mind—about her breath, the sheen of sweat on her upper lip, the torn nightie she still wore. She looked over at Courtney, sprawled out on her stomach, a sheet draped loosely over her hips, and let out a surprised gasp. There were angry-looking red scratches down her back and across her shoulders. When had Vixen even done that? And how? She’d trimmed her nails short just a few days earlier. 

“What’s wrong?” Courtney asked, reaching for her. Apparently unconcerned with simple human problems like morning breath and possible B.O. 

“Your back. You have marks,” Vixen fretted, touching one of the scratches lightly. 

“Oh yeah. You’re a bit of a scratchy little kitten,” Courtney giggled. 

“Does it hurt?” 

“No. Don’t worry.” Courtney seemed to sense her anxiety, sitting up and taking her hand. She pressed a kiss to her shoulder, asking, “How would you feel about some room service? Maybe some mimosas?” 

Vixen looked over at her, a smile tugging at her lips before realization hit her like a wet towel in the face. “Shit.” 

“What?” Courtney asked, brow creased with worry. 

“No, nothing bad, I just...I was supposed to meet Monet and Asia for brunch. I forgot to cancel.” 

“You don’t have to cancel,” Courtney told her. 

“Right, but what are you...unless, do you want to come?” Vixen asked tentatively. 

“Sure!” Courtney said brightly. “That would be great. They’re both so awesome.” 

“As awesome as me?” Vixen asked, twirling a lock of Courtney’s hair around her finger. 

“No one is as awesome as you.” 

***

“That one, the yellow spine, Alvarez. Yeah, I love that author,” Courtney directed, watching Vixen take the book down from the high shelf with a pleased smile, brazenly checking out her ass in the tight, acid-washed jeans, how her leather vest rose up to reveal the sexy curve of her back. 

They were in Vixen’s favorite bookshop, a lovely stop on their way to brunch. Courtney’s arms were already full of books that Vixen had recommended, and now she was trying to return the favor. 

Vixen looked at the book, confirming that she hadn’t read it before, and then nodded. She looked back up at Courtney, who still had that little smile on her face. 

“What are you grinning about?” 

“It’s just really hot. How tall you are,” Courtney said, leaning against her with a giggle. 

“You think?” Vixen slipped an arm around her, leading her back towards the register. 

“Uh huh. I bet you can change lightbulbs without a ladder.” 

“I can.”

“Mmm,” Courtney groaned playfully, and Vixen laughed into her hair. 

“You’re such a little weirdo,” she said fondly. 

***

“I have to tell you,” Monet said, lowering her voice conspiratorially. “She’s a little obsessed.” 

“Shut up!” Vixen exclaimed. As usual, her friends were teasing her, trying to get a rise in front of Courtney. 

“Oh yeah?” Courtney rested her chin in her hands. Vixen was struck once again by how beautiful she was, hair piled up in a messy bun, green sweater dress revealing just the perfect amount of cleavage to keep it classy. 

“Yeah, she like...won’t stop talking about you,” Monet explained. “Ever.” 

“It’s a little much,” Asia added. 

“You’re both assholes,” Vixen complained, leaning back in her chair with a pout. 

“Can I tell you a secret?” Courtney asked, eyes sparkling. 

“Go ahead,” Monet said, stealing a bite of Vixen’s waffles. 

“I’m a little obsessed with her too.” 

They both grinned as Vixen let out a scoff. 

“No, you’re a lot obsessed. Bordering on unhealthy,” she proclaimed. 

“Possibly.” Courtney found her hand under the table, brushing her fingers up Vixen’s palm. 

Vixen gave her a sly, sideways look, as she laced their fingers together, biting her lip.

“Ugh,” Monet groaned. “Ya’ll are gross.” 

“Sorry,” Courtney said lightly, eyes not leaving Vixen’s. 

“Here’s the real question,” Asia saying, setting her latte down on the table. “What are your intentions here? Are you gonna make our girl an honest woman?” 

“I-”

“Jesus Asia, knock it off,” Vixen whined. 

“No no, this is a valid question. I, for one, am very curious to hear the answer,” Monet added. 

“Well, my intentions are, um…” Courtney glanced at Vixen briefly, then returned her attention to Asia. “Whatever she wants.” 

“That’s a little vague,” Monet said, shaking her head. 

Vixen threw up her hands in exasperation, signaling to the waiter for another round of much-needed bellinis. 

“I mean, we don’t live in the same city,” Courtney defended herself, taking a delicate sip of tea before adding, “...yet.” 

Asia and Monet both squealed happily, causing her to start laughing. 

“So what you’re saying is…” Monet leaned forward on her elbows, brown eyes sparkling. “Someday, you think you _will_ be in the same city?” 

“Well yeah, of course,” Courtney said. “I mean, long-distance is not the most ideal scenario for building…” 

Vixen swallowed, realized that she was holding her breath waiting for Courtney to finish. 

“Building…?” Asia prompted, head tilted curiously. 

Courtney laughed nervously. 

“Look...I know you guys are kind of kidding around. And the truth is, we haven’t really talked about this. But...” She paused, sneaking a look at Vixen, then continued, “I don’t know. Right now I’m having a very hard time imagining a future without her in it.” 

“Damn…” Monet said. “Well, alright then.” 

“Remember us when you’re living in some Hollywood mansion,” Asia said. 

Vixen caught Courtney’s eye once again, squeezing her hand beneath the table. 

***

“Were you serious, before?” Vixen asked as Courtney flopped down onto the bed. They’d just returned from brunch, and Vixen’s mind hadn’t stopped reeling. 

“Hmm?” Courtney blinked up at her. She clearly still had a bit of a buzz; that third bellini had done quite a number on her. 

Vixen sat down gingerly beside her, kicking off her shoes. Maybe this wasn’t the right time for such an important discussion. On the other hand, Vixen’s own state was giving her enough liquid courage to broach the topic, and she wasn’t sure when she’d have another opportunity. 

“At brunch. You said that you wanted to build a future together. Was that serious, or were you just like...speaking hypothetically?” 

Courtney rolled onto her side, propping her head up with her arm. 

“I was serious,” she said softly, then asked, “Did that freak you out?” 

“No.” Vixen offered a smile, and Courtney grinned back, wrapping her arms around her waist. 

“Good.” Courtney tilted her chin up, clearly expecting a kiss. 

Vixen kissed her softly, slowly, one leg slipping between hers as Courtney licked into her mouth. She allowed herself to luxuriate in the affection, breath growing ragged and heated, fingers winding into her hair, before pulling away. 

“I should tell you something.” 

“Right now?” Courtney’s swollen lips and glazed eyes begged for more, and it took all of Vixen’s strength to resist. 

“Yeah…” Vixen took a deep breath and leaned against the pillows. “Um...so, you know how I gave that lecture at UCLA over the summer?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Well...um. I’ve been talking to the chair of their African American Studies department about taking over a couple of classes in the Winter and Spring semesters next year, for this other professor who’s going on maternity leave. And then in the Fall, when they have a tenured position opening up, I could be considered-”

“What?!” Courtney shrieked, practically leaping into her lap. 

“It’s not a concrete offer yet, don’t freak out!” Vixen laughed. But it was no use. Courtney’s eyes were wide as saucers, face the picture of excitement. “And it would only be part-time…”

“You can stay with me! If you want. You might want your own place, huh? But you can have your own room! And bathroom! And we can put another desk in the office...or do you want your own office?” 

“So I guess that part about how it’s not a real offer yet doesn’t concern you…?” 

“No.” Courtney buried her face into Vixen’s neck, arms around her shoulders. After a few moments, she lifted her head, a giddy laugh escaping as she gazed into Vixen’s eyes, pulling her in for another kiss. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Vixen was a traitor to feminism (jk) and then told Courtney about a possible job offer in LA.   
> This chapter: Vixen comes to LA to meet her new colleagues and pay her girlfriend a visit. 

Courtney and Vixen were both true to their word to not let too much time go by before their next visit. In late October, once Vixen’s part-time position at UCLA became official, she jumped at the chance to meet with the team she’d be working with in person. 

Her flight arrived on a Tuesday afternoon while Courtney was working, doing some ADR for Glimmer. Brie let her in and helped her get settled, showing her where Courtney had cleared out space in the closet and dresser. 

Vixen smiled to herself. She was only going to be staying for a week, but Courtney had (intentionally, she was sure) made enough space for all of the clothes she owned. She put her things away, sipping on a glass of Courtney’s favorite brand of fair trade coconut water, finding that she’d come to really enjoy the taste. She shook her head—if she wasn’t careful, that girl was gonna have her on some kind of vegan raw food diet soon. 

She was just starting to feel a bit hungry when a blonde figure raced into the room, nearly tackling her to the ground in glee, covering her face with kisses. 

“How was your flight?” 

“Fine. I feel a little grimy though, maybe I should-”

“Do you have enough space?” 

“Yes! Fucking plenty, how long do you think I’m here for?” Vixen laughed. 

“Maybe I was trying to tempt you to stay longer,” Courtney said with a coy flutter of lashes. 

“Good try.” 

“Do you want to go out for dinner?” she asked. 

“Not particularly.” 

“So...what do you want to eat, then?” 

Vixen’s eyes raked up and down her body, a naughty smirk on her face, and Courtney grinned back at her. 

“Always gotta order off-menu, don’t you?” 

“I thought you _were_ the menu,” said Vixen. 

Courtney giggled. 

“Well, that’s fair.” 

“I’ve also been eyeing up your spa shower.” 

“Oh yeah? Want me to show you how it works?” Courtney murmured. 

Vixen offered a sweet smile, saying, “Yes, please.” 

“Hmm, such good manners, baby.” 

Courtney turned her around by the shoulders, swatting her lightly on the ass, and then ushered her towards the bathroom. 

***

“Shit,” Courtney said a bit later as they curled in bed, wearing nothing but moisturizer and a loose sheet. “I forgot about dinner.” 

“Oh yeah. Whoops.” 

Courtney giggled, sitting up and stretching. “I have some chili and cornbread that I made last night, how does that sound?” 

“Vegan chili?” Vixen made a face. 

“It’s really good,” Courtney said. “Super spicy. It might be too much for you.”

“Oh yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of. Your Caucasian seasoning.”

Courtney giggled. “And the cornbread is so good, I got the recipe from-“

“Vegan cornbread?!” Vixen looked even more offended at that prospect, making Courtney laugh again.

“Why don’t you try it, and if you hate it, I’ll order you pizza.” 

“You guys got Chicago pizza out here?” Vixen asked. 

Courtney pressed her lips into a line. 

“Look, I know I’m only lived there for a few years, but as an honorary New Yorker, I feel like I have to tell you that Chicago pizza—”

“Bitch, you watch your mouth—” 

“—Is not pizza,” Courtney finished, watching Vixen’s face closely for any sign, trying desperately not to laugh. 

After a beat, Vixen reached for her. 

“I’m gonna fucking _get_ you for that,” she growled.

Courtney shrieked, leaping off the bed and racing through the house, laughing, to the kitchen, Vixen on her heels. Once in the kitchen, Vixen pinned her against the counter with her arms behind her.

“Say you were lying.” 

“No!” Courtney giggled, squirming as Vixen began a concentrated tickle attack. 

“Chicago deep dish for liiiiiife!” 

Courtney collapsed against her chest, still laughing. Putting her freed arms around Vixen’s shoulders. 

“It’s not pizza. It’s just a cheese...pie.” 

“Exactly!” Vixen laughed. 

“But I don’t eat cheese,” Courtney reminded her. 

“Right. Another strike against you…” 

“What was the first strike?” Courtney asked, pouting. 

“You’re trying to feed me vegan cornbread,” Vixen told her with a stern head shake. “My mom would be horrified.” 

“Just a little taste. I bet you’ll like it.” 

“Ugh, you’re not even gonna have real butter to spread on it!” Vixen moaned. 

“I have Earth Balance.” Courtney wriggled out of her arms and opened the fridge, getting out a couple of containers and half of a cornbread, wrapped in foil. 

Vixen watched her from behind, leaning on the counter, surveying her naked ass appreciatively before saying, “This isn’t exactly hygienic cooking attire, is it?” 

Courtney set everything on the counter and pulled open a drawer, producing two aprons. 

“Here we go. Better?” 

“Very classy.” 

Once the cornbread was properly heated and spread with Earth Balance, Vixen took a childish, wincing bite. 

“Well?” Courtney asked expectantly. “Come on...that’s good.” 

“It’s...less offensive than I thought it would be,” she admitted. 

“I’ll take it.” Courtney wrapped her arms around Vixen’s waist, pulling her in for a kiss. “Do you still want pizza?” 

“What’s the point?!” Vixen sighed. “It’s gonna be that New York bullshit. Or worse, something all LA like whole wheat crust and soy cheese.” 

“Guess again.” Courtney displayed her phone screen, PostMates opened to a Chicago deep-dish pizza place with 5-star reviews. 

“When did you find that place?” 

“I asked my friend Shea for recommendations last week. She’s from Chicago.” 

Vixen broke out into a huge grin. 

“You did?” 

“Mmmhmm…” Courtney trailed kisses down Vixen’s neck, murmuring, “I didn’t want any reason for you to hate LA.” 

Vixen laughed. “There are a million reasons to hate LA. It’s a horrible city. Shallow, uncultured, and this dry air is terrible for my skin…” 

Courtney continued to kiss her, winding her fingers into her hair. 

“But...I could maybe learn to accept it,” Vixen continued. “In time.” 

“Yeah, you think so?” 

“I guess…” she teased, fingers sliding down Courtney’s body to wrap around her thighs, lifting her up onto the counter. “There are one or two things I don’t hate.” 

“Like what?” Courtney sighed, arching up as Vixen’s mouth trailed down her body. 

“Guess.” 

“So…” Courtney bit her lip. “Does that mean you’re excited to play house with me this week?” 

“Absolutely.” 

***

Halloween, Vixen discovered, was very important to Courtney. She was having a party on Saturday, and before they went to sleep, insisted on getting out a selection of potential costumes. 

“Shouldn’t we talk about this tomorrow?” Vixen stifled a yawn. 

“I have to give the others notice.” 

“What others?” 

“Well, I told Adore and Gigi that we’d need them to join in if we do Ninja Turtles. And Brie is on standby in case we need all 3 of them for the Spice Girls.” 

“Spice Girls is cool. I get to be Scary though, right? You’re not doing some nonsense color-blind casting?” 

“You’re Scary. I’m Ginger. Brie is baby, Adore is Sporty, and Gigi is Posh.” 

“Okay,” Vixen yawned again. “Approved.”

“Perfect,” Courtney said, slipping under the covers to join her. 

***

The next day was spent on campus, meeting (and re-meeting, in a few cases) Vixen’s colleagues, auditing a class with the professor for whom she was taking over, and having a strategy session with the head of the department about the changes she’d proposed for the syllabus, along with another intriguing proposal. When it was all over, she met Courtney for dinner at a restaurant in Brentwood, excited to tell her all about the day. 

“Apparently everyone’s having babies,” she laughed, recounting the offer for her to take over a workshop series from one of their other professors starting in the Spring semester, bringing her to what basically amounted as full time. 

Courtney smiled, seemingly charmed by her enthusiasm. It wasn’t until she’d finished telling her all about the new offer that she sensed a bit of anxiety. 

“So...then, you’re excited about it?” 

“About the job? Are you kidding? It’s a dream job. Especially if it leads to a tenured position. Fingers crossed on that!” Vixen grinned, a little puzzled why Courtney’s brow was still creased with worry. “Why do you ask?” 

“Well...I mean, your whole world is in Chicago. Your family, all your friends…” 

“Yeah, but I’ll still see them. And I can make new friends here. I’m very charming, you know.”

“You are.” Courtney smiled, twirling her wine glass. “But...do you really want to leave? What if you hate it here?”

“I don’t understand. You were the one who said we should live in the same city-”

“Yes, but I assumed I’d be the one moving. Eventually.” 

Vixen blinked for a few moments, a bit stunned. It hadn’t even occurred to her that when Courtney said they should live closer that _she_ would be moving. 

“I mean I travel so much anyway for work, I can really live anywhere, so it just makes sense that I would...come to you. I just don’t want you to make this big sacrifice for me, when I’m...I don’t need that. I didn’t ask you to-” 

Vixen’s eyes softened, and she reached across the table to take Courtney’s hand. 

“I know. I know you didn’t. But...I’ve been trying to get an in with this department for 4 years. I started talking to them more seriously last Fall. And then, when my book sales picked up...for some strange reason,” she paused, giving Courtney a sly wink, “that’s when they actually got interested. The academic world moves very slowly.” 

“So...the job came first?” 

“The job came first,” Vixen assured her. “You’re not such a bad bonus, though.” 

Courtney finally relaxed, tensing leaving her shoulders, smile brightening as she leaned forward to kiss Vixen’s cheek. 

“And...do you really think you could be happy here?” she asked. 

Vixen stroked her face, nodding slowly. “I do.” 

***

Courtney’s Halloween party was a trip. So many of the faces were vaguely familiar, and Vixen kept having a hard time figuring out if it was because they were famous, or because she’d seen them on Courtney’s Instagram. Like Tatianna, a strikingly beautiful woman dressed as Peter Pan, who she could have sworn she’d met before, only to realize a few minutes after she’d begun talking (gushing, actually, to Courtney about her new engagement) that she’d been a fairly famous model at one point. 

Or the pretty black woman whose face she knew for certain that she’d seen before, but couldn’t place for the life of her, when she approached them to say hi to Courtney. 

“Hi Shea! You look amazing!” Courtney said, giving her a hug. “Vix, you remember Shea from the VMAs, right?”

Vixen gave Courtney a silent ‘thank you’ with her eyes before smiling warmly at Shea. 

“Of course, nice to see you again.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I know your date,” Courtney said. 

“Hi, I’m Sasha-”

“Doctor Sasha Velour,” Shea said, her gorgeous smile growing as she put her arm around the woman beside her, adding, “I’m dating a doctor.”

“Congratulations!” Courtney laughed. “Are you a medical doctor, or…?” 

“I’m a psychologist,” Sasha said. 

“Ah, awesome! Well, Dr. Sasha Velour, this is Dr. Vixen Taylor,” Courtney said, then murmured to Shea playfully, “See, I can date a doctor too.” 

Shea stuck her tongue out at Courtney, who returned it, both of them giggling. 

“They’re so mature,” Vixen noted to Sasha, giving her air kisses so as not to disturb her elaborate makeup. 

“I know, right?” Sasha laughed, looking at her girlfriend lovingly. 

They chatted for a few minutes before moving on to greet more guests, Courtney holding Vixen’s hand the whole time, making sure that she gave ample clues if it was someone Vixen should be expected to know. (And keeping an eye out for Adore and Gigi so that they could take their group Spice Girls picture, which Vixen suspected was Courtney’s real purpose for having a party in the first place.)

At least Vixen knew who Honey Mahogany was. Courtney’s _Glimmer_ co-star was an amazing actress, well respected for her political activism, and someone that Vixen couldn’t wait to meet. She’d come dressed as Diana Ross, in her iconic orange jumpsuit and cape from the Central Park concert. Vixen was a little star-struck, but allowed Courtney to pull her over and say hi. 

“Ah, I see we’ve both come as iconic divas,” Honey said warmly, looking at Vixen’s Scary Spice outfit. Vixen chuckled nervously and took her offered hand. 

“I should be thanking you,” Vixen said. 

“Why’s that?” 

“I heard you were the one who gave Ginger over here my book,” Vixen gestured to Courtney, clad in a Union Jack dress and gogo boots, who nodded emphatically. 

“She was indeed!” 

“If you’d seen the inside of any of her trailers, you might not be thanking me,” Honey laughed. “She’s an absolute disaster. She also has this terrible habit of—” 

“Oh my god, stop!” Courtney clapped a hand over her mouth to end the teasing, the two of them clearly having a playful bond, as Honey bit her finger lightly. Courtney yelped and pulled her fingers away, letting her continue. 

“—of trying to shut me up when all I’m doing is saying true things that you’ll find out about sooner or later.” 

Courtney laughed, shaking her head. 

“I thought you supported our relationship, Ms. Mahogany.” 

“I do!” Honey grinned. “But she should know what she’s getting into. Also, don’t let her eat anything cabbage-related, because when I tell you what an ungodly smell-” 

“Okay, that’s enough of that,” Courtney giggled, pulling Vixen away. She tossed a kiss back over her shoulder at Honey, who was still laughing. 

“I actually really did want to talk to her,” Vixen said. “I think we have a lot in common.” 

“Oh. Sorry!” Courtney said, turning back around and shouting, “Honey! Wait!” 

“And you know, I appreciate the attentiveness, but you really don’t have to babysit,” Vixen smiled. 

“Am I stifling you?” Courtney asked, biting her lip. 

“Only a little.” Vixen pressed a kiss to Courtney’s forehead. “But it’s okay.” 

“You rang?” Honey asked as she reapproached, a drink in her hand. 

“I’m sorry I interrupted. Carry on!” Courtney chirped, scampering off to go talk to her other party guests. 

All things considered, Vixen had a good time. Even when Adore started force-feeding shots to Courtney, grinding on her in a manner that Vixen found mildly inappropriate for a so-called platonic friend. It was hard to be annoyed while Courtney was laughing hysterically and shoving a handful of pretzels into Adore’s face. And watching them clown around like children, Vixen started to understand their bond a little more. 

It was almost 4 am by the time the last of the revelers went home. (Or in Adore’s case, passed out face-down and ass out in the guest room, track pants around her ankles.) 

“She’s a precious angel, isn’t she?” Gigi asked, removing her sneakers and pants and throwing the covers over her. 

“The most precious,” Courtney giggled, kissing Gigi on the cheek. “Thank you for taking care of her.” 

“Of course,” Gigi said. 

“You really are a saint,” Vixen commented from the doorway. 

“Nah…” Gigi turned around with a smirk. “The sex is just _that_ good.” 

“I’m so happy for you both,” Courtney laughed, as she walked towards the door. “Nighty-night, kids.” 

“Goodnight, mom,” Gigi replied, slipping under the covers. She leaned in close to Adore, hand on her back, then gave them a thumbs-up. “Still breathing!” 

Courtney closed the door behind her, still chuckling, and took Vixen’s hand. 

“Omigod, I’m so tired…Do I _need_ to brush my teeth or can I skip it?”

“Mmm, I don’t know. What will Disney say if your teeth start falling out?” Vixen teased. 

“Ugh, fine, I’ll be responsible.” 

***

Even though they stayed up late, Courtney woke up relatively early, eyes fluttering open, a patch of sunlight on the comforter warming her. She turned to Vixen, surprised to find her awake too, giving her a sleepy smile. 

“Morning.” 

Courtney reached out a hand to touch her cheek, fingers lingering indulgently on her smooth brown skin. Her dark eyes began to close, nuzzling into Courtney’s touch. The vulnerability of that simple move made Courtney want to wrap her into a hug and never let go. 

“We don’t have to get up, right? We can just...stay in bed all day?” 

“If that’s what you want, you got it,” Courtney replied, leaning forward to press their foreheads together. In that moment, Courtney would have agreed to anything Vixen wanted, anything to make her happy.

“I mean, I guess you have to go feed the dog at some point,” Vixen mused. 

“I’ll text Adore to do it.” 

“Wow, finally she’s good for something,” Vixen said, and then there was a flash of worry, wondering if she’d crossed a line. 

But Courtney just grinned, and Vixen gave her a matching, dazzling smile, eyes crinkling happily. 

“You’re so cute,” Courtney said. 

Courtney swung a leg over her, straddling her, sheets bunched up around her waist, topless except for some residual Halloween glitter strewn across her chest. 

“ _You’re_ cute,” Vixen said back, sliding her hands up Courtney’s thighs. She chuckled softly, shaking her head. 

“What’s so funny?” Courtney asked, fingers dancing over her skin. 

“I just...never thought I’d fall in love with a white girl…”

Courtney’s eyes widened in delighted shock, mouth falling open. She’d been holding back a bit, not wanting to scare Vixen off, but that was about the best thing she could possibly hear. 

“What?”

*

Vixen’s brow furrowed, wondering why Courtney looked so surprised. Until her face softened into a dreamy-eyed expression, explaining, “You said ‘love.’”

_Oops._

“Oh shit,” Vixen said, suppressing a grin. “I didn’t mean it!” 

Courtney began to tickle her, bending down to nibble at her neck, murmuring, “Did so.”

“Nooooo,” Vixen protested weakly, as Courtney pinned her arms above her head, noses nearly touching. 

“You love me.” Courtney was glowing, the happiest Vixen had ever seen her. 

“I don’t,” Vixen lied with a petulant pout. 

“Hmm. Well, that’s a shame. Because I love you. So much,” Courtney said, pressing kisses along her jaw.

“Yeah, I know, you’re really obvious about it,” Vixen said. But her insides were flipping over, stomach swarming with happy butterflies. 

“Good.”

“I guess this means I win,” she continued. “Since, you know, you said it first.” 

“Is that so?”

“I don’t make the rules,” said Vixen. She shrugged, arms still above her head, and batted her lashes up at Courtney, who giggled softly and kissed her again. 

“Congratulations. On your win,” Courtney said.

“Thanks.” 

Courtney released her arms, gazing down at her, hovering on all fours with a smile pulling at her mouth. Vixen reached up to cup her face, thumbs running over her cheekbones. She pulled her in close, whispering in her ear. 

“It’s true, you know. I do...kind of love you.” 

“Are you sure?” Courtney whispered back, eyes glittering. 

Vixen nodded, stomach doing somersaults as happiness washed over Courtney’s face. 

“Me too.” 

Courtney laid back down, curled contentedly in her arms, as Vixen kissed to top of her head. 

By the time she left for the airport two days later, it rolled off her tongue so easily that she wondered why she hadn’t said it sooner. 

_I love you, I love you, I love you..._


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Vixen took a trip to LA to meet her new work colleagues and play house with Courtney. And magic words were shared.   
> This chapter: Courtney meets the family, and Vixen gets a surprise.

Courtney could barely sit still as she rode in the back of the car from the airport. It had been three weeks. Three endless weeks, since Vixen had left LA. Of course, they still spoke every day, but the physical absence had gotten more excruciating with each passing day. Now, Courtney was in Chicago for Thanksgiving and she’d blocked out a full week to spend with her beautiful girlfriend. 

_VIXEN: Tell me when you’re pulling up, I’ll come down and get you. <3 _

_COURTNEY: Pulling up!_

_COURTNEY: A nice old lady let me in. You’re on the 3rd floor, right?_

_VIXEN: Shit!_

Courtney stepped out of the elevator, suitcase in hand, just as Vixen threw open the front door of her apartment. 

“I’m sorry, I was making dinner and I didn’t see the phone buzz, and then you were—”

Courtney cut Vixen off by leaping into her arms, legs wrapped around her waist. 

“—already here,” she finished, holding Courtney tightly. “Hi.” 

“Hi,” Courtney said, inhaling the sweet scent of her neck, thrilled to be back in her arms. She tried not to sound pathetic as she said, “I missed you,” against her skin. 

“Me too,” Vixen whispered back. 

Courtney lifted her head to kiss her hungrily—almost desperate. She felt Vixen’s fingers digging into her back as she slid down, forgetting everything but the feel of her lips, the press of her body. Winding her fingers into her hair. 

Vixen giggled softly, saying, “I knew you’d go straight for the hair.” 

She’d been to the salon to get her twists out, and even though Courtney had seen it on FaceTime, it didn’t do justice to how soft and shiny and perfect her curls were. Courtney gazed at her, lashes fluttering. 

“I love it,” she proclaimed, going in for another kiss. 

“Do you want to take this inside?” Vixen asked, and a blush rose to Courtney’s cheeks. 

“Sorry,” she said, breaking away and picking up her suitcase and backpack from the ground, where she’d carelessly dropped them. 

“It’s okay.” Vixen grinned, taking her hand and leading her inside. 

“Omigod, I love your place!” Courtney exclaimed, leaning her suitcase against the wall and spinning around.

Vixen’s apartment was exactly what Courtney expected. Warm and cozy, the kind of shabby-chic style you would expect from an academic, with hand-knitted afghans on the sofa and chairs, and an eclectic mix of bold, colorful art. And of course, there were teeming, overstuffed bookcases everywhere.

“Yeah? I tried to straighten up for you,” Vixen chuckled. She picked up a bottle of wine from the dining room table, saying, “Want a drink?” 

“Yes please!” Courtney answered gratefully. 

While Vixen opened the wine, she wandered around a little, browsing the bookshelves, touching the spines of a few as she read the titles. There were a lot of academic tomes and social science, but also lots of well-worn novels and books of poetry. 

“Monet fucking _hates_ that they’re not organized properly,” Vixen said. “She can barely tolerate even being in here.” 

Courtney chuckled. That made sense—Monet was a librarian, after all. But for Courtney, it was a delightful mix, like putting a playlist on shuffle. Every shelf gave a slightly different but equally accurate snapshot of Vixen’s personality, of all the things she cared about. It was beautiful. 

She ran her finger along the spine of one book, a copy of _Invisible Man_ that was so well-loved, it appeared to be falling apart. As Vixen approached with the wine, she felt a smile tugging at her lips. 

“I had this ex who had stuffed bookshelves, too,” Courtney said, fingers dancing over more of the titles. “Only, when you looked up close, you realized that they were mostly coffee table books and bestsellers, arranged for aesthetic purposes.” 

“Mmm.” 

Courtney turned around to see the mildly exasperated smile on Vixen’s face. 

“What?” 

“You don’t always have to say ‘my ex.’ You can just say Bianca,” Vixen said. 

Courtney opened her mouth, then closed it, cheeks burning with embarrassment. 

“Do I do that a lot?” she asked. 

“Yeah,” said Vixen, handing her the glass, touching her fingers gently to soften the blow. 

“Sorry.” 

“It’s okay. I’m less fragile than you think, you know.” Vixen gave her a smirk, taking a small sip. “And I know she’s still important to you.” 

“I honestly don’t know why I even think of her that way. It would really be more accurate to just say ‘my friend.’” 

Vixen tucked a lock of hair behind Courtney’s ear, lips brushing against her temple. 

“Call her whatever you want. As long as you’re here with me, I don’t care.” 

Courtney looked up at her, eyes shining with relief and happiness, and clinked their glasses together. 

“Cheers to that.” 

***

Vixen smiled, feeling Courtney’s thighs trembling and shaking, continuing to lick her softly from below until her muscles gave out completely, then depositing her onto her back and quickly grabbing a vibrator from the little bag of toys on the nightstand. 

Courtney hadn’t even caught her breath before she turned it on, barely touching her, making her moan and thrash, clawing at her back and ass. 

(It was still a bit mind-boggling to Vixen how many times in a row Courtney could come. She supposed it was just one of those XX chromosome things she’d never experience.) 

Courtney’s hands were everywhere on her body, and it made Vixen shiver to think of how much she was getting off on just touching her. 

“Baby…” Vixen worked the vibrator in circles, trying to catch her glazed eyes. “How ya doin?”

Courtney whimpered, arching up. 

“Are you done? Do you want me to stop?” 

Courtney shook her head vigorously, fingers wrapping around Vixen’s wrist, guiding her hand, showing her where to press harder. Once Vixen complied, Courtney wove her hands into her hair and pulled her in for a frenzied kiss, breath ragged. Vixen licked into her mouth, swallowing those delicious moans until they reached a crescendo, then immediately pulling the vibrator away, knowing it would be too much in her over-sensitive state. As Courtney curled against her, she went back in with the pads of her fingers, rubbing lightly. She pressed kisses against her temples, her lips, down her jaw and into the tenderest spot on her neck. 

“Fuck…” Courtney breathed. “That was incredible.” 

“I missed you,” Vixen whispered against her. 

Courtney mustered up all her strength to roll over on top of Vixen, kissing her with even more urgency, still hungry for her even after all that. 

“I missed you too, baby…” said Courtney, taking Vixen’s lower lip in between her teeth and sucking on it. “I hate being away from you.” 

“It’ll be better soon,” Vixen murmured, wrapping her arms securely around Courtney, holding her tight. Courtney let out a small noise of agreement, burying her face against Vixen’s neck, breath warm on her collarbone. 

“Have I ever told you how much I love this scent?” she asked. 

“Oh yeah? You’re into shea butter?” 

“Yeah.” Courtney lifted her head, eyes glittering in the dark. “Every time I smell it, I get all…” She grinned, biting her lip. 

“Wow.”

“What?” Courtney asked. 

“It just never occurred to me until this second that everyone’s mom doesn’t smell like shea butter.” 

Courtney burst out laughing. 

“Please don’t hit on my mom tomorrow,” Vixen said somberly. “She’s going to smell very irresistible.”

“I’ll do my best,” Courtney giggled, tickling her in the side, making her squeal. “You’re so cute.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Uh huh. I love you so much.” Courtney ran a thumb along her bottom lip. 

Vixen smiled up at her, enjoying the warmth of her body pressing down. 

“I love you, too,” she said, eyes falling closed to accept Courtney’s soft, gentle kiss, hands sliding down her torso, showering her with affection.

***

Vixen was strangely calm about introducing Courtney to her family. She supposed that she should have been nervous--after all, she hadn’t brought a girl home since high school, and that was, of course, an entirely different situation. But it just somehow felt natural with Courtney. 

And to her relief, no one acted weird about Courtney being famous. In fact, they put her to work in the kitchen right away, first chopping garlic and then shelling beans. It wasn’t until her cousin showed up that anyone even said anything about Courtney’s career. 

Amanda, her cousin’s ten-year-old daughter, stepped inside the kitchen and let out the most blood-curdling scream Vixen had ever heard, then burst into tears. 

“You okay, Mandy?” Vixen asked. 

“It’s…” Amanda lifted a shaking hand to point at Courtney. “It’s P-princess Luuuucie...” 

As she dissolved into fresh tears, Courtney got up and made her way towards the little girl tentatively. 

“Hey there, I’m Courtney. Can I give you a hug, sweetie?” 

Amanda nodded, tears still rolling down her cheeks as Courtney knelt down, giving her a big hug. 

“Thank you. I’m so glad you’re here! Want to help us shell the rest of these beans?” Courtney gestured to the table. 

“They’re making you _shell beans?!_ ” Amanda exclaimed, horrified. She whirled around to look at Vixen’s mother, her great aunt, yelling, “She’s a _princess!_ ” 

“Okay, Mandy, that’s enough. Go wash your face, and then say hi to Grammy, and then think about acting right before you come back in here.” Her mother set a couple of bags of groceries on the kitchen table, greeting her relatives with hugs and kisses, completely unfazed by her daughter’s meltdown. 

“But, mama-”

“I said go!” she exclaimed, then turned to Courtney as Amanda slunk out of the room, saying, “I’m sorry about that.” 

“Oh, it’s alright,” Courtney shrugged. She seemed quite unbothered by the whole scene as well, which made Vixen laugh. 

“Does that happen a lot?” Vixen asked incredulously. She couldn’t imagine walking around causing children to spontaneously scream and cry. 

“Kinda, yeah,” Courtney admitted. “Kids love me.” 

“That must be so weird.” Vixen tossed a few beans into the bowl and picked up a new pod. 

“It was at first. But like...I think the really weird part is that it’s not weird anymore? That’s when you know you’ve become especially disconnected from reality. Like, my friend’s daughter being utterly distraught that I spoke English, since she’d only seen the French dub-”

“Wait,” Vixen interrupted. “You have French friends?” 

“Oh, uh...not really?” Courtney said. 

“Let her finish her damn story!” Vixen’s mom said. 

“Fine, fine, go ahead.” 

“Well...she was really upset, but then I said three words in French and the poor baby lost her absolute shit, and then 10 seconds later we were BFFs. Oh! And later that day, another little girl fainted in the lobby of the hotel when she saw me. Normal Tuesday.” Courtney shrugged. “What can I say, my life is strange.” 

“Hmm...well, if you ever need me to knock you down a few pegs…” Vixen offered sweetly, kicking her under the table. 

“Awww, you’re so generous…” 

“Endlessly giving,” her mom echoed from the sink, and the whole group burst out laughing some more. 

***

Courtney sighed, climbing under the covers. It had been a long, fun day, but she was exhausted. Even though Vixen’s family was lovely and welcoming, it took a lot of energy just to be that “on” for so many hours, doing her best to make a good impression and not say any ignorant shit that would make them hate her. 

She knew that she was being a little paranoid. (After all, if she survived Bianca’s family, she could survive anything.) But nonetheless, she’d felt a strong pressure, knowing how close Vixen was with her family and how important their opinions were to her. 

Vixen settled in beside her, allowing Courtney to wrap her arms around her from behind, lips pressed to the back of her neck. 

“Mmm…” Courtney sighed happily. “Can I just say that I love how you can be the big spoon or the little spoon?”

Vixen let out a sleepy chuckle, saying, “You know that spoons only nest if they’re the same size, right? There really shouldn’t be a big spoon or a little spoon. Just...spoons.”

When Courtney was silent for a few long moments, Vixen turned her head to look at her. 

“You okay?”

“Yeah I just...my mind is totally blown.” Courtney shook her head, stunned, and Vixen giggled. 

“Okay.” 

“Seriously! That’s...the best metaphor. You should write a book.” 

“I did write a book,” Vixen reminded her. 

“Another book. About relationships. ‘Just Be Spoons.’ It’s fucking brilliant!” she enthused. 

“Maybe let’s see if we make it through the holidays first.” Vixen kissed her forehead before turning back around and settling against the pillow. 

“Fair enough,” Courtney laughed. 

***

“Keep your eyes closed,” Courtney insisted, guiding Vixen through her house. She’d just arrived in LA, and after mauling her in the doorway for a few minutes, Courtney began to chatter excitedly about a “surprise” that she just couldn’t wait to show off. “Are they closed?” 

“Yes, ma’am,” Vixen promised, making Courtney giggle. Knowing her, the surprise could be anything...a new plant, tickets to a concert, a romantic dinner...Vixen didn’t think she was super into jewelry, but she allowed herself a brief fantasy of something extravagant that she could wear with a little black dress. 

“Okay.” Courtney’s hands left her shoulders and settled on her waist. “You can open them.” 

Vixen opened her eyes, and for a moment she wasn’t quite sure what she was looking at. They were in a room off the kitchen that Courtney used for yoga, as an office, and, when necessary, a spare guest room. The last time she was here, the door had been closed, so she assumed that Courtney was in the middle of some elaborate project. 

Turns out, she was right, because the room was now a gorgeously decorated office, with floor to ceiling bookshelves on almost every wall, a beautiful desk in the corner, an overstuffed sofa and two comfy chairs. 

“The furniture is all made of reclaimed wood. And the upholstery is covered with ethically sourced textiles,” Courtney explained proudly. “Do you like it?” 

“It’s really nice,” Vixen told her, looking around. The big picture window had a cozy seat and a beautiful view of the city, and the graphic prints on the upholstery and rugs would have looked at home in her own apartment. “Maybe sometimes you’ll let me use it, too.” 

“What?” Courtney’s brow furrowed. 

“You know, when I’m here, maybe I can...share the space. If that’s okay.”

“No, baby, you don’t understand.” Courtney laughed, pulling Vixen in by the hand. “It’s _all_ yours.” 

Vixen’s brain short-circuited for a moment, blinking at Courtney as if she was speaking an as yet unknown language. Finally, after a few moments of disbelief, she managed to squeak out, “Mine?” 

“Mmhmm. I know you need a place to write, and I figured that having a private space while you’re here would just...make things easier for you.” 

“I…” Vixen was overwhelmed. In spite of her brief fantasy about jewelry, she was wholly unprepared for an entire room. How was this her real life? “I don’t know what to say. It’s...it’s beautiful.” 

“You’re beautiful,” Courtney said, wrapping her into an embrace. “And we can change stuff if there’s anything you don’t like. I just thought it would be better to get it started, so that-”

“It’s perfect. Thank you. I’m sorry, I’m really overwhelmed. I mean...it’s a whole room of your house.” 

“Our house,” Courtney said softly. “I know you’re only gonna be here part time, at first, but…” 

Vixen nodded, throat suddenly feeling dry and itchy. Her eyes misted over, Courtney’s face becoming blurry as tears clouded her vision. 

“Shit.” 

Courtney cradled her cheeks, standing on her tiptoes to press their foreheads together. 

“I love you, baby…” she whispered. 

***

“So, what do you think?” Courtney asked. When Vixen had come out of the restroom, she was posed on the bed in her harness and a brand-new strap - this one neon green, textured and curvy. 

“Uhh...it’s bigger than the other one.” 

“Too big?” Courtney asked, a saucy glint in her eye. 

Vixen felt her cheeks grow hotter under Courtney’s knowing smirk, shaking her head. 

“I’ll manage.” 

Courtney grinned, patting the spot on the bed beside her. “Come show me.” 

Vixen tilted her head coquettishly and crawled onto the bed. She was wearing a Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras tank top, borrowed from Courtney, and a pair of turquoise panties. Even though she knew that she looked cute as fuck, the way her girlfriend eyed her up and down definitely confirmed it. 

Courtney wasted no time, flipping her onto her back and hovering above her before dipping her head for a deep, intense kiss. Tingles went up Vixen’s spine as Courtney’s fingers danced up her thigh, slipping under her tank top. Vixen’s arms went soft and pliant, allowing her to pull off her top, a hand sliding over her breast, thumb circling her hardened nipple. 

Soft, loving kisses blanketed her neck and chest, making her weak and slightly dizzy. And the more she whimpered, curling her fingers into Courtney’s hair, the more it encouraged her. She caressed every inch of her torso, hot mouth traveling over her skin, tongue circling her nipples. 

It wasn’t long before Vixen was swooning under her careful attention, body aching with need. Especially when Courtney began to gently ease her panties down, trailing just the tips of her fingers over her trembling thighs. She reached blindly for the nightstand, groping for the bottle of lube and nearly knocking it over in the process. The bottle itself was a bit slippery, and Vixen pressed it into Courtney’s hand with a soft whine. 

Courtney took the bottle, but continued to worship her at a leisurely pace, teeth grazing the most sensitive parts of her inner thighs. 

Vixen whimpered, arching up, and was rewarded with a playful bite. 

“Please,” she whined breathlessly, long legs wrapping around Courtney’s shoulders. 

Courtney nuzzled against her thigh as she finally opened the lube, pouring it onto her fingers. Vixen closed her eyes. Letting Courtney prep her was still pretty new, and even though she felt a little funny about it, she couldn’t deny how deeply cared for she felt when Courtney pushed a finger inside her, her other hand wrapped around her waist, lips placing a gentle kiss against her hip. She breathed in slowly, trying to relax her muscles as a second finger joined, twisting in a way that made her gasp with pleasure. 

“Are you okay, baby?” Courtney murmured against her, and she opened her eyes, nodding. 

“Yeah, that’s good.” 

Courtney withdrew her fingers slowly, leaving Vixen feeling empty and desperate. She pulled Courtney close, nails raking down her back to her ass. 

“Gimme the lube,” she whispered, and Courtney poured a generous amount into her hand. Vixen reached down, coating the dildo, running her hand up and down the velvety curves as Courtney continued to kiss her. 

Courtney hovered above her, brushing their lips together gently and then sucking on her lower lip. Vixen drew her knees up and back, goosebumps breaking out all over her arms as legs as she shivered with anticipation. 

“Are you ready?” Courtney teased, nibbling down her jaw. 

“Yes, yes!” Vixen declared, nails digging into her ass, trying to pull her closer.

“You’re so beautiful…”

“Omigod, just fuck me!” 

Courtney laughed, face tucked into Vixen’s neck as she said, “Yes, ma’am.” 

“Sorry,” Vixen breathed, letting out a deep sigh as Courtney pushed inside her. 

“Don’t be sorry,” Courtney said, “I like a woman who knows what she wants.” 

“Yeah?” Vixen asked, rolling her hips. 

“Uh huh.” Courtney gripped her hips, thrusting against her, deep and slow. “So tell me...is this good?” 

“Harder,” Vixen whimpered, body arched up, eyes falling closed. Courtney began pumping harder, faster, and then a mouth found her nipple, sucking hard, and she let out a strangled moan. “Oh god, yes…” 

Courtney pressed her body forward, trapping Vixen’s dick between them, rubbing against their stomachs. Her tits brushed against Vixen’s own with every thrust, every inch of Vixen’s skin tingling with the contact. Her legs wrapped tighter and tighter around Courtney’s waist until her whole body was as tense as a coiled spring. 

“Are you close, baby?” Courtney asked, reached down to circle the head of her dick with her thumb. 

“Uh huh. Uh huh…” Vixen was so close, she found herself unable to speak, body in overdrive as she plunged off the cliff and dove head-first into the waves of pleasure. “Oh _god_.” 

Courtney licked up her throat, hips continuing to pound, slow and deep, until Vixen collapsed backwards, limbs falling limply onto the mattress. 

“I love you so much,” Courtney whispered, kissing her so softly that Vixen felt like she was made of glass. 

Vixen let out a soft, gratified sigh as Courtney pulled out, enjoying that feeling of being sated and spent. Her eyes fluttered open to look at Courtney’s face, the sweet and slightly smug smile as she gazed down. 

“So, did you like the new dick?” Courtney asked, winding one of Vixen’s curls around her finger. 

“Mmm…” Vixen nodded sleepily, letting Courtney wrap her into an embrace, cocooning them into the warm blankets. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Courtney spent Thanksgiving with Vixen’s family, and tried to make her feel welcome in LA.  
> This chapter: The holidays bring a lot of feelings, and in January, we spend time with some old friends.

Vixen spent almost all of December with Courtney in LA. Except for work, and a few obligatory holiday parties, it had mostly been just the two of them, finding their rhythm as a couple, learning each other’s most intimate quirks and preferences. On Christmas Eve, they packed a few little bags and drove up to a cabin in Big Bear, where they were meant to spend a blissful week together, curled in front of the fire while soft white snow fell outside. Courtney was beyond excited, clapping her hands like a child at the first sight of snow. 

“I can’t wait to have a white Christmas!” she exclaimed. 

“Watch it,” Vixen said, giving her some side-eye. 

She giggled delightedly. 

“It’s true, though! I usually end up somewhere warm over the holidays. And of course, it’s the dead of summer in Australia right now. So I’ve never actually had a white Christmas. Have you?” 

“Yeah, I’m from Chicago,” Vixen laughed. 

They were just getting settled when Courtney’s phone rang. She stepped into the other room to take it, and came back with a distressed look on her face that immediately filled Vixen with alarm. 

“What’s wrong? Are you okay? Is it your family-” 

“No, nothing like that, I just…” Courtney bit her lip.”There’s this New Year’s concert in New York and I said no before but now Disney is insisting that I go. They’re pulling some clause in my contract about promotional events and Latrice says that even if I fight it, I might lose and I don’t want an antagonistic relationship with fucking Disney anyway, and-” 

“Okay, okay…” Vixen wrapped her arms around Courtney’s waist. Her eyes were red and watery. “So...New Year’s in New York, then?” 

“You’re not mad?” Courtney whispered. 

“Maybe at The Mouse a little, but at you? Of course not. Why would I be-” she stopped, confused, as tears began to spill down Courtney’s cheeks. 

“I just don’t want you to think that you can’t count on me. Can’t trust me to keep my promises.” Courtney clung to Vixen’s shoulders, tears falling faster. 

Vixen didn’t really understand why she was so upset. She’d thought she had time off, but now she had to work...it didn’t seem that complicated. But regardless of Vixen’s own feelings on the subject, Courtney still appeared to be wracked with guilt. She cradled Courtney’s face, wiping her tears gently. 

“I’m sorry,” Courtney said, and Vixen shook her head. 

“It’s okay, babe.” 

“I feel like an idiot,” she admitted, sniffling. 

“Well, I mean you did think that I was gonna be mad at you for having to work. So...you’re a little bit of an idiot.” 

Courtney laughed through her tears, letting Vixen pull her in for an embrace. 

“I was just afraid that you...I don’t want to disappoint you.” 

“Hey, come on...” Vixen gave her a charming smile. “I can handle a little disappointment...especially when you’re about to give me an amazing Christmas present.” 

Her joke had the exact opposite effect she wanted, Courtney’s face crumbling again, and she pulled away to sit heavily on the bed. 

“Court, you know I’m kidding, right? I don’t actually care about stuff like that.” Vixen felt her stomach turn, actually offended at the prospect that she was serious. Was Courtney insane? Did she really think that Vixen was in this relationship for some kind of shallow material gain?

Courtney nodded, wiping the tears from her eyes. 

“Yeah. I know,” she said hoarsely, but Vixen was sure if she really believed it. 

“You sure about that?” Vixen put her hands on her hips, glaring down at her, waiting for a reply. When a few moments passed without anything, her skin grew hot and itchy. “Hello?” 

“Everyone thought I was with Bianca because of her money.” 

“Were you?” It slipped out before Vixen had the chance to stop herself, the tone harsher than intended. 

Courtney looked up sharply, but then sighed. Another tear trickled down her cheek. 

“Not...not exactly. But...I can’t deny that part of me was attracted to her success, you know? And I was young and lost and _tired_ and she took care of me. She made me feel safe.” 

“Okay. So...that’s you. That’s _your_ shit. Don’t put that on me.” Vixen wasn’t trying to make her feel worse, but she needed to be very clear. 

“I’m sorry.” Courtney bit her lip, tears falling faster. She raised her chin and looked up at Vixen, saying, “But be honest. Would you really be here if I couldn’t offer you…” 

Courtney trailed off, gesturing limply at...Vixen wasn’t sure. The cabin? 

“...all this?” 

“You know I have a job, right?” Vixen narrowed her eyes. 

“I know, but-” 

“A good job. One that took me eight years of fucking college to qualify for.” 

“Yeah-” 

“I’m not some kid who needed to be rescued from a life of poverty.” 

“I know. I’m sorry,” Courtney lowered her head, looking so pathetic and sad that Vixen found it impossible to stay annoyed. 

She sighed deeply, then sat down beside Courtney on the edge of the bed. 

“Look, the truth is, all the money and the fame...it’s exciting. But, it’s also intimidating and complicated and stressful, and...if I didn’t love you, it definitely wouldn’t be worth it.” 

“I’m sorry,” Courtney repeated. “I didn’t mean to imply that you...I’m just sorry. Sometimes it’s hard to tell who actually likes me, for me, and who...” 

Vixen took her hand, lacing their fingers together. 

“Let me be very clear. I’m not looking for someone to take care of me. Or...not in a one-sided way, anyway.” Courtney finally lifted her head again, and Vixen reached out to wipe the tears from her swollen cheeks. “I think it’s pretty clear that we need to take care of each other.” 

“Same sized spoons?” Courtney suggested hopefully, and Vixen laughed. 

“Yeah. Same sized spoons. Come here…” She pulled Courtney backwards, onto the bed, wrapping her arms around her, resting a head on her shoulder. 

She felt Courtney sigh softly, relaxing into her arms, melting against her. After a few moments, she giggled and said, “I did actually get you a really good present, though.” 

“It’s gonna be hard to top you building me an entire office,” Vixen told her. 

“We’ll seee,” Courtney sang. 

***

“So, um...how’s your album going?” Vixen asked Adore, cringing inwardly at how awkward she felt. “Courtney said you’re recording some new songs.” 

It was January. They’d gotten back to LA about a week ago, just in time for the Winter semester to start. Back to reality, back to work. Adore and Gigi had come over for Sunday brunch, and things were going fine until Gigi asked to see some new designs from Courtney’s clothing line, and the two of them scampered off. 

Vixen didn’t dislike Adore. Not exactly. She just didn’t feel like they had very much in common, but she hoped that asking about her music would at least keep her talking for a bit. 

“It’s been great!” Adore exclaimed. “This is only our second album, but we have a much more mature sound now, and I’m really psyched for people to hear the new stuff. The crowds we’ve been playing for recently are really responding and it’s just, you know...kinda magical.” Adore smiled, clearly happy to be talking about her music. “I know that sounds a bit gay, but it’s true.” 

“Well...I would hope so,” Vixen joked, and Adore giggled. 

“Do you want another drink?” Adore gestured to Vixen’s nearly empty Bloody Mary. 

“Uhh...yeah, why not.” 

“I mean it is Sunday, right?” Adore said, then added, “Not that that means anything to me, but I know you have an actual real job.” 

“I do.” Vixen held out her glass and Adore refilled it. When she spoke again, Adore did too. “So, have you-” 

“Did you start-” Adore stopped abruptly, giggling awkwardly. “Sorry, go ahead.” 

“No, that’s alright. You go.” 

“Oh. I was just gonna ask if you’d started your new job yet. At UCLA.” 

“Yeah. It’s only part-time for now, but the classes have started.” 

“Cool.” 

Vixen sipped her drink, glancing out at the ocean in the distance. Where the fuck were Courtney and Gigi, anyway?

“You know…” Adore began, and then trailed off. 

“Yes?” Vixen turned back to her, head cocked. 

“No, it’s just…what you’re seeing right now? This is the very best version of her. I mean, I’ve known her for 15 years—”

Adore smiled slightly, clearly remembering her friend from all those years ago, and it made Vixen’s heart melt a little. She knew that face, that fondness for the baby versions of her friends, and for the first time, she found herself truly understanding Adore. 

“—And I’ve...I’ve never seen her this confident in who she is, and what she wants. Or like, so happy.”

“Not even with your sister?” Vixen asked, a bit tentatively. She wasn’t sure if this was a weird area to venture into. But even though Courtney was pretty open about her (ancient, she claimed) relationship with Bianca, as well as their current friendship, there was always a tiny little nagging doubt in Vixen’s mind. 

“Definitely not. She was a mess back then,” Adore laughed. “But like, I guess I just want to make sure you know, and that you’ll...stick around even when it’s not the best version of her.” 

“Are you trying to tell me something?” Vixen’s brow furrowed. 

“No, just...shit happens. I know how amazing it is to be there on her good days. She’s like, the most fun, loving, adorable person in the world. But...she’s gonna have bad days, too. And it’s been a long time since she let anyone see those. So I just hope you’re really in it. Because she deserves that.” 

“I’m in it.” Vixen wanted to say more, but the lump in the throat prevented it, and anyway, she figured that was all Adore really needed to hear. 

And she must have been right, because a huge smile broke out on her face, and she lunged forward, wrapping Vixen into a tight, bear-like hug. Maybe they had something important in common after all. 

“Awww, are you two bonding?” Courtney cooed, and both of them turned to see her standing in the doorway with Gigi, looking like her heart would burst with happiness. 

“She was just giving me The Talk. Making sure I have good intentions with you,” Vixen explained. 

“Ooh, nice.” Courtney sat down beside Vixen, kissing her cheek. “Was she scary?” 

“Yeah, I was very Dad about it,” Adore said, and Gigi scoffed in feigned offense. 

“I thought that was our thing!” Gigi giggled, slipping into her lap. 

“Dear god, please make me unhear that,” Vixen groaned, and Courtney laughed some more, leaning a head on her shoulder. 

“I have a question for you guys,” Gigi said. “So...we all know that Courtney’s a bit of an insta-whore-”

“Excuse me!” Courtney laughed. “Don’t make me throw this mimosa at you, missy.”

“No, just like...you post a lot, right? But I haven’t seen anything about the two of you. So is your relationship, like...a secret?” 

“No!” Courtney said, then exchanged a look with Vixen. 

“It’s not a secret, exactly,” said Vixen. 

“You know how people are,” Courtney added. “We just want to keep things between us. For now. So yeah, people know. Kind of. It’s definitely not a secret. But we’re just not like...advertising far and wide.”

“Makes sense to me,” Adore said, pouring herself another drink. 

“Well, sure,” said Gigi. “But how long is ‘for now’? It’s awards season soon. What are you gonna do for the Globes? Or the Oscars? Leave her home?” 

“I’m probably not even gonna be in town for those,” Vixen told her. “I still have to go back and forth to Chicago for this workshop series that I’m teaching through March.” 

“Okay...what about the Met Gala? That’s in May.” 

“She wouldn’t want to go to that…” Courtney laughed, then caught Vixen’s eye. “Would you?” 

Vixen felt her skin prickle as embarrassment washed over her. Of course, she knew next to nothing about fashion, so she felt uncomfortable admitting it--but the idea of getting all dolled up for one of the fanciest events in the world sounded embarrassingly exciting.

“I...don’t know. Maybe?” She gave Courtney a sheepish little shrug, not ready to commit to this desire. 

Courtney, however, was unfazed. Simply excited at the prospect, saying, “If you’re into it, you should totally come!” 

“Aww, that’s so cute!” Adore exclaimed. “It could be like your coming out thing.” 

“We’d have to find a designer, get you an outfit...” Courtney chewed on her lip, racking her brain to think of who she could call. 

Gigi’s eyes lit up, and she leaned forward. 

“What would you want to wear?! Like, describe your _dream_ ensemble.” 

“Um...I guess...something kind of...romantic? Maybe kind of flowy and feminine but also sophisticated…” Vixen’s cheeks grew hotter. Was she even making sense?

“You know what designer that sounds like?” Gig asked, picking up her mimosa. 

“Yeah. I know exactly who that sounds like,” said Courtney with a groan. “You’re so lucky I love you, baby.”

“You really are.” Gigi smirked.

“Okay, what’s going on? I’m confused,” Adore said, and Vixen nodded in agreement. 

***

Courtney tapped her nails on the arm of the chair as the phone rang. 

“ _Talk fast, I’m dealing with a deadline_ ,” Violet said. 

“Well, hello to you too!” After so many years, Courtney no longer took Violet’s brusque manner personally. It was actually one of those endearing little quirks that got cuter over time, Courtney’s fondness for Violet growing more and more over the years, especially once they began working together on her fashion line, Kaleidoscope, which Violet still consulted on regularly. 

“ _Courtney…_ ” Her voice had that warning quality that told Courtney she would be running out of patience sooner rather than later. _“You know I appreciate you, but I’m genuinely busy-”_

“Okay, okay. So. I know that you probably have your hands full with your job, and your family—”

_“Correct.”_

“—But how would you feel about a little Met Gala commission?” Courtney asked sweetly. 

_“No.”_

“Pleeease, Vi, I’m begging you! Like literally begging,” Courtney said.

_“You don’t have a designer yet? It’s January. Did someone die?”_

Courtney knew she better quickly get to the point. 

“No, of course I do, Christian Siriano is doing mine. But it’s not for me. It’s for Vixen.”

_“Who?”_

“My _girlfriend_.”

_“Oh. Well. Congratulations. I wasn’t aware you had one.”_

“We haven’t advertised it online.”

 _“I probably wouldn’t know if you had,”_ Violet said with a chuckle. 

“Listen. She’s an amazing person, and she deserves something beautiful. I asked her to describe her ideal dress, and it’s everything you do: dreamy, romantic, feminine and sophisticated.”

Violet snorted. “Sounds familiar.”

“So please, Violet, I’ll pay you double.” 

_“Courtney. You know it’s not about the money.”_

“Please, it would mean the world.”

Violet sighed, saying, “ _I really don’t have time..._ ” 

She sounded genuinely regretful, and so Courtney decided to throw out one last Hail Mary.

“Okay, well...what if I bring Melati as my special guest to the Glimmer Three premiere in June?” 

Courtney hoped that particular bargaining chip would work. Mel was still pretty young; maybe it wasn’t a big enough draw. 

When Violet didn’t respond, Courtney quickly added, “Paris _and_ London. You know, if that’s okay with you.”

_“You’re evil.”_

“I think she’d have fun, don’t you?” Courtney asked, voice dripping with honey. 

“ _It would be the thrill of her life,_ ” Violet said, sighing some more. “ _Dammit…I cannot believe I’m agreeing to this-_ ”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! Omigod Vi, this is going to be amazing.”

_“But you have to use a person I approve to get her measurements in L.A., and come here in person in April for a fitting.”_

“An excuse to bring her to Paris for a romantic getaway? Twist my arm.”

“ _Also, I want some sketches of your dress from Christian so that I can make sure that they’ll work together_.” 

“Yes, ma’am!” 

***

“Ughhhhh, it huuurts!” Courtney whined. 

“I know, honey, I’m sorry.” Vixen ran her fingers through Courtney’s hair, wishing there was more she could do to help. Her plane from Chicago had landed two hours ago, and she’d arrived to find her girlfriend somewhat incapacitated, curled up in the fetal position on the sofa. 

Courtney was having horrible cramps--something that apparently rarely happened, but when it did, it hit her like a freight train. And while Vixen had sympathy, she couldn’t help but be amused at what an absolute baby she was being. (Not that Vixen was one to judge, having no experience of her own in the matter, but it did seem a tad dramatic.) Maybe this was what Adore was talking about, she thought, suppressing a laugh. 

Courtney moaned in agony, burying her face into the pillow, and Vixen moved a hand to her back, stroking her gently. 

“Is there anything I can do? What do you need?”

“Chocolate,” came the pathetic reply, muffled by the pillow. “Lots of chocolate.” 

“Heyyy…” 

Courtney turned her face up to Vixen, still in pain but unable to hold back a giggle. 

“That’s not what I meant, but I’ll take it.” She closed her eyes as Vixen leaned down for a sweet, gentle kiss. 

“Heating pad!” she suddenly exclaimed, breaking the kiss

“What?” Courtney blinked up at her. 

“I heard that a heating pad helps. Do you want one? There’s one in the closet from when I hurt my shoulder.” 

“Okay…” 

“Okay.” Vixen started to get up, but Courtney pulled her back down. 

“Wait.” 

“What is it?” 

Courtney squeezed her hand, looking up at her with big puppy eyes, and requested, “Kiss me again.” 

“You got it.” Vixen couldn’t help but smile as she leaned in for another kiss. 

***

Vixen flipped absentmindedly through the channels, Kylie curled in a warm fluffy ball in her lap. She was decompressing after a long day of classes and department meetings, her schedule crammed to the gills since she’d made the regrettable decision not to give up her workshop series in Chicago for a few months. It was good that she’d have more time to train people to take over for her, but she was a bit overloaded. 

The result of all this was a shorter temper than usual, some of her worst habits returning to bite her in the ass. Fortunately, she’d been able to catch herself before she’d really taken anyone’s head off, but today, after snapping at someone in a meeting and then apologizing profusely, she realized that she better plan some relaxation time into her schedule, stat. 

She sighed, hoping once again that her gamble of moving to LA full time later in the Spring would pay off with a tenured position at UCLA. She perked up a bit when she heard Courtney come in, making her way through the house. 

“In the bedroom!” 

Vixen was extremely curious to find out about what was going on with Courtney. She’d been meeting with some executives about NBC about a possible project, and it had gone hours later than expected. Vixen was already home when Courtney texted that she was still there, and wouldn’t be home for dinner. Now, it was almost 9 pm. 

Courtney entered the room with her shoes in her hands, tossing them halfway to the closet and collapsing in bed beside Vixen with a groan. 

“Hi, baby.” Vixen dropped a kiss to the crown of her head. 

“You know, once you let him on the bed, he’s never gonna leave you alone,” Courtney said, reaching over to scratch Kylie behind the ears. 

“He was lonely on the floor,” Vixen explained, and Courtney giggled, snuggling up to her. 

“Uh huh…So how was your day?” 

“Fine, the new syllabus was approved for the Spring quarter and more importantly, what were you doing at NBC for almost 7 hours?” 

“Well...okay. So, apparently...Fallon is leaving, and so they’re looking for a new host for The Tonight Show...” 

“Are you serious?” Vixen exclaimed, sitting up straight. “That’s huge!” 

“I know. But the thing is, I told them that if I was gonna do it, I don’t want it to just be some ordinary late-night show that anyone might do. I would want to make a real difference. I mean, obviously I’ll have to include all the celebrity interviews and pop culture stuff, that’s part of the gig.” 

“Right.” 

“But I also want to _say_ something. Like, for example, including interviews with congress anytime there’s a big vote for a bill coming up about health care or gun control or civil liberties. Or like, talking to activists and organizers, people like you. And, also! Musical numbers!”

Vixen laughed. Her mind was just so bizarre sometimes. 

“Like big, Broadway-style numbers, almost like those old-timey variety shows. Or like, okay, these shows often have cooking segments, which is fun, but I’d want to feature vegan chefs and talk about little replacements people can do to decrease the carbon footprint of their diets, and things that would actually be helpful to people when-”

“Okay, I’m starting to see why the meeting went on so long…” 

“And political debates. But not like, the dumb kind between a Nobel-prize winning scientist and some asshole climate denier. Real, nuanced debates between people who know what they’re fucking talking about.” 

“So...between the super far left and the sort of medium far left?” Vixen guessed. 

“Yes!” Courtney giggled. “See, you get me. And a book club!” 

“Like Oprah?” Vixen reached down to play with her hair while she listened to her rattle off more ideas. 

“Yeah, kind of! I was pitching them this idea where we do interviews with people--not just celebrities but all kinds of people, about books that have really had a profound effect on their life, and then have a membership program in like, a digital library where we can lend out the books for free but the authors are still getting royalties. Also, I want to spotlight ethical brands and employee-owned companies, and have a goal of like, within 2 years, the whole show is sponsored by companies that we can actually stand behind.” 

“It sounds great,” Vixen said. One of the best things about Courtney was her boundless enthusiasm for doing whatever she could to make the world a better place. Even though it sometimes led to her spinning in a million different directions, Vixen appreciated the thought behind it. “Is it like, a done deal? Offer on the table?” 

“Yeah, they made the offer. I just have to decide if I’m gonna take it.” 

“Is there a downside?” 

“Yeah, I mean, I wouldn’t really be able to act anymore, except for maybe some tiny cameos. And touring would be on hold indefinitely. It would be very all-consuming. And it’s a pretty grueling schedule,” Courtney said. “But, on the other hand, it seems like an opportunity to do everything I’ve always wanted.” 

“Sounds like you’ve kind of decided,” Vixen said with a grin.

“Plus it is...so much money,” Courtney confessed, and Vixen burst out laughing. “It is! Like, crazy money. I could become a bona-fide philanthropist.”

“So I could quit my job and become one of those ladies who lunch?” Vixen joked. 

“Or run for office.” 

Vixen’s goofy smile faded immediately. Running for office was a far-off dream she’d shared with Courtney, one of those whispered-in-the-dark confessions that part of her thought might never come true. 

“Are you serious?” 

“That’s the goal, right?” Courtney asked, tilted her head up to gaze at Vixen with soft, shining eyes. 

“I mean...eventually, yes. Someday...”

“Well…” Courtney sat up, turning around and slipping her arms around Vixen’s shoulders. “Obviously, no pressure. But I just want you to know that when you’re ready, I will support you one thousand percent. Talk show money or not.” 

“Yeah?” 

“I can’t think of anyone smarter, or more capable, or more passionate that I would trust with my vote.” 

“I’ll do my best to live up to that.” Vixen smiled, leaning forward to press a kiss to her lips. 

“You already have,” Courtney told her. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Vixen got settled into her new life in LA, and Courtney enlisted Violet’s help for a Met Gala ensemble.  
> This chapter: A romantic weekend in Paris and a star-studded Gala both bring old friends back into Courtney’s life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Rating: Explicit

The plan was for the Met Gala to be their first public appearance together. A sort of coming-out, as Adore put it. 

But all of that went to shit in early April. Vixen had just wrapped up the last of her workshops in Chicago, her friends and family throwing her a huge going-away party, making her promise to visit often. Then, instead of flying to Los Angeles for the Spring term, she found herself sipping champagne on a flight to Paris, where she was meeting Courtney for a Met Gala fitting-turned-romantic-getaway. 

And it would have all gone to plan, probably, if not for the crafty French paparazzi, who caught wind of Courtney being in Paris and began to tail them through the city. 

It had been a gray, drizzly day, the clouds not breaking until early in the evening as the sun was setting, encouraging them to leave their little café and stroll across the Pont Neuf to Square du Vert Galant, hands clasped together, giggling about Courtney’s attempt to get oat milk in her coffee with broken French. 

When Courtney caught Vixen’s face in the warm light, she couldn’t resist pulling her in for a kiss, hands stroking her cheekbones before brushing their lips together, tasting the perfection of the moment, overcome with joy and gratitude for her gorgeous, loving girlfriend. 

The nearby paparazzi went nuts, and that’s when they both realized that they’d been followed. 

“Oops,” Courtney whispered, biting her lip, still unable to let go of Vixen’s face, unable to tear herself away. 

“Cat’s out of the bag, huh?” Vixen said. Fortunately, she didn’t seem too broken up about it. 

“Yeah.” 

“I guess there’s not much we can do about it now.” A smile played on her lips, and Courtney was overcome with the urge to kiss her again. 

It wasn’t until they separated slowly that Courtney thought of a possible solution. 

“We could beat them to it…” 

She pulled out her phone, taking a series of photos, the setting sun and rain-washed buildings around them doing half the work of making the pictures glowingly beautiful. Vixen’s eyes were bright with happiness, and Courtney couldn’t help gazing at her with total adoration, pressing a kiss to her cheek. 

She posted the pictures as they stood right there, captioned with a simple heart, and then put her phone away, taking Vixen’s hand and continuing on their walk like everything was business as usual. 

***

Vixen wasn’t sure what to think when they finally arrived at Violet’s on Saturday morning, an ordinary-enough apartment building. 

“You’re sure this is a legit designer?” she asked, and Courtney grinned at her, pulling her inside. She held a box of pastries and a Glimmer-branded reusable bag full of swag for Violet’s five-year-old daughter, Melati. 

“One of the best I know!” 

When Violet opened the door, Courtney greeted her like a long-lost sibling, pulling her into a fierce hug, kissing her cheeks. Violet seemed to tolerate this, but still let out a relieved sigh as Courtney let go. 

“Violet, this is Vixen!” Courtney said excitedly. 

“Hello. Nice to meet you.” Violet stuck out her hand and shook Vixen’s, very formal and professional. 

“Vix, Violet is basically a sorceress with fabric. I can’t wait for you to see her stuff in person,” Courtney told her, sliding off her shoes. She then let out a happy squeal, spotting a tiny face with big dark eyes poking around the corner bashfully. She bounded forward to greet Melati with a happy, “Bonjour, Melati!” 

Melati’s eyes widened and she disappeared, hiding under a table. 

“Sorry. She’s still processing that Princess Lucie is real, and knows her name. I’ve attempted to explain that you’re an actress, but Sutan keeps sabotaging my attempts,” Violet explained. “Something about keeping the magic alive.” 

Courtney giggled, dropping to her knees and peeking at Melati under the table, singing, “Bonjooour, mon petit chou!”

Vixen had removed her shoes by this point, holding them awkwardly in her hands. 

“You can put your shoes on the top shelf there,” Violet said kindly. “I’m afraid our dog can’t be trusted with anything. I’m still mourning the loss of a pair of Louboutins.” 

Vixen chuckled, placing her shoes (and Courtney’s) carefully onto the shelf, and then followed Violet into the house. 

Melati seemed to have gotten over her initial shyness, jumping into Courtney’s arms and laughing joyfully as Courtney swung her around. 

“Courtney, not in the living room, please,” Violet said, then to her daughter, “ _Pas ici_.” Melati obeyed, sliding down from Courtney’s arms and clinging to her side. 

“Je suis désolé!” Courtney cried dramatically, and Melati giggled. She looked at Vixen and explained, “I know that from Madonna’s ‘Sorry.’”

“Impressive,” Vixen told her, while Violet rolled her eyes. 

“Shall we get started?” Violet asked, guiding them quickly through the apartment and up a small flight of stairs. 

“Where’s Sutan?” 

“In London for the weekend. He sends his regrets.” 

“Aww, bummer.” 

Violet opened the door to her studio, then turned to them with a stern look on her face, addressing Courtney directly. 

“Child rules apply in here. You may look, but don’t touch.” 

“Oui madame!” Courtney said with a salute, then walked inside, immediately exclaiming over a bunch of intricate fabric flowers, picking one up to ask, “Did you make this?!” 

“Courtney! What did I _just_ say?” Violet snatched the flower out of her hand. 

“Sorry. Can’t take her anywhere,” Vixen said. 

“Ooh, I love this beading…” Courtney walked towards the wardrobe rack, Violet nearly diving in front of her to stop her from touching that, too. 

She put her hands on her hips, making Courtney pout playfully, and then leaned down to tell Melati something in French. 

“ _Viens_ ,” said the little girl, pulling Courtney out of the room by the hand. 

“Help, I’m being kidnapped by a tiny little person!” 

“I told her to keep you out of trouble!” Violet called after them, then turned to Vixen with an apologetic look on her face. “I’m sorry about that. 

“It’s fine,” Vixen laughed. “I live with her, so I’m pretty used to it.” 

Violet chuckled under her breath, and walked to the wardrobe rack to unzip a few garment bags. 

“If you’ll please disrobe, we can get started. I can give you some hangers for your things if you need.” 

“Oh...that’s okay.” Vixen was wearing skinny jeans and a black t-shirt. Not really clothes she’d normally hang. She began to remove them slowly, feeling only slightly awkward. 

“I’m sorry that we haven’t had a chance for more consultations, but with the distance, and my job, and my family…” 

“Please don’t apologize! I’m so grateful for all the work you’re done.” Vixen turned around, down to her bra and panties. 

“The top has a built in bustier, so no bra is needed.” Violet held it out, and Vixen nearly gasped. 

The sketches had been lovely, but this was absolutely stunning, a flowing sleeveless top with gorgeous pearl and gold beading in cascading floral patterns. When you looked closer, it became apparent that the beads were in fact pearl buttons, gold cufflinks and other menswear elements. 

“Given your desires, and my own aesthetic, it was a bit of a challenge to incorporate the menswear theme, but I did my best. I still have a bit of beading to do, but it’s mostly done.” 

“It’s incredible,” Vixen said, unclasping her bra. “Really, so far beyond what I was expecting.” 

Violet gave her a satisfied nod, hanging the top and lifting another garment from the rack. 

“Shall we try on the trousers?” 

‘Trousers’ wouldn’t exactly have been Vixen’s way of describing the bottoms: a pair of draped, beautifully moving pants, with a satin strip down the side reminiscent of a tuxedo. After showing her, Violet quickly turned them inside out and then held them out for Vixen to step into. 

It was a very strange experience. This woman that she barely knew dressing her, something she hadn’t experienced since she was a small child and her mom helped her into her clothes for preschool. She tried not to be awkward about it, happy that she’d at least remembered to wear nude panties today. 

Violet stepped back, examining her with a critical eye, before picking up a set of pins and kneeling. Vixen stood as still as possible, trying not to be self-conscious. This was Violet’s job; she probably dealt with people’s bodies on a daily basis. The fact that her tits were out surely didn’t faze her, so why should Vixen feel weird? 

She worked quickly and carefully, getting up to examine the pants from multiple angles. Her long dark hair was pulled away from her face, into a high ponytail, and as Vixen studied her serious expression, she realized that what could be read as coldness was actually just deep concentration, a passion for her work that made Vixen feel right at home. 

They tried on the top next, the heavy and intricate beading telling Vixen that it was by far the most expensive garment she’d even had on her body. It was amazing. 

Vixen watched herself in the floor-length mirror, turning slightly, admiring how beautiful the whole ensemble looked. She started fantasizing about what she was gonna do with her hair, when Violet’s voice cut into her thoughts. 

“Have you thought about shoes?” 

“Oh, um...not really. What do you think?” 

“I can give you some suggestions if you like,” Violet offered, and Vixen smiled at her. 

“That would be great! Thank you.” 

Violet was walking around the room, again examining the look from multiple angles, once in awhile stepping forward to place a pin here or mark something down on her notepad. At one point, she gave a thoughtful nod, then said, “You carry this look well. How do you feel about it?” 

“Oh, um...it’s beautiful!” Vixen could tell by the thoughtful way she said it that a compliment like that from Violet must be rare and sincere. She felt comfortable enough to continue, admitting, “I’m a little nervous--not about the clothes! Just...I’ve never been to anything like the Met Gala in my life.” 

“That’s understandable, but I wouldn’t worry,” Violet assured her. “The most nerve-wracking part is the red carpet, and you’ll be with Courtney, who I think might actually like it.” 

“I know she likes it,” Vixen laughed. 

“Right.” Violet shook her head. “I will never understand her.” 

***

The rest of their time in Paris (well, the day and a half before they had to fly back to L.A.) was like a dream. Of course, their social media had been blowing up like crazy ever since posting those pictures, and Courtney did nothing to quell the wild speculation, posting more pictures, as well as tweeting mysterious, romantic things like “I get to wake up to her every morning. #gratitude” and “When she’s breathing beside me, I’m home.” 

But for the most part, they ignored all of the messages, all of the questions, and simply enjoyed the fresh spring air and the beautiful city, doing their best to avoid the ever-present paparazzi until they realized that it was no use, and just rolled with it. 

On Monday, Courtney woke up to clear, blue skies and sunlight filtering in through the gauzy curtains. She rolled over, brushing away a curl that had fallen across Vixen’s face, smiling at her eyes fluttered open. 

“Good morning,” she said, placing a soft kiss on Vixen’s cheek.

“Morning…” Vixen rubbed her eyes, yawning, then snuggled against Courtney’s body, seeking out the warmth of her skin. 

“You bummed to be going back home today?” Courtney asked, and Vixen shook her head. 

“Mm-mm,” she said, voice slightly muffled against Courtney’s neck, then added. “How could I be bummed? I’m going back with you.” 

Courtney inhaled sharply, caught off guard by her sleepy sweetness, and pulled her in tighter. 

“I love you so much,” she whispered fiercely into her hair, and Vixen gave a small, adorable sigh. 

*** 

There was really no reason to be this nervous, Vixen thought. It wasn’t like she was a real celebrity. The cameras and attention would be on Courtney and Honey, the actual movie stars, not on her. 

Nevertheless, she couldn’t deny the rush of butterflies as she sat beside Courtney in the car. The ensemble Violet designed fit her perfectly, and upon her suggestion, she’d paired it with some Miu Miu stilettos, ruby lipstick and a jeweled hair clip in her brand new weave--long, rich, dark brown hair with chestnut highlights, styled in meticulous Marcel waves that made her feel like a goddess. She caught Courtney’s eyes, grinning at her. 

Her girlfriend was stunning as usual, her black, high-necked, open-backed tuxedo gown just the right balance of revealing sexiness and teasing modesty. The full skirt had a slit almost the whole way up that you didn’t see until she was in motion, and her blonde hair was tucked under, giving her an almost masculine illusion. Her minimalist jewelry consisted of a simple diamond bracelet, the only splash of color her shiny, short, deep red nails. 

“You look very classy,” Vixen commented. 

“Yeah?” Courtney asked. “I don’t know how I feel about such an extreme lack of color.” 

“No, it’s good.” 

“Yeah,” Honey chimed in, from where she sat with her date across from them in the limo. “You need to give the rainbow explosion a break once in awhile.” 

“Well...I do have pink and yellow panties on,” Courtney admitted, and they all laughed. 

“Of course you do,” Vixen said. 

“I mean no one will see them!” she exclaimed. “Probably. Unless the night gets real crazy.” 

“Can we make bets?” asked Honey’s date, Michael, making Vixen giggle. She’d only met him a few minutes before, but she already liked him.

“Let’s not,” quipped a woman tersely from the front seat. She was a publicist from Disney whose name Vixen kept forgetting, instead just thinking of her as The Dragon. 

“Oh, right,” Courtney said, reaching for Vixen’s hand as they approached the Met. “I guess since we’re here on Disney’s dime, I need to be on good behavior.” 

“Only until we get back to the hotel, though, right?” Vixen asked, and Courtney shot her a naughty grin. 

“We’ll see…” 

Honey and Michael exited the car first, the photographers going nuts over her stunning white pinstripe suit, tailored to perfection. 

“Ready?” Courtney asked, and Vixen nodded. 

The Dragon was already shooting instructions at them. Well, mostly at Courtney, but it made her head spin a little. 

Before they got out, Courtney leaned in and whispered, “If she pulls me away, stick with Michael. He’ll take care of you and make sure you guys stay close.” 

Vixen laughed, steeling her nerves, feeling weirdly like she had back in junior high before a basketball game. _Here we go_...

***

Once Courtney was finally finished with her press obligations, she turned to Vixen with a happy, relieved sigh. She couldn’t help but once again think about just how gorgeous she looked: the cream and ivory ensemble Violet had designed made her dark skin glow, and she’d opted for an understated, barely-there look with her eye makeup--all lashes and just a hint of shimmer. Plus those lips. So red and full and kissable...Courtney could barely wait to get her alone later and just ruin it. 

First, though, they had to get through this gala. Courtney took Vixen’s hand and led her inside, where they wandered around together. They looked through the exhibit, and exchanged pleasant, mundane small talk with a mind-boggling number of people. Vixen completely cracked Courtney up with her impression of one of the Vogue editors, and then for a little while, they played a game where they pretended to be museum docents, describing the various pieces to each other with the most pretentious language they could come up with. 

While Vixen used the restroom, Courtney found one of the bars and got them a couple of drinks. Champagne always went straight to her head, but she figured that if there was ever a place to get a bit silly, this was it. 

“Yes, you heard me. One champagne and a tequila sunrise,” said a familiar voice, and Courtney turned, a big smile on her face. 

“Bianca!” 

Bianca’s gruff expression melted into a grin as she reached forward to give Courtney a hug. 

“Hey there! Nice dress!” she held Courtney by the waist to get a good look. “Siriano, right?” 

“Yeah. And I see you really took the menswear theme to heart.” 

Bianca was wearing one of her favorite silhouettes: a boat-necked, figure-hugging, floor length gown with a trumpet skirt. It was black and beaded and of course looked great on her, but had nothing whatsoever to do with the theme. 

“Listen. Anna Wintour can’t fucking tell me what to wear!” she barked, and Courtney threw back her head with laughter. 

“Never change, B.” 

“Not much danger of that at this point,” Bianca said, accepting the drinks from the bartender. “I’m glad I ran into you. We found your date, but-” 

“We?” Dread filled her stomach like a lead balloon as Bianca directed her gaze to where Vixen stood, talking to none other than Miss Fame herself. Seeing them, Courtney had a lightheaded rush of fear that she hadn’t experienced for almost ten years, and she inhaled sharply. 

“What’s the matter?” Bianca asked. “You think Fame’s gonna eat her?” 

“I…” Courtney couldn’t explain it. How the anxiety that she felt as a 21-year-old could still return in the presence of that woman. She knew that logically, everything was fine. In recent years, things between her and Fame had gotten downright friendly. And she appeared to be having a perfectly pleasant conversation with Vixen, clad in one of her signature 50-shades-of-white ensembles. 

“Relax,” Bianca said, chuckling softly, forearm resting on Courtney’s shoulder. “Our brides are fine. They actually look cute together, don’t you think?” 

A laugh bubbled up from Courtney’s chest; they did look awfully bridal, especially standing together. She turned to Bianca, a rush of gratitude coloring her cheeks, thrilled by her tacit approval. She pulled her in for a hug, saying, “They do.” 

“Aww, look who else just arrived,” Bianca said, and Courtney turned again. 

Raja and Raven, in complementary outfits of royal purple and gray, had joined the little group. 

“Okay, now we really _do_ have to save her,” Courtney said, rushing towards them, Bianca laughing behind her. 

***

When they finally arrived back at their hotel, the first thing they did was kick off their hideously uncomfortable shoes and strip down. The hotel had sent up a huge basket of luxury bath products, and Courtney suggested filling the jacuzzi tub and dumping all of it in. The result was a fragrant tub with so much bath oil and moisturizing products that their skin immediately became slick and slippery. 

Vixen relaxed against the side of the tub, one of the powerful jets aimed at her lower back, and another at her feet. Courtney leaned against her, eyes closed as Vixen’s fingers carded through her hair, slowly removing bobby pin after bobby pin until her hair hung down in stiff waves. She dunked her head under the water, scrubbing to remove the residual mousse and hairspray before coating her hair with a thick layer of conditioning mask and cuddling up once again. 

“It was more fun than I thought it would be,” Vixen said, breaking the comfortable silence, fingers trailing up Courtney’s arm. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah. Less stuffy. Not that I’d want to do it often but, I had a pretty good time.” 

Courtney smiled, leaning her head back to rest on Vixen’s shoulder. 

“I did too…” she said, then added almost as an afterthought, “Bianca approves of you.” 

“Oh yeah? Did you need her approval?” Vixen asked. It was a casual enough question, but it still seemed to make Courtney pause. _Did_ she need Bianca’s approval? Vixen waited for her to respond, realizing that she’d be okay with any answer. After all, Bianca was an important person in her life. 

“No...not exactly…but it was still nice.” Courtney smiled sheepishly, and twisted around slightly to tell Vixen, “I guess maybe I didn’t realize how much I didn’t need it until I got it.” 

“Fair enough,” Vixen laughed, dropping a kiss to Courtney’s shoulder. 

“So...I’m glad you liked it.”

“I did. Although I think I underestimated my ability to wear stilettos for that many hours without dying.” 

“Aw, do your feet hurt, baby?” cooed Courtney. She slipped from Vixen’s arms to the opposite side of the tub, where her feet were. 

“They’re killing me…”

Courtney took Vixen’s feet into her lap, and began to give them a gentle massage. Vixen’s eyes fell closed blissfully, luxuriating in the warm water and tender caresses. Courtney began with her feet, but after awhile, moved up to her ankles and calves. Vixen nearly fell asleep three times, but finally blinked her eyes open, pulling Courtney towards her for a kiss. 

“Can I do something for you now?” she murmured, and Courtney lifted her head to give her a heavy-lidded smirk. 

“Let’s get out of here and see…” 

“I was thinking like, helping you rinse this shit out of your hair, but...” Vixen touched her hair, still covered with that thick mask. 

“Oh fuck,” Courtney giggled. “I guess we better do that first.” 

Vixen smiled at her, taking the handheld nozzle off the hook and turning it on. She tested the water with her hand, gesturing for Courtney to turn around, and then quickly rinsed her hair, fingertips scratching at her scalp. When she turned it off, she pressed a kiss to Courtney’s neck. 

“Come on. Let’s go get bath oil all over those fancy sheets…” 

“Sold!” 

***

There was something different in Vixen’s eyes tonight as she hovered over Courtney on the bed. She was usually content to be pampered and guided--not submissive exactly, but certainly leaning in that direction. Tonight though, Courtney shivered in anticipation, looking up at her hungry brown eyes, shining dark in the dim light, every once in awhile catching a glint of gold. 

They’d been at it for awhile, having tumbled into bed after their bath, Vixen’s mouth traveling all over Courtney’s heated skin. She’d lost track of time completely as Vixen made her tremble and whimper, getting her all worked up, only to tease her cruelly. Her fingertips now danced up Courtney’s thighs, light as a feather, making her breath catch in her throat. Courtney reached up towards her, one hand on her waist, another one her face, thumb stroking her cheek. 

The corner of Vixen’s mouth twitched, becoming a smirk as she looked down at Courtney. One finger began to trace slow patterns along her collarbone, little circles getting bigger and loopier over her chest. Courtesy whimpered, back arching, trying unsuccessfully to pull her body down. 

“Trying to tell me something, baby?” The pad of her finger circled one of Courtney’s nipples teasingly. 

In response, Courtney arched up again. 

“I want you,” she said, failing to suppress the pathetic need in her voice. 

Vixen crawled forward slightly, pressing a thigh up against her pussy, giving her something to grind wetly against. It was good, so good that Courtney gasped in pleasure, Vixen’s thigh flexing against her as fingers continued toying with her tits. But soon, it wasn’t enough, and Courtney was pulling Vixen’s hips down, head falling back to expose her throat. 

Vixen licked up her neck, layering kisses against her hammering pulse point. Courtney’s legs spread open, the gentle pressure of Vixen’s weight pressing her down into the mattress. 

Courtney loved Vixen’s body. She had small tits that fit perfectly in Courtney’s hands, long slender limbs, and the most buttery soft skin she’d ever felt, especially fresh out of the bath. She loved to touch her, to feel her and taste her and kiss her all over. 

She was painfully aware, though, that there were things she needed to be sensitive about when they were together. Even though she and Vixen had jumped into bed together on their first date, she’d spent a lot of their excruciating months apart asking gentle, probing questions about what she liked, what she didn’t, if there was anything that made her uncomfortable. Vixen was a bit shy at first, so Courtney didn’t push too hard, but every once in awhile, if she’d had enough wine, she would open up quite a bit, giving Courtney real insight into her fantasies. 

And then of course, once they’d been able to really take their time and explore with each other, Courtney discovered a whole world of possibilities. Where she was most sensitive, how her fingers flexed and then curled slowly into fists when she liked something. How she was generally more interested in gentle, loving touches than hard, orgasm-focused penetration. 

Courtney was careful to go slowly, and to follow her lead for anything below the waist. She didn’t want to make any assumptions about her body, or make her feel fetishized - but she also wanted to make sure to express how beautiful and sexy she found every part of her. It was a fine line, a balancing act that Courtney wasn’t sure she always got right. 

She knew, for example, that Vixen preferred the term “girldick” and was partial to having it treated more like a clit - kissed and licked and rubbed and gently sucked. And Courtney was happy to oblige, loving the feel and the taste of her, how her cum had a faint sweetness to it. But recently, she’d surprised Courtney with a whispered confession in the dark that she wasn’t expecting. 

“I’ve been thinking that maybe I want to try...topping,” Vixen said, hiding her face in Courtney’s hair, adorably bashful. “I mean, it’s so hot when you do it, and it doesn’t make me think of you as any less of a woman, and so…” 

“You’re 100% woman. Every bit of you,” Courtney whispered back, but she’d also been a tiny bit nervous. After all, the last time anyone had tried penetrating her had been a bit of a disaster, and ever since then, she hadn’t wanted to revisit it. But on the other hand, she loved Vixen so much, and trusted her, and so maybe it was time to rethink her own boundaries. 

“I don’t know if I can, though,” Vixen then added. “I mean, it doesn’t get hard the way it used to…” 

“We can figure it out,” Courtney had said, kissing her, wrapping her up into a sleepy embrace. But the conversation never went any farther. Vixen hadn’t brought it up again, and Courtney didn’t really think any more about it. Until right now. 

And tonight, there was something so fucking sexy about the way Vixen rutted against her, soft little sighs leaving her as she rolled her hips. Courtney grew wetter and wetter, fingers digging into her firm ass, pulling her closer. Vixen lifted her head, interrupting a deep, messy kiss to look into Courtney’s glazed eyes. 

“Is this okay? Are you…” 

“It’s perfect…You’re perfect.” Courtney could feel the soft tip of her girldick pushing against her, and she arched up, welcomed it deeper with her hand, loving the feel of Vixen getting closer and closer with every thrust. 

It was so different from anything Courtney had ever experienced; so flexible and warm. It was a gentle kind of fullness, nothing rigid or demanding or painful like it had been for Courtney in the past. Courtney hugged Vixen’s hips with her thighs, hands sliding up her back, raking over her shoulder blades and back down to her waist.

“Baby, this is so hot,” Courtney whimpered, and then Vixen angled forward so that she was rubbing vigorously against Courtney’s clit, making her moan. “Fuuuck…” 

Courtney could feel herself getting close, right on the verge. She captured Vixen’s lips in another kiss, sucking hard on her bottom lip and then tangling their tongues together. She panted into her mouth, snaking one hand down between her ass cheeks to stroke her, eliciting a little gasp from Vixen’s thoat, a familiar sound that told Courtney she was close too. 

As Vixen’s hips pumped faster and faster, Courtney tried to hang on, but knuckles brushing over her stiff nipples was the last straw, and suddenly she was racked with ecstatic pleasure, wave after wave hitting her. By the end, she was barely moving, just clinging to Vixen’s body as her muscles convulsed, ankles locked together to keep her as close as possible. 

The intense, messy kisses soon turned slow and gentle again as Courtney slowly caught her breath, bodies still sandwiched together. 

“Wow…” 

“Uh-huh...” 

“That was different,” Vixen said, lips brushing against Courtney’s temple. 

“Did you like it?” Courtney asked, fingers dancing up Vixen’s spine. 

“...that might be an understatement.” 

“Yeah, it was pretty...amazing,” Courtney giggled, nodding, catching her gaze. Her brown eyes shone softly in the dim light. “I love you so much.” 

“Me too, baby.” 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter: Courtney and Vixen went public, attended the Met Gala, and had a bit of a wild night back in the hotel.  
> This chapter: A happy ending. Or a happy beginning, depending on your perspective.

The morning after the Met Gala, Vixen awoke to the scent of coffee and fresh, buttery croissants as the room service was being wheeled into their room. She stretched, only slightly embarrassed when she realized that she was naked under the thin sheet, especially when she looked over and saw Courtney sitting propped up on a mountain of pillows, tits out, scrolling through her phone. 

“Good morning. Putting on a show for the hotel staff, I see,” Vixen commented, voice still groggy with sleep. 

Courtney laughed and glanced up from her phone. “He doesn’t care.” 

As if to prove her point, he promptly turned and headed out, leaving them to their breakfast. 

“Mmhmm.” Vixen shook her head, pressing a kiss against Courtney’s shoulder. She then climbed over her body to pour herself a cup of coffee. After taking a long sip, she spotted a glass of green juice that had to be Courtney’s. She picked it up, giving it a sniff, wrinkling her nose at the cut grass scent. “Want your horrible green juice?” 

“‘Kay,” Courtney said, still distracted by her phone.

“And what are you so engrossed in, hmm?” 

“Sorry.” Courtney put the phone down and accepted the juice glass with a grateful smile. “Thank you. I know it’s really basic, but I was just checking out social media. You know, to see what people were saying about the clothes from last night.” 

“Ahh. Anything interesting?” Vixen asked nonchalantly. She wasn’t used to having her appearance judged by strangers, and even though she wanted to say that she didn’t care about that, part of her was dying for approval. 

“Yeah, actually.” A smile played on Courtney’s lips as she looked up at Vixen. “I guess...we hadn’t really realized how...bridal our outfits looked. Especially together.” 

“Oh yeah,” Vixen said. 

“But the thing is, people seem really into it.” Courtney took a delicate sip. “All the posts and comments are hashtagged with ‘marryher.’” 

Vixen laughed, searching through the tray for a pastry. “So then, they liked it?” 

“Yeah, the consensus is overwhelmingly positive,” Courtney said. After a few moments, she ventured, “Do you ever think about...getting married?” 

Of all the ways Vixen imagined that conversation starting, sitting hunched over on her heels, fully naked, with a mouthful of croissant, was not one of them. She turned to Courtney slowly, eyes wide. 

“Do...do you?” 

A coy grin lit up Courtney’s face. “Sometimes. Sometimes I think about...you know, having a family with you.” 

Vixen took a large sip of coffee to swallow down the bite still in her mouth. Her eyes locked with Courtney’s, a feeling of tingling joy spreading throughout her body. 

She pictured it, just briefly: the two of them standing up in front of their friends and families, professing their love for everyone to hear. But then more than that...a marriage. An actual partnership where they supported each other, where they encouraged each other’s dreams and challenged each other to strive for more. A family. Maybe even kids, who would test their patience and mess up the house and demand that they open up their hearts even more. She found herself a bit choked up at the thought. 

“What about you?” Courtney asked then, voice soft and almost timid, like she was afraid to scare Vixen off. 

“I just did,” Vixen whispered back. 

“...and?” 

She smiled, heart feeling full to bursting, and the expression on Courtney’s face seemed to mirror her own. Dazzling, radiant happiness, giddy excitement about what their lives could be. 

Vixen lunged forward, tangling her hands into Courtney’s hair, kissing her over and over until their lips were swollen, hearts hammering in sync. When they finally separated, the giddy expression was still there. Vixen pulled away the hair that had fallen into her face, tossing it over her shoulder. 

“Wow, nice toss…” said Courtney. 

“I know. This hair makes me feel like a porn star.” 

“Oh yeah? Do you like that?” Courtney asked. 

Vixen let out a scoff before lowering her eyes and admitting, “...Maybe a little.” 

Courtney laughed, pushing her onto her back. 

“Okay, porn star, show me what you’ve got...”

***

Later, on the plane back to LA, Vixen couldn’t help the smile that pulled at her lips when she looked over at Courtney, in a neon pink puffer jacket, glittery headphones, space buns, and pants covered in tiny little rainbows. She imagined taking her to a faculty dinner dressed like that, and the thought made her laugh out loud. 

Courtney looked up. “What’s so funny?” she asked, reaching for Vixen’s hand. 

“Nothing. You’re just...really cute.” 

Courtney’s face lit up in a sunny smile, and she pressed Vixen’s palm to her lips. 

“So are you.” 

Vixen gazed at her pensively for a few more moments before saying, “I think we should do it. If...if you want.” 

“Do what?” asked Courtney, head tilted. 

Vixen cleared her throat, suddenly a little self-conscious. This certainly wasn’t the most romantic proposal. Maybe she should have thought it through more. 

“...Vix? Do what?” Courtney played gently with her fingers. 

“Um...get married?” Vixen bit her lip, a little embarrassed. “Do you want to get married?” 

Courtney let out a happy squeal, throwing her arms around Vixen’s neck. “Yes!” 

“I’m sorry,” Vixen said, muffled by her jacket. “I probably should have gotten on one knee or something.” 

“I don’t care about that,” Courtney said. She cupped Vixen’s cheeks with her hands, pressing their foreheads together. “I just...can’t wait to be your wife.” 

***

The wedding was in June, a little over a year later, just after Vixen finished teaching her Spring term. They chose a sprawling castle in the Czech Republic for the location, surrounded by gorgeous rolling hills covered in leafy green trees. It was lush and beautiful and remote enough to keep most of the paparazzi away (except for the photographers that Detox hired, per his exclusive deal with the brides, and the camera crew from The Tonight Show who were making little daily videos to send in while the guest hosts filled in for Courtney). 

It was hilarious to Vixen to see Courtney living her full Princess Fantasy. Usually, she was so laid back and down-to-earth and insistent that she was just a regular girl. Not this time, though, as she agonized over every detail, sparing no expense--including first class airfare for all of their friends and family, multiple lavish brunches, dinners, excursions and afterparties, and more flowers than Vixen had ever seen in her life. 

When she questioned, in the early planning stages after catching a horrified glimpse at the initial budget, if maybe they should cut back, Courtney’s answer was, “Listen, I don’t know about you, but I’m only planning to do this once.” 

Vixen sighed, explaining, “It’s not about that, Court. I just worry that this whole thing...it’s so extravagant, it’ll look...the optics are bad. I’m trying to talk about basic income and economic justice and community building, and this kind of display is just-” 

“Okay, okay,” Courtney relented. She sifted through the plans spread out on the table, brow furrowed. “I guess we could cut...um…” 

Vixen waited for the suggestion, biting her tongue, running through all the potential cuts in her head. _The private planes? The bachelorette weekend in Greece? About 75% of the absolutely ostentatious flower arrangements?_

Courtney, on the other hand, looked like a child who’d just had a scoop of ice cream knocked clean off her cone. 

“I’m really not trying to rain on your parade, babe,” Vixen told her. 

“I know you’re not. And I get what you’re saying...I’ll figure it out.” 

Vixen pressed a kiss firmly against her mouth. “I know you will.” 

Later that evening, Vixen was greeted at the door by her very excited fiancée who sat her down on the couch to propose a new plan. 

“What about this...for every dollar we spend on the wedding, we donate a dollar to the charity of your choosing?” Her bright eyes sparkled, clearly proud of herself. 

“Uhh…” 

“That way!” Courtney continued, clasping her hands together, “If I go overboard, it’s a win win!” 

She fluttered her lashes, waiting to see what Vixen would think of her ingenious new plan. 

“I mean, it’s definitely a nice idea, but is it enough incentive to keep costs reasonable?” She raised an eyebrow challengingly. 

“Okay, for every dollar I spend, two can go to charity.” 

“You’re a terrible negotiator.” 

“Vix…” 

Vixen took in her hopeful eyes for a few long moments before exhaling. “Okay, deal.” 

Courtney bounced into her lap with a delighted laugh. “Lovely doing business with you, Professor Taylor.” 

“You’re impossible, you know that?” Vixen said, smiling against her. 

“But you love me?” 

“Yes. Unfortunately.” Vixen nibbled along her collarbone and up her jaw, coaxing out contented little sighs, and finally capturing her lips in a tender kiss. 

So, slightly begrudgingly, Vixen went along with all of Courtney’s grandest plans. After awhile, she even started to get into the planning spirit, especially once it was time to start sampling cakes and planning menus. She put her foot down about a vegan wedding cake, (“my family would disown me!”) which of course led to Courtney’s genius two cakes idea. 

Ultimately, though, Vixen had fun. She was too swamped with her first full year at UCLA to stress over the details, happy to simply weigh in on the things that mattered to her, like the music and food and her dress, and check out when it came to the rest. A week before the ceremony, Courtney flew to the venue with Brie, her brother Ben, and the event planner to make sure everything was perfect. 

It wasn’t until Vixen was on the plane to Paris 2 days later, grades submitted for all of her classes, Asia on one side and Monet across the aisle, that it really, finally hit her: she was getting _married_. 

The thought was so sudden that it actually made her gasp, and Monet, always a nervous flyer, immediately turned to her with alarm. 

“What? Did you feel something? What’s wrong?” she fretted, and Vixen shook her head. 

“No, nothing like that, I just. You guys...by this time next week, I’m going to be married. I’m gonna be someone’s wife.” 

“You’re just now realizing that?” Monet asked, one eyebrow raised. 

“I think we better cut her off,” Asia said, gesturing to her glass of chardonnay. 

“Ha ha,” Vixen replied, rolling her eyes. “But really. Come on. This is _huge_. Isn’t it?” 

The absolute enormity of the situation was causing a lump to form in her throat, tears stinging her eyes. 

“It sure is, kiddo.” Asia leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. “You’ve come a long way from that skinny little kid crying on the floor of my dorm room.” 

“I know!” Vixen exclaimed, tears beginning to trickle down her cheek. She sniffled. 

“Yeah, now she’s a skinny professor who cries in first class. Here, girl…” Monet reached across the aisle to pass a couple of napkins to her. “Wipe those tears. You’re living the dream.” 

“Oh shit, I am,” Vixen laughed. 

***

Somehow, Courtney had charmed Violet into making not only her dress, but Vixen’s too. (“That way they’ll be sure to be cohesive!”) 

And so, they took an almost 24-hour stopover in Paris as an excuse for a fitting. Vixen was thrilled with the final dress, thanking Violet profusely for all her work and telling her that she’d see her in a few days before hitting the town with her girls for a little last-minute bachelorette night. 

They had an absolute blast. By then, Monique and Mayhem had arrived, along with a couple of her favorite cousins and a new UCLA colleague who knew how to party like a rock star. They took full advantage of the VIP access that Courtney had arranged, Veuve flowing all night like water.

They may have overdid it a little, because the next day, while Courtney dragged her all over the castle grounds to show her the various locations, Vixen had a pounding headache. They ended up in the garden where the reception would take place, lights already being strung up, seating chart up on a posterboard next to a collage of the flower arrangements. 

“So...what do you think? Is it too much?” Courtney asked, hilariously, given the fucking castle towering over her shoulder. 

“Should I even ask how much money you’re gonna be sending to the NAACP and Grassroots Law?” Vixen asked, tucking a lock of blonde hair behind her ear. 

“You mean how much _we’re_ sending,” Courtney said. 

“Dodging the question.” 

“A lot…” 

“Mmm…” Vixen looked around once more before wrapping her arms around Courtney’s waist. “Well...it’s beautiful.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” She pressed a kiss to the crown of Courtney’s head. 

***

Vixen only had a few more things to do before she could really take the summer off, and she was determined to finish them so that she could be fully present for the wedding and, maybe more importantly, the honeymoon. So the morning before the rehearsal dinner, she opted to skip the brunch buffet and finish her notes on a grant proposal. 

She was almost done when Courtney returned to the room, flinging herself down on the four-poster, canopied king bed with a dramatic sigh, arm covering her eyes. Vixen looked up, amused by her theatrics. 

“Problems, dear?” 

Courtney groaned. 

“Don’t tell me that the caviar is sub-par. The duke and duchess will never let us hear the end of it!” Vixen teased, and Courtney sat up, a cross look on her face. “Sorry. What’s wrong?” 

“My dad is upset. I mean he’s not _saying_ he’s upset but he’s been bitching to Ben and I don’t know why he didn’t say anything about it _months_ ago!” 

“I assume this is about the whole ‘being walked down the aisle by our moms’ thing?” Vixen guessed. 

“Yeah. And I thought he understood! I mean it’s a feminist statement! You’d think he’d appreciate that! He ferments his own soybeans to make homemade tofu, for christ’s sake.” 

“You don’t think marrying a woman is enough of a feminist statement?” 

“Well, you’re not being walked down the aisle by _your_ dad!” Courtney reasoned. 

“Yeah, but I’m not close to my dad. He’s lucky he’s even invited.” 

“Well…that’s why I made him, you know-”

“A bridesmaid?” 

“We’re not calling it that!” Courtney sighed. “Omigod, this is so stressful.” 

Vixen rose from the desk and walked to her fiancée on the bed, kneeling beside her. She was so beautiful, and so smart, and so stubborn when it came to taking the easy way out of this type of thing. 

“Why not just let him walk with you and your mum? It’ll make him happy,” Vixen reasoned gently.

“But then the bridal parties won’t be equal! Who’ll walk with Monet?”

“You can let Adore walk with two people from my side.” 

Courtney paused before giggling, “That _is_ slightly poetic.” 

“Do you feel better?” Vixen pressed a kiss to her shoulder and settled against the velvet pillows. 

“Yeah, I think that’s a reasonable solution. Thank you,” Courtney sighed. She curled up into Vixen’s arms, head resting comfortably on her shoulder, eyes falling closed. Vixen began to card fingers through her hair. 

“No problem, baby.” 

“Sorry I’m being such a pain. Are you sure you still want to marry me?” 

“Ummm...” Vixen pretended to think, and Courtney scowled up at her, pretending to be angry. After a few moments, they both started laughing. 

“You really are the best,” Courtney proclaimed, swinging a leg over Vixen to straddle her. 

She was caught off guard at first, hands seeking out Courtney’s waist automatically, gazing up at her, heart beginning to pound in that all too familiar way as their lips met in a slow, leisurely kiss. It took a few moments for her brain to catch up with her body. 

“Before this goes any farther…” Vixen cleared her throat. 

“Yeah?” Courtney murmured against her neck. 

“Don’t you want to tell your dad he’s being upgraded?” 

“I’ll tell him later,” Courtney said, teeth sinking into Vixen’s pulse point until she produced a breathy whimper. 

“Babe...I still have to finish that proposal…” But even as Vixen spoke, she could feel her resolve weakening, the pleasant weight of Courtney’s body pressing down on hers too enticing to resist. 

“Right this second?” Courtney asked, big eyes blinking down at her. 

“I guess it can wait a little,” Vixen finally said, flipping Courtney over onto her back. 

***

“Hold still,” said Violet, scrutinizing Courtney from every possible angle. It was another masterpiece, the wedding dress of Courtney’s wildest dreams: a big ball gown with a structured, corseted bodice covered with intricate embroidery and silk flowers in bright, rainbow colors that spilled down the skirt. Like someone had thrown a bucket of Pride Parade on a princess gown, but in the classiest, most Violet way possible. All Courtney wanted was to spin and twirl like a little kid. 

And of course, Violet’s face had that expression she always wore while working. The one where it was impossible to tell what she was thinking. 

“Violet, not to sound ungrateful-” 

“What?” Violet’s head snapped up, but Courtney continued. 

“But you can’t _look_ at a bride like that. You’re making me fucking _nervous_ ,” Courtney said, foot stomping slightly on the floor. 

“Violet, please just tell her she looks pretty so that we can get the show on the road,” said Ben, tossing back the rest of his champagne. “Some of us want to get to the party toute suite!” 

“Sounds like that’s of the utmost importance.” Violet rolled her eyes. “Courtney, you look gorgeous—” 

“ _Thank_ y-”

“—But I’m trying to check your seams and you’re as fidgety as a toddler. Stand _still_.” 

“Exactly what you want to hear on your wedding day,” Courtney laughed, resuming the position Violet told her to hold. 

“Hire someone else next time if you want sweet nothings,” Violet said, kneeling down to fix a hem that wasn’t falling properly. “You know who I am.”

“I do.” 

“You do.” Violet smiled. “Melati’s very excited to be a part of the big day, by the way. She’s concerned about doing everything right like a big girl, though.”

Courtney looked over to the corner, where Melati sat on Adore’s lap, the two of them happily bonding over a tray of croissants that had been laid out for the bridal party. Melati was going to be a flower girl, along with Vixen’s cousin, something the 6-year-old would think of as one of her major claims to fame for years to come. 

“Aww, I am too!” Courtney said. “Tell her that she can always follow Mandy if she forgets where to go.” 

“Okay.” Violet stood up, brushing off her hands. “I think you’re ready.” 

“Really?” Courtney’s stomach twisted with excitement. 

“Yeah. I’m officially done. Promise to take care of my daughter while I find my seat?”

“Wait, Vi. Um...how’s Vix doing?” Courtney asked. She knew that Violet had done her last checks on Vixen first, and was dying to know how she was feeling. Was she nervous? They hadn’t spoken since dinner the night before, both of them spending the night with their respective bridal parties. 

“The outfit is impeccable. She has a very nice frame for draped clothing, everything is-” 

“I don’t mean her dress,” Courtney clarified. Leave it to Violet to think everything was about the clothes. “I mean...how is she _doing_?” 

“Oh...well...she seemed happy. Maybe a little nervous, but...no more than you.” Violet smiled, placing a hand on Courtney’s wrist. “It’s gonna be a beautiful wedding.” 

“I really want to hug you, but I know you’ll yell at me for messing up the dress,” Courtney said, tearing up. 

“Please, that dress can withstand anything-” Violet smiled, pulling her in for a hug. “You’ll be fine-” Violet whispered. “From one married woman to a soon-to-be other. I promise-” Violet pulled away slightly, looking into Courtney’s eyes. “This is right for you.”

“Thanks. Merci.” 

“Bien sur.” Violet gave her one last grin before she walked over to Melati, kissing both her cheeks and speaking quietly to her in French, the little girl laughing as her mom walked away. 

***

When all was said and done, Courtney was happy with the decision to have both of her parents walk her down the aisle. As the string ensemble played “Revelation Sunshine,” she looked around at the faces of all the most important people in their lives, her own heart full of love for everyone who was there to support them, so many of them people who’d uplifted her countless times throughout the years. 

There were her LA friends: Adore’s bandmates, Shea and her girlfriend Sasha, Gigi, and many of her current and former coworkers from both coasts, including Andy, Charlie, even Derrick, the director of her first ever music video. 

Jujubee and Detox were there with their whole family, little Julia kneeling on a chair to get a better look at her dress. Beside them were Jinkx and Alaska and their two little ones, who waved to Courtney as she walked as if she was on a parade float. Violet and Sutan stood with Raja and Raven, the four of them people that Courtney would never have imagined being supportive wedding guests ten years ago, but of course, so much had happened in that ten years. 

Latrice, who had been so much more than a manager: at times a life coach, a therapist, or a disapproving parent, stood with Jeremy Scott, Brie, and some of her Glimmer co-stars. 

In the next row, Morgan, Tyra and Naomi looked on happily, beaming with pride for their friend, beside two of her oldest friends from Brisbane, all of them happily bonding over drunken shenanigans the previous night. 

Fame looked gorgeous as always, in a pale beige dress that was suspiciously close to being white. When Bianca caught her eye to give her a wink of approval, Courtney nodded slightly at her, grateful that they could still be friends after all they’d been through. 

As they approached the altar, Courtney grinned happily at their wedding party. Vixen’s friends and family looked amazing, especially little Mandy, holding Melati’s hand protectively, both of them adorable in matching blue dresses. She gave Tatianna and Honey a big smile as she finally reached the front. Then, she turned to kiss her mum, who was pretending not to cry, and her dad, who was openly weeping. 

Adore couldn’t help reaching out and hugging her from behind as she stepped up to the altar, and Ben, always the boss, yanked her back. Courtney giggled and rolled her eyes, reaching back to squeeze Adore’s hand, making sure she knew that it was all okay. 

And then, she turned around just in time to see Vixen appear at the top of the grand staircase, breath catching in her chest at how absolutely radiant she looked. 

Her dark skin was glowing in the soft light, offset by a cream-colored, lace a-line gown. Her box braids had been swept into an elaborate updo, adorned with the same silk flowers that decorated Courtney’s own dress, and those same colors were embroidered into the bottom of the skirt. 

The whole effect was stunning. Courtney watched her, absolutely entranced, as she and her mom made her way down the stairs and up the aisle. It wasn’t until she stepped up beside her on the altar, reaching out a hand to gently touch her cheek, that Courtney realized there were tears dripping down her face. 

“Are you already crying?” Vixen asked as she dried Courtney’s cheek with her thumb. She said it in a low voice, one that only Courtney could hear. 

“You’re just so beautiful,” Courtney whispered. 

Vixen’s lips curled up into a soft smile. “Shit, now I’m crying.” 

The officiant leaned forward and quietly asked, “May I begin?” 

Vixen clasped her hands tightly. “You ready to go?” 

Courtney sniffled, smiling through her tears, and proclaimed, “I’ve never been more ready for anything.” 

*** 

Vixen wrapped her arms around Courtney’s waist on the dance floor as the band played “Revelation Sunshine.” The whole day had been like a dream, their friends and family showering them with love. After hours of partying, things were finally winding down. And as thankful as Vixen was for every single person who’d come to support them, suddenly all she wanted was to be alone with her wife. She pressed her lips to Courtney’s temple, inhaling the familiar scent of her hair. 

A soft sigh left Courtney’s lips as she let Vixen pull her in closer, a sigh that told Vixen exactly the mixture of exhausted, content, and giddy she was. 

“Hey...what do you say to an Irish exit?” Vixen asked. 

Courtney tilted her face up, giggling. “In Australia we just call that leaving.” 

“Perfect. We can honor your culture.” 

“Will your family be mad?” 

“I can apologize at brunch,” Vixen said. “Come on. Let’s enjoy our wedding night.” 

“I might be a huge disappointment,” Courtney said, eyelids already heavy, admitting, “I’m so fucking tired.” 

“Well,” Vixen began, arm around Courtney’s waist, guiding her to the exit. “ I read an article that said that most people don’t have sex on their wedding nights anyway.” 

“Really?” 

“It may not have been an article. It may have been a factoid on ‘Married at First Sight,’” Vixen admitted. 

“Is that a reputable source? Will it survive a peer review?” Courtney giggled. 

“Hmm, depends on the referencing system,” Vixen said, making her laugh more. 

“I love it when you talk Academia.” 

Vixen shook her head, unable to wipe the ear-splitting grin from her face as they climbed the steps up to their suite, fingers laced together. 

Before she opened the door, Courtney stopped her, a hand on her forearm. 

“Wait.” 

“Everything okay?” Vixen asked, studying her face. 

Courtney nodded, fingers sliding up Vixen’s bare arms, a smile tugging at her lips. She took a deep breath and said, “I just...I can’t believe you’re finally my wife.” 

Vixen dipped her face down for a tender kiss, pressing her against the door before whispering, “Let’s go in and take off our stupid heels.” 

“Ohhh, god, you know just what to say,” Courtney moaned playfully, moving aside so that Vixen could turn the antique key and unlock the door, pulling her inside. 

Minutes later, both of their gowns were tossed over a chaise lounge, shoes and undergarments strewn about the floor in a haphazard trail leading to the bed, where they collapsed together in a tangled heap. 

Vixen pulled the covers up over their bodies, kissing her wife on the cheek before murmuring, “Goodnight, baby. I love you.” 

“Night,” Courtney whispered, eyes already closed. Vixen assumed she was halfway asleep until she added, “Thanks for marrying me.” 

“Anytime,” Vixen laughed, resting her chin on top of Courtney’s head. 


End file.
